To not want to drive someone else’s car all week?

[BlueberryMummy]

A friend borrowed my car on Friday because she needed to go and pick up something that wouldn’t fit in her car (it would fit in her car, the only reason it wouldn’t is because her car is full of stuff) and then I had to go out before she got back and her car keys were at mine so she told me to take her keys and her car and then since then our paths haven’t crossed to swap the cars back and I’ve messaged her and called her a few times to ask if we can swap the cars back and she just keeps saying she is busy at that moment but will find time soon to swap the cars back. She’s now asking if she can keep my car until Friday as she needs to go somewhere on Friday and what she is taking won’t fit in her car again because her car is full of stuff and in return I keep her car until Friday. But I just want my car back now. My car is a 2016 Volkswagen Tiguan and her car is a 2024 Range Rover. My husband says I’m overreacting and making a mountain out of a molehill. I feel she is being funny about just giving me my car back, she could have found time already to give me my car back and she certainly could find time before Friday to give me my car back. We both have fully comp insurance on our own cars and are insured to drive other cars but we are only covered for 3rd party damage on other cars. AIBU to not want to drive someone else’s car all week and AIBU to just want my car back now?

Honestly I'd be very wary about what's really going on... what's she actually using your car for? How well do you know her?

I'd tell her she has until X time to return your car or you'll be contacting the police.

Bloody hell OP grow a spine. I’m currently driving a hire car as some trainee bus driver crunched my car, and even though it’s a much better car than mine, I just want mine back. I hate the worry that I might get a tiny scratch or ping an alloy on the hire car.

I would be round there tonight to collect it.

She wants the car because she’s moving stuff around that is heavy and dirty. When you get your car back it will be filthy with some damage either or both inside and outside- she’s moving furniture or garden rubbish or builders waste because she won’t pay for a skip. She’s taken your 10 yr old car because she thinks it doesn’t matter and doesn’t want her new RR to get damaged.
I have a 2016 Tiguan too and I wouldn’t swap it for a RR either!

Tell her she's not fully insured in your car and you are not willing to risk her damaging it and likewise you are not fully insured on her car and won't take the risk driving it. Say she will have to agree (in writing) to pay for you taking out a fully insured hire car for the duration.

Or as others have said tell her if you don't get your car back tonight you will be reporting it as stolen, which effectively it is, lending it for a day is one thing her taking it for a week or more without permission is theft.

I agree she may have damaged your car and it's taking longer than she thought to get it fixed and is trying to fob you off. If you have a local garage try giving them a ring. You could say I think my friend brought my car in to you I can't contact her so could you tell me if you have it and how long it will take.

It is a really bizarre situation and the end of a friendship I would say.

Something fishy going on here. Ring her workplace via their main number/switchboard to make sure shes still around.

Tell her this... Tell her that... FFS, "I want my car back today or I'm reporting it stolen"!

That would be short notice for my local garages 😁but I accept that there may be ones that can fit you in straight away for a job that takes a week, out of interest where might I find such a garage?

Around here (SW) if you want a car serviced or an MOT, you better be phoning weeks in advance. However, if you damage a car or it breaks down, of course they will fit you in much more quickly. Also, if there has been any damage to the OP's car, it may be very minor, hence just needing a week to repair. Anyway, now the friend has declared that she needs longer than a week so who knows how long she is planning on keeping the car?

Just calll the police OP. She doesnt have permission to have your car any longer. And , absolutely ... end the 'friendship'.

She's not your friend and I'd be reporting it stolen at this point.

Why don’t you drive to her workplace and swap the cars there?

as much as I love my mates, I don’t let any of them drive my cars.

Report this to the police now! Your car has been stolen and driven without your permission..

You win the wet lettuce award

Agreed - this has gone from a neighbourly thing to do to driving your car without permission and refusing to return it is theft.
Call the police now.

She needs to know you have rescinded your permission for her to drive your car before you tell the Police it’s being driven without your permission but once you tell her she may do the same to you so you need to make sure you are covered for that eventuality.

Deleted as not RTFT

OP do you have an app for your car? If you do it can tell you where it is in real time

I would head to her work and get the keys and your car. If not there, time to call the police and report it stolen.

She cannot refuse to return your car. She no longer has your permission to drive it. She's putting you at financial risk here

Oh, end the friendship and stop doing favours for people. You really need to work on being assertive, you are way too passive and people like the person now driving your car are going to take advantage of that.

I find it really weird she happy driving your old but sure a nice car v her costly land rover

how far away from you does she live ? I would go over late in the evening and take the car

I wonder if TWOCing might be a useful offense here? It's Taking Without Owner's Consent and it applies specifically to cars.

Clearly she's not a twoccer 😂

Is everyone missing the fact that the OP is driving around in the friends car?
The mildest of investigation would unearth the original agreed swap

Yes it's gone wrong but being a wet lettuce isn't worth taking up police time

How forceful were you when you told her you wanted your car back?

Something fishy going on…

Another possibility - she is struggling to afford the repayments on her expensive car and fears it is going to be repossessed, but she still needs a car to get around. Swapping cars might feel like the perfect solution - for her!

No, unless the OP communicates clearly that the original agreement is no longer in operation, the friend isn't a TWOCer. But, as I said up thread, if the OP tells the friend the agreement is off then she leaves herself open to the same problem.

If it is reported as stolen to the Police, will that flag up something with YOUR insurance company for that registration number? Could this cause problems in the future with you insuring other vehicles and the value of your car if you come to sell it? I am not an expert on cars, but I have been looking at them with a view to buy something recently. Please feel free to do your own research.

This from -u-pull-it.co.uk -

Vehicle salvage categories are UK insurance write-off labels that show how badly a car has been damaged.
Cat S means structural damage, Cat N means non-structural damage, Cat B is parts-only, Cat U means unrecorded, and Cat X means stolen and recovered.