AIBU to think neighbours should not be naked in their garden?

[babypickles]

For context: Our house is on a new build estate and the houses are pretty close together. It’s fairly easy to see into neighbours gardens because the trees etc are not well established yet.

AIBU to say my neighbours shouldn’t be naked in their garden. They are often out in the garden totally naked taking photos of themselves. They have parties quite often and it’s not uncommon for them and friends to be out in the garden naked / using the hot tub etc.

Am I being a killjoy ? Seems excessive to me.

We had a couple opposite us with no bedroom curtains
so got treated to a daily show of bare flesh
played it down didn’t make a big deal novelty soon wore off and we just found it amusing
didn’t help that our dining room table is in front of full length patio doors opposite them

I also forgot to add one of the guys in my rock n roll Sunday night quiz team does the naked London bike ride! I had a LOT of questions for him…

IKR! I'm wondering if these are autocorrect fails or if people really don't know the difference between a naturalist and a naturist... could get them into some sticky situations, I'd have thought!

Big difference between 'spying' and accidentally catching a glimpse of something you really wish you hadn't.

I walk around naked in my apartment with blinds up, with other apartment blocks all around.

I just couldn’t care less.

What’s wrong really, with people seeing your tits and arse?

I think it is weird and most people irl would also despite the views of Mumsnet folk

In a successful society personal freedoms need to be balanced with the impact of those freedoms on others. People think differently about the balance required. IMO in modern society we seem to be moving towards pursuing individual autonomy and personal freedom at the cost of neighbourliness and consideration for others.

In this case - people are choosing to spend time in their garden naked despite the fact they know they are overlooked by neighbours who may not wish to see them naked. It’s not illegal, it’s not morally wrong, but it would be hard to argue they are being considerate of their neighbours. And many people will think well why should they be - it’s their garden, their body, their choice. Some people will place their right to exercise their personal freedom to be naked as a higher priority and some will place their duty of consideration for their neighbours as a higher priority. That’s why these kind of threads are always so polarising.

I honestly thought it was always illegal to be naked anywhere where people may see you (outside of your home), except on the nude beaches.

I guess you learn something every day.

Agree with this.

There’s definitely been a change in society over the last two to three decades. Previously it was very much typical of British society that you thought about others around you, and were considerate of them.

Now there’s much more ‘I’ll do what I want, and nobody tells me what to do’.

It’s not just unwanted glimpses of naked arses in next door’s garden, it’s stuff like playing Tik Toks loudly on a train without headphones, and having parties in your back garden till 3am every single Saturday night.

It worked better all round when we were more considerate of others and not just all about me, me, me.

Really i saw my granny and other nudist adults when I was a child, its normal and healhy to know how bodies look, nudity is not sexual its our natural state making it such a big deal is worse and shows the result of such prudishness.

I agree.

I also think that one of the things that divides opinion is that people can’t help picturing their own house and garden no matter how much info is given about the poster’s. It’s the same with parking threads I think. You can’t help having in your mind’s eye a street/house/garden layout that reflects something you are familiar with.

So people with lots of privacy are thinking ‘so what?’ while people like me in a London Victorian terrace are thinking no flipping way would any of us do this.

I agree, look at my posts.

Im sick to death of the ...they can do whatever they want in their own garden....brigade.
No it isnt acceptable especially if there are children around.
Scumbag behaviour isnt ok just because you own or rent the place.
When you have neighbours you need to keep the peace and have some consideration and manners.
There was a fatal stabbing here recently when a long standing parking dispute made a neighbour finally snap.
He killed both house owners leaving their children orphans and went to prison for life.
We're going to see much more of this as the population grows and people are forced to live in smaller spaces and it gets hotter every year
If people behave like rancid, mannerless scum there will be more and more violence.
Im a naturist and keep my naturist activities to a proper club with a pool. I dont expect my neighbours to have to look at my wrinkly old buttocks.
Likewise swingers. Go swing at a club. We dont want to see it.

It really is not 'prudishness'.

It is about not wanting random people to force the sight of their naked body on others.

I don't want to see my neighbours naked, thank you very much.

I also think you are very naive to think that nudity is 'not sexual' and that it is all about 'our natural state' when we know full well that some people absolutely get a thrill out of exposing themselves to strangers.

It really is not OK either for kids to have to look at the naked bodies of strangers.

Frankly it is just basic manners and decency to respect other people and grasp that as a society we have boundaries in place which involve not wanting to be expose to nudity unless we choose to.

In the OPs case it's not just "traditional" nudist gardening in the nude or whatever though - it's a lot of adults drinking, carrying on in a hot tub, and with an outdoor bar called "dirty dicks" (or something). There's no way there's not sexual activity going on, and in the location, that's public indecency.

Yeap. And there’s always so much faux naivety about the behaviour.

“Whattt?? You would care if your child saw your next door neighbour’s penis? Really?! iTs juSt a BODY” Eye roll.

I’ve seen it asked a few times but nobody has answered.

Is the problem just naked men or are women naked in their gardens an issue as well?

Sound like a real bunch of exhibitionists to say the least. I would get in touch with your local council and police for advice on this.

As you say your house looks straight into their garden.You are not being prudish, nosey or judgemental. Just decent and respectful

As another poster said they thought this maybe about some kind of sex stuff. Maybe they are Swingers. Or post their escapades on the Web. You know idiots who are legends in their own sad little world

If they start to grow pampas grass in their garden. That is a sure sign that they are. In joke from the Seventies.

Best of luck.
X

Well, I didn’t grow up seeing my granny in the nude and I doubt that many people did so no it’s not normal.

I live in a London suburb with a small garden that is overlooked by about 4 houses and their gardens are overlooked in turn. No one is out there in the nude to be seen by their neighbours, there’s just no need.

I’ll bite - I don’t want to see any of my neighbours naked thanks. I don’t care what sex they are.

but strictly speaking if we needed clothes then why was we born naked ? it seems a cultural thing as there are many tribes in different parts of history that had different levels of clothing

It won’t do your son any harm.

Of course we are born naked. Nobody of any culture is born with clothes. I imagine the type of clothing worn throughout history varies according to materials available and climate and later on in accordance with displays of wealth, clothing required for different jobs and religion.

Oh for goodness sake.

we’re not talking about a primitive tribe somewhere far flung. This is a suburban British garden in a new build estate. Where nudity is neither expected nor welcome.

then why do we have groups of nudists ?