American Influencers who terminated for T21.

[ScaredButUnavoidable]

Has everyone else seen all the hatred online for the social media influencers who have decided to terminate a pregnancy due to a diagnosis of T21?

I have no idea who the couple are but today my social media feed is full of really abhorrent articles, videos and posts aimed at them (and about termination in general) and I’m just horrified.

Unsurprisingly they are in America, but even so.

I’m assuming the couple have been streaming videos about the pregnancy since the start and this announcement seems to have sparked absolute outrage.

Ok, the Influencers must have realised that some people would be upset by their decision, but at the same time, those same people must understand that although couples choose to have terminations based on medical conditions it’s still usually a very difficult and upsetting decision for them to make.

Has anyone else seen it?
I’m deleting as much of it as I can from my timeline but it’s constant.
They are even getting death threats.

It’s like a witch-hunt, it’s disgusting 😢

Oh I agree with you, I was just musing about whether a time will come when activists says T21 should not be a reason for TMFR because it isn’t automatically incompatible with life in the same way that Edward’s and Patau’s syndrome are.

There have been people campaigning for years that Downs Syndrome shouldn’t be screened for and so I wonder if one day, if enough noise is made by loud enough people, that they will get their way.

They don’t know what causes it most of the time so an in utero test is way off. It seems very common now though and frankly seems like the worst diagnosis in terms of quality of life for the family. The families I know with non verbal autistic kids don’t sleep, they’re very aggressive, they can’t communicate or even engage with any toys or activities. They spend their lives distressed and locked in. Miles away from the lady I know with a child with Down syndrome who has a lovely life.

I would have made the same decision. I wouldn't have shared on social media.

A local influencer has a lovely little boy with DS. She has aborted a subsequent pregnancy due to trisomy 21.

It's not " their loss" if they don't want to have a child with downs though.

Nobody should be forced to continue with a pregnancy for ANY reason

As I said: Should people with children be hurt by any abortion for the same reason?

15 years ago I had a high risk pregnancy for downs. I had an amnio and felt untold stress not knowing. DD does not have downs. To this day I still don't know what decision I would have made had it been positive. No judgment here, walk a mile in their shoes.

I don't think the outrage is about their decision entirely. I think it is more about the comments he made that could be interpreted to be devaluing the lives of those with DS. I've seen a pretty strong reaction from that community.

I don't know a single person who would be disappointed their baby was perfectly healthy and normal because they wanted one with DS or other disabilities, and that tells you all you need to know. A healthy baby is preferable – for the baby's sake too.

Additionally, many people might know they'd be unable to cope with having a child with disabilities, so while anything could happen later on, they definitely don't want to choose that from the beginning. It's sensible.

Personally, I know I wouldn't want or cope with a disabled child, so I'd terminate too.

But your child could be diagnosed later. Having a child is a risk full stop. I don't think it's straight forward. One of mine has had a lot of suffering and pain. Same condition that led to the death of his sister, but we know about it earlier so it won't kill him. He's suffered for years, surgery, unpredictability but he says he is happy and does enjoy his life. He certainly does make the most of it and is doing well in life. Who am I to decide his life isn't worth it? He thinks it's worth it.

I'm not judging this couple for their decision, I just think a lot of the reaction is the way they talked about it. I'm sure if they could do it again, they'd just keep it all private.

I'm also surprised by the comments from so many people that they were advised to abort but went on to have babies that were 'normal', contrary to the diagnosis. I didn't know it could be wrong so often. I thought genetic testing was pretty spot on these days.

Absolutely. I did acknowledge that – but one can minimise risk as much as possible. DS is a risk one can generally control for, and eliminate.

So for instance, I took the unavoidable risk that my children might be, like me, autistic (and they are to a 'mild' extent) which is quite enough of a challenge to be coping with at times, but I was able to avoid the risk of other disabilities. It's sensible and responsible to do so, if you think you'd fail to cope.

I want my children to be as healthy, intelligent, and independent as possible, for both their sakes and mine, and if I'd known ahead of time that they would be intellectually and physically disabled and likely never able to live a normal life...I would abort. I would want a better outcome, because (potentially severe) disability is not the best outcome. No one is hoping their unborn child has DS.

People abort for finances, abusive relationships, having had enough children, because they're too young, and all sorts of reasons. There's nothing wrong with abortion for disability, and to remove that option would result in a lot more neglected disabled children ending up abused or in state care.

Previous posters are absolutely correct that we should assume that the way this has blown up is not organic.

The landscape in the US is bonkers. The "pro-life"/anti-choice lot only care about the baby until it is born. They not funding a lifetime of potentially complex medical care, SEN education and residential accommodation. All that is coming out of the parents' pockets.

Contrast that to the Nordic countries, particularly Iceland and Denmark, where there is universal healthcare and free pre-natal screening and most women are not choosing to continue pregnancies where the baby has Down Syndrome.