Bus seat deference to a nun

[Relightmy]

On holiday overseas recently DH gave up his seat on the bus for a nun who got on at a later bus stop.

The nun wasn’t particularly elderly, didn’t look infirm, and DH is very much an atheist from a non-religious family.

When I asked why her given up his seat he had no explanation beyond “Well, she’s a nun”.

AIBU to think this was a curious move by DH?

Lots of you reacting to my calling nuns serene . And yeah I was taught by Irish nuns and agree that they were in no way kind or nice . They were a race all their own . But I find most nuns in other places especially Continental do exude contentedness. Must be the sunshine .

Assuming criticism in the face of curiosity sounds like an excessively negative way to live.

My DH gives his seat up for women generally. He's not sexist, just very gentlemanly. It's a lovely quality and I would never take issue with it.

It is showing far better manners than the school children plus teachers on a trip abroad.

Getting onto a shuttle bus ( seating) and doing so first before the elderly people waiting got on and then found themselves standing.

I was so cross I remarked to the teacher that it was a shame older people were standing ( I am talking about mid 70’s + etc ) and children about 12 -14 were all sitting down. And that none of them had offered anyone their seats. I was standing. But did not need a seat as not as frail as others.
She did eventually ask two of them to stand up and offer their seats. Which they did without quibble. Two of them. There were about 20 + children on the bus. And about ten old people standing.

Your DH has old fashioned manners. Be glad of it.

My friend, in her late 50s, was surprised when a young person gave up their seat to her in Prague. She accepted graciously.

Is that true? I assumed they had to wear the habit or whatever it's called. I guess there's less chance of getting a seat on the bus if you're in plain clothes. 😂

I remember my auntie was friends with a nun who'd taken a vow of silence! She was allowed to speak to us when we visited though, but she had to be behind a plastic screen! This was in Ireland. She definitely wore the garb.

I respect this. Nuns have dedicated themselves, however you look at it, to a life that is not attractive.

Yes, it does depend on the order. The enclosed orders are much more likely to still wear a habit, but then they’re not the ones you’d be bumping into out and about.

When I was at school in the 80s in Ireland the nuns in the school wore habits (veils and knee length skirts/tunics) and had religious names. Now the same order use their own names and wear everyday clothing…still quite conservative though and plain or muted tones (eg navy/blues rather than reds or oranges) and sensible shoes.
The ones I know dress like that anyway, but then they’re all older women too so that might also influence the shoes etc.

Thank you. That's interesting. I often wondered what motives modern day nuns. And as you say, they seemed to be often fairly elderly even back in the day. So you wonder if they might end up pretty much dying out? I mean I doubt they would in a catholic country. But maybe in the UK?

Also if the equivalent is a priest, they seem to have a lot more of a purpose and high social standing. And are mixing with the lay public regularly. But there must be priests who aren't the head of a church/parish etc?

The average age of a nun in Ireland is over 80 now I believe. Many convents have closed.

No it’s a sign of devoted oneself religion.

It was a kind gesture and respectful gesture.

Lovely qualities in this day and age.

My late cousin was a nun. She could be very funny about the way that her habit attracted a particular kind of slightly old-fashioned courtesy. Nuns are often quite self-sufficient women, what with existing in a world with few men, and yet a lot of people treat them as if they couldn't possibly have heard of feminism.

What?

Watch the Magdalene Sisters and see how evil some of those women who "devoted themselves to faith" actually were.

I think it's sweet. I can't articulate why.

Most Catholics and non Catholics educated by monks and nuns certainly don’t have fond memories of them. Some are downright disturbing. We had an alcoholic nun in our convent who used to hide the bottles in a cupboard in a not used much hall in the convent. Some were ok/nice.

I’m sure the nuns at my convent (virgo Fidelis) the sisters of the lady of fidelity (from Normandy) still wear habits and veils.

My friends and I all have very fond memories of our time at a convent school. There were some really dedicated teachers there.

We had nuns from all over at our convent, Austrian, Portuguese, Spanish, Irish, English. Some lovely some not. The more recent postulants (correct term?) and nuns are from Asia/SE Asia by the looks of them. It’s a French order but you don’t necessarily have to speak French I believe. They were judgmental and bitchy in a lot of cases even about fee paying pupils. When Madonna’s Like a Prayer video came out they were criticising and cursing her and I just wondered why are you watching it then?! They seemed bored, lots of the time. And some of them in their 80s still teaching really shouldn’t have been! Our main priest was lovely, had common sense and not into gossip. You could talk to him if you wanted.

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Like I said some good, some bad memories. My Austrian nun who taught me German 121 was lovely. But she scared some of the other girls.

I (50, fat but fit) was on the tube in London, and got into a show-down with a nun (I guess in her seventies). She tried to give me her seat. I wasn’t having any of it. We ended up both standing and left the seat empty. So that was a win for me… I think.

I think it's sad when peoples motives are questioned foe something as simple as giving up a seat for another. Why can't it be just accepted as a well intended good deed.
We criticise when people do wrong and right seemingly.

He did something nice for someone and you’re questioning it?!? Odd.