To think 26 year old dating 19 year old is weird?

[ChicJoker]

I’ll leave sexes anonymous. I know both parties well, they have been dating for around 2 months. One is my sibling. I feel really really irked by it. It’s weird right?

As I said I know both of them. One has just left school.

Love all the assumptions of the sexes and who I’ve raised 🤣🤣🤣.

as I said I’ve already made my decision and I don’t agree with it. There’s categorically no reason whatsoever for a 26 year old to be interested in a 19 year old. There are no exceptional circumstances. It’s disgusting.

So according to some on this thread I'm predatory as I'm 55 and my husband is 51 😂alert the police !!!

I dated someone who was 28 when I was 19 and we worked together. We are still incredibly good friends 😀

You've left the sexes out of it but it changed the way I think about it.
I would I admit think it unusual that a 26--year-old woman was dating a 19-year-old man.
Not the other way around, though.
In any case, I think weird is way too strong a description here. So no not weird.

I mean that they're both young adults. I wouldn't say it was creepy or coercive or any of that stuff.

Is that what you want to hear? Because if it is, the answer is a firm no.

I can’t see what’s wrong with this

Oh don't be daft. It's not like one of them is 16 and the other 40.

I think it's sad that you see malicious intent in all seven year age gaps, no exceptions. As you'll see from PP, there are many happy couples who met at similar ages as the people you mention.
You evidently don't like either person. Is that the real issue here?

Is it a 26 year old woman shagging your 19 year old son?

If you are immature enough to be reliant on Tiktok for your dating advice, this will be why you think it odd. It is very much a young person position. Once you get a bit older, you will see that a 3 year difference is nothing.

This topic comes up every other week. A lot of people apply a 'half the older age plus 7 rule', which this barely falls outside. And dependent on when their birthdays are, wouldn't at some points of the year, even now, let alone in a year or two if it lasts.

Yes it’s a bit weird but it’s not dangerous weird imo. I’d just think the older one was immature.

I shall go and have Mr Monkey retrospectively arrested cos we met and started dating whe I was 27 and he was 36 😆

Surely the life experience you have has at 19 depends on circumstances and upbringing. At 19 I was at university 200 miles away from home living in halls with no parental oversight.

By then I had had a summer/weekend job since 16 that I commuted 30 mins by train to (after a half hour walk to the station), I had spent the summer in London on my own doing work experience with a large media organisation at 17. I lost my mum when I was 16 so at 19 was well versed in cooking, cleaning and generally looking after myself. My dad was an overworked single parent with no experience of university so I managed all the application and finances myself.

TL:DR it is perfectly possible for 19 years olds to have decent life skills and experience.

So why start a thread then?
You have decided its disgusting so why ask for opnions?

Try reading the thread if you can manage

Actually this reminds me of an old boyfriend who had a step dad who had the same name as him (who was separated from his mother).

Anyway, they had a business: I'm not going to say what it was but think along the lines that people would refer to the stepdad as 'Dave from the White Lion'.

Anyway, I tell my mother that 'Dave from the White Lion' has asked me out.

She goes mad, ranting on about how much older he was etc.
Im really perplexed by her reaction because he's only 5 years older.
(My ex was 24, I was 19) and after a while we sorted it out and she said, that's OK then.

She thought I meant the stepdad who was in his late forties.

When I was young (long, long time ago). It wasn't unusual to date someone 4 or 5 years older. It seems things have changed, DD thinks it's really odd if there is more than about a 2 year age gap.

There's only one weird person in this scenario and it's neither ther 26 year old nor the 19 year old.
If you feel so strongly about it why not tell them to their faces that it's disgusting

I mean each other own my aunty and uncle met at 19 and 35 in the army. By 22 and 38 they were married and had their first baby. She’s now 42 & he’s 58 still together 3 kids down the line. He is looking forward to retirement and being a kept man 😂 he did get a lot of stick for it from his brothers (my dad and uncles) winding him up but it’s their life. My partners 10 years older than me. We both have kids no plan for any more and on the same page about everything so it works for us. Although he’s a big kid sometimes feels like there’s 4 kids sometimes xx

There’s a decent age gap there but it’s a bit much to say it’s weird. There’s five years between me and DH; there’s ten years between a couple of our friends; there was six years between my grandparents. I don’t think it’s that unusual.

It’s weird right?
Not really. Do you think people only date people who are exactly the same age as them?

I think it is weird as well, regardless of the sexes.

But the weirdest would be if the 26 year old is female and the 19 year old male.

Motives? I'm 46 (m) and my wife is 30, we met at work, she asked me out, I initially declined, she asked again, we went out, got on like a house on fire - got married, had family.

Doesn't have to be some dark anterior motive just because there is an age gap.

I find it weird, and the reason I find it weird is evidenced right here on this thread, and in real life, in that 95% of the time its an older man and a younger woman.
If its so normal and fine and nothing to see here, why dont we see it equally across the sexes?
If there's absolutely nothing to see here, then why is it men all the time? Why is it the gender who at a statistical level, carries out the highest levels of abuse, grooming, pedophilia? If it really is a case of you just fall for who you fall for and has no root in patriarchy at all, why is it SO common for one gender not another?

I don't think you can answer this question in the abstract. I think it depends entirely on the individuals. I think there are 19 and 26 year olds who are perfectly compatible and can have a great well balanced relationship. I think you have to see the people and the relationship before you can form a view on whether it is "weird". It is probably more likely to be weird than a 24 and 26 year old, but I don't think we can write it off based on ages alone. People vary!!

Because men and women are different.
I'm sure that there's a lot of 19-year-old males who'd date a 26-year-old woman but they don't want to date him.

That's why.

Things have changed re age gaps. Gen Z even think teens in sixth form dating year 11 is wrong. So 19 and 26 goes against the current age gap that many feel comfortable with. But really it depends on the individuals and what they feel.

I was married for 25 years. Met at 19/27. Nothing weird a out itb