To want to start the day with a tidy house???

[GahGahGahGah]

DP and I have a two year old who hates bedtimes. I do about 90% of them. It usually lasts from 7pm to 9pm. DP uses that time to go on his phone and watch films. He gets up at 6am and leaves at 7am, which is when we get up.

It means I either have to tidy up after 9pm, when I would like to relax too, or more commonly first thing in the morning, when I am getting ready for work and getting DC ready for nursery.

AIBU to be pissed off about this, daily??

and ethos.

Alternatively, the OP could carry on using her dishwasher, having not expressed any dissatisfaction with either its performance or its odour, and her husband could tidy up while she’s putting their child to bed instead of sitting on his arse.

nearly every single house in the world has dishwashers

I don't think so.

Yet I am not overrun with "life mess" or whatever someone called it. And especially wasnt when I only had one small child.

They’re in the dishwasher.

Or the absence of any real ethos when it comes to maintaining the home...

Not sure why you’re feeling so smug about someone being unhappy with the distribution of labour in their home. Your comments are very strange.

You realise you have to press start, don't you?

yes you live in your little world and the rest of us live in the real world 🤣
now I am sure your have another load of washing to get on with

2 hours is excessive!
Kids do not need a bath every night.. and I’m very confused about why toenail cutting is a daily occurrence. Much quicker to do it when they’re watching TV / otherwise distracted.

However YANBU - one of you should be doing bedtime, one of you tidying up. Make him do 50% of the bedtimes. Do alternative days so DC knows what to expect and won’t kick off as much (it’s daddy’s turn today, my turn again tomorrow).

Nope. Id go as far as to say it is cultural.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DXultJ-gRnE/

No we all do all our washing in this house. I do mine on Thursdays. Washing machines are very easy to operate. By 7-8, they're mostly doing it themselves.

😂

I get that he shouldn’t need telling but have you verbalised any of this to him at all?

they will be stinking then by Saturday and full of bacteria by Sunday
then you have them like this 🤣

You wax lyrical about dishwashers being time inefficient, supposedly, but every member of your family washes their own clothes separately?

So is that why he thinks he doesn't need to clean? Because he loses time travelling and you don't? This would be resolved with an open conversation most likely.

Nonsense. You're just doing it wrong. We never have stuff waiting to go in. everything goes straight into the dishwasher immediately it goes to the kitchen, bar a few things that are handwashed. It goes on over night ( on a timer, we can continue to add things to it right up untl we ge to bed) and DH always empties it first thing in the morning while making tea and breakfast.

If we didn't have a dishwasher, then I'm sure we would have things waiting to be washed, or drying waiting to be put away.

This is wild - my DH does majority of bath & bedtimes whilst I clear up downstairs, sometimes we swap, we can then both sit down and relax at the same time

Not on! One person does bedtime, the other tidies up & then you both relax.

Im sorry but how TF is this even a question. 1 does bedtime the other tidies and vice versa. Its a f**king marriage. WTF.

I only came on here to ask how the fuck you manage this, as my children are the same age and are the absolute masters of dicking about and need telling 1 million times to do the few basic tasks that we do every. Single. Bloody. Night.
Genuinely - how??? I need to know!

OP, this situation is bad for everyone in your house and needs changing. It's bad for the bond between your DH and DC for him to never do bedtimes. He should be alternating with you. Yes, it will be hard in the beginning, but it will be much better in the long run. If bed is taking that long then it may be time for a change. And I say that as someone who sits with her 7 or 5 year old until they go to sleep every night. It's obviously unreasonable for you and your DH to have such a wild discrepancy in free time every day. That's bad for you and bad for him because it's bad for your relationship and likely to result in resentment if not burn out on your part.

100% drop the nap, it will be bloody hard for a couple weeks keeping them awake through the day but my little boy was exactly the same, was a really good sleeper up until around 2.5 and all of a sudden was fighting bedtime. As soon as the nap went he was a dream and has been ever since really, he’s nearly 5 and bedtime is no issue.

Tell that to parents of kids with eczema. My nearly 5 year old bathes every other day because it’s better for his skin.