AIBU to find a girl's comment about social media quite sad

[FelicityShagsWell]

I just heard the story on the radio about Kier Starmer wanting to tighten up access to social media for under 16s. A few sound bites from some children followed. One girl said it's unfair because there's nothing else to do. Am I unreasonable to find that utterly sad?

I saw this. Tragic.

Yes, I agree. And books in my case.

Except lots of parents work full-time and don’t have the time or capacity to start volunteering or setting up Brownie groups. Mine were often out of the house 7-6 when I was in my teens as well as working the odd weekend.

Saying people need to just get off their backsides and do more is pretty unrealistic in most cases.

Everyone including adults are going to have to prove their age with digital ID 😞

I don’t find it sad. When screens are removed they find things to do. I’m against the ban, though, because it may lead to us all being required to input our dates of birth.That is far too much sensitive data for a tech company to own on us, on top of our up address.Not that I want kids on social media. God knows, I struggled enough with this, as a mum of the earliest endlessly online users.

This was the northern sense of humour, I thought it was obvious but maybe not.

I find it quite disturbing that this girl was on social media for 9 hours a day and thinks she can only 'stare at a wall'. That is EXACTLY why this ban is needed.

My kid is 11, she has a phone but barely uses it, so she's exactly the target audience for the ban because she's never been aware of it. On the one hand, I agree with the YouTube ban because she always wants to watch it, but on the other, she's really knowledgeable about nature because that's what she likes to watch on it, so I'm a little unsure about that being included in it.

I'm only 40, so the last real generation to grow up without social media (god I love that my uni days were not documented!)

But as a tween/teen I would

• go with my mates to the park / on a bike ride
• walk to the town centre and go shopping with my mates
• go swimming
• go to the library and choose some books to read (still do this weekly)
• do some drawings. I used to love to sit and draw
• learn how to play my keyboard (which I've taken up again as an adult)
• I used to love baking in the school holidays, making cupcakes and biscuits
• Play bulldog/IT at the park
• physically talk to my friends on the phone sat on the bottom of the stairs!
• Build lego - and now with so many adult/niche lego sets available, there's loads to keep kids occupied

All of this is still readily available and can be done for free.

So it's bullshit to say there's nothing for kids to do.

They don't know how to be bored or use their imaginations and that's really sad.

Maybe, but I am very Northern and didn't pick up on any humour or humorous delivery in her response.

We did, me included, doesn’t mean it was a good thing. I didn’t suggest it would prevent anything awful happening but it does give an added level of safety.

I had an awful experience at a sleepover growing up and the hosts mother refused to call my mum (because she was partly responsible for what happened). I wouldn’t put my child in that position, they will have an emergency phone with them whenever they are away from me just in case.

I can assure you many many groups are run by people working full time, and many with children too.
If you want things out of life it’s only fair that you put something back in, rather than bemoaning you’re not served.

I'm sure they are, but it's still not possible for many people.

So stop moaning.

I'm not

I'm NW and everyone I know who has seen it recognised she wasn't being serious, meaning she was saying obviously she would find something else to do.

@MsGreying

Kids who need youth clubs need better home life.

How are you going to achieve that if parents can't or won't parent properly?

Or are you advocating for widespread taking kids away from parents and putting them into care??

OK, but these days....

Town centre shops have closed down,
Libraries have been closed,
Swimming costs a fortune,
Parks are often fenced off and gates locked in the evenings,

Things are VERY different these days in some places.

That sounds like more excuses @Badbadbunny if i'm honest.

I live in a village. We have a playing field that's open all the time, so not every park is closed after 7pm. In fact, it's only our town centre ones that are closed in the evening, none of the ones on the estates across the town. And when we walk the dog around 8pm, it's packed with kids playing football, kids hanging out, teens on the playground,

Our library is across the street from us - and the library when I was growing up was also 2 roads away. Our country libraries are buzzing because they've made a HUGE inroad in pushing them as 'not just for books' In fact, in the rough estate in my town, the library is one of the community hubs with a basketball court outside and next to another open play area.

I will concede swimming is expensive.

But that still doesn't stop kids using their time to read, create artwork, learn how to bake, create a cartoon strip, play a game of wallsy with a football against a wall/fence, mess around with a skipping rope, literally phone their friends and hang out with them in person. None of that costs anything.

And if those kids STILL complain, then they need this ban to learn how to be creative and use their imagination. Or just be bored.

They've still got their computer games and their streaming services

It's reality, not excuses. A library that's closed down IS a library that's closed down.

Likewise our village doesn't have a playing field that's open - it's fenced and the gates are locked.

This is reality, not excuses.

Your area is different. Can't you understand that different places have different amenities.

Exactly. MN is oddly unimaginative sometimes.

Same happened a few years ago when lots of towns started seeing their High Streets being taken over by charity shops, vape shops, turkish barbers, etc - lots of people on here and other fora were in denial because they still had a vibrant high street. Now, more and more people are bemoaning the state of their High Streets as the rot has spread to lots more towns, including some "naice" towns.

Some people can't understand that a large village which used to have several shops, 3 pubs, chemist, post office, library, scout hut, GP surgery, etc., now has nothing. They're in denial as to what is happening because they don't directly see it in THEIR vicinity.

Exactly @Badbadbunny.

When people on here describe what's available in their areas it makes me realise how skewed the membership is.

Our town doesn't have a pool, or a bowling alley, or a cinema. There's no McDonald's or fast food or Costa for kids to hang around in. There's no scouts or brownies, no library (unless you can go on a weekday before 3pm), no shops or cafes to sit in etc.

DD was talking about the stare at wall girl, called her a legend.

There is a school near me that actively encouraged phone use. They had apps for students they used phones in class. It was one of the many things that put me off when we looked around.
Lots of kids from DDs primary picked it because of it. DD had a friend who kept trying to ring her at break time because they were allowed to use their phones.
They’ve announced phones are banned in 2 weeks, how do they dial that back now?

I think actually we’ve actually in agreement in terms of not every where is the same.

yes my local area sounds different to yours. But that doesn’t make you right and the only “valid” source in the same way it doesn’t make me right and the only “valid” source

but that still doesn’t negate every other point I made. These kids can still watch films/tv/gaming. They can go on a bike/for a walk/read a book/draw a picture. Have a real life conversation with someone in person.

quite frankly every single one of us (including us on this thread, myself included) could ALL do with putting our phones down and getting outside and living in reality.

I was addressing your comment "walking down the street looking at their phones" which is a different scenario than people on their phones not looking where they're going. I agree that people need to be aware, however a lot of us are capable of doing both at the same time.

Stare At A Wall girl was taking the piss out of the journo who asked her what she'd do now