2.5 year old toddler and talking to him

[shutmumsclub]

I have a 2 year 7 month old that is generally well behaved.

However I've noticed I tend to be quite short compared to my other mum friends.

For example we are having lunch and he's starting to claw for my drink and climb all over me.

Instead of doing the whole gently parenting thing I just tell him to stop misbehaving and get away from mummy's drink..he did what he's told but I just feel like a shitty mum.

Other mums can ignore or gently talk about it with their child but I seem to get annoyed quickly.

I think she’s trying to promote it too, and have a subtle dig at those of us who don’t practice ‘gentle parenting’

If it is done properly it does work.
People who say it doesn't have no idea what it is.
It doesn't mean letting your children do whatever they want.

No I haven't. You guys are all promoting it. I don't really know exactly what it means but you are all transfixed on it. It's kinda weird

In 5 out of 9 posts you mention gentle parenting. You put it in your first post as part of what you were asking about.
What exactly are you wanting??

Am I am not a proponent of gentle parenting. For the most part I think it is badly done and lazy.
Some people do it very well. Many don’t.

🤣 ok I think I’ll just let you get on with your night. Many people have responded. Take what advice you will!

But the other parents are keeping firm boundaries from that description?

The phrase “gentle hands” really bothers me but I couldn’t tell you why.

OP, I have a three year old, I’m extremely firm and clear with her when she does things I don’t like or appreciate. There’s nothing wrong with that, all kids and parents are different and have their own dynamic, that’s what she needs to know when she is misbehaving. I don’t care about what other parents do tbh.

You specifically mentioned it in your OP, but you don’t want us to talk about it?

Also, calling other posters ‘weirdos’ is out of line.

Lucky it works. Defo wouldn’t have worked on my child ar that age just telling him to stop! If it worked that’s all I’d do too

Are you snapping at him and being pissy? I don't recommend that as a communication style.

Do what feels right to you, there is no absolute right or wrong and all children are different and need different treatment.

I just wish I could be else firm but he will come along and grab my face (for example). I don't expect it and it fucking hurts. I wish I could not react as strong as I do, because he's a toddler, but I'm also a single mum and tired.

Mostly we do stuff that doesn't end in a battle, eg he leads the way I'm play but then he will do something which is awful such as jump on me whilst I'm on the bed, and acts like he's in the www ring... But doesn't realise he's mm away from hitting the wall which could hurt him etc.

I just wish I could be like my friend who is like "DD don't you want to do something else". I'm just direct bit maybe tone isn't great.

You have to be the one in control, obviously you can't be physical but being verbally strong is fine when necessary. Don't do that! Stop that! Strongly and with a commanding voice can be necessary sometimes. Not with menace but with a different voice than you usually use so it attracts attention.

I think you actually need a change in tone so they know this is positively not allowed. The tone is more important than the words for small children.

.

Why did you delete your post? I had a look at the original and it sounded nice enough.

There's nothing wrong with being firm especially when he's hurt you but if you want to be more like your friend in other scenarios you could distract your child rather than being short with him.

Have a few ideas up your sleeve ready before the situation happens. What shall we do after lunch? Where's your drink, can you get it? Wow, look at all those clouds outside, I wonder if it's going to rain. Could you put this in the bin for me?

You sound fine to me!