New neighbour has asked us to stop construction on new home until daughter has finished exams.

[Grammarninja]

This is such a tricky one for me. We bought a house that needed a complete overhaul a year ago. We've finally gotten through architects, planning permission and trying to find affordable builders etc. It has been stressful.
We broke ground this week and the neighbours have asked us to stop until dd has finished her exams in 3 weeks.
I really feel for the family and can't imagine how upsetting it must be for them at this crucial time (we had no idea they had a child sitting exams this summer). My husband has offered them an office at his work around the corner to facilitate study. I wouldn't mind postponing if it wouldn't cost us 30k to do so as builders are working to a set time frame. I wouldn't even mind the extra costs we'd incur through having to stay in our current accommodation for another month if it weren't for the builders' costs which we simply can't afford.
I'm worried now that we're going to start off on a terrible note with our new neighbours which would be such a shame considering my current neighbours are like family.
Are we being unreasonable to continue with the build in these circumstances?

Sounds like a deliberate drip feed to me to make the neighbours sound unreasonable - not sure I believe it!

OP I have a child doing very important exams at the moment, and your neighbours are absolutely ridiculous.
Your husband made a lovely offer.
Be wary of such people.

My friend had her daughter doing important exams and her builder started yesterday.
They have waited a year for the builder.

I cannot imagine the entitlement of such an ask.
Noise cancelling head phones or go to your husbands office.

Back away from them.

You can ensure peace from 6 o clock.
Mine all did huge study in the evening, like many students.

I agree with above, be very wary.
Reasonable people wouldn't ask this.
Twats would IMO.

I'm not worried about karma but I am distressed at the notion of putting someone, who's going through a hard time, through more hardship. I couldn't feel for her or her parents more. I'm really sad about this and it has my stomach in knots.

I think they can ask but you can equally explain that you're on a fixed schedule and unfortunately you cannot delay that. However you are sympathetic so you can offer their DD a space to study in the nearby office or a pair of noise cancelling earphones.

I think that is more than reasonable.

It really is the case but not really relevant to this thread as the worry is the dd and her exams.

I think that sounds like a lovely offer. What I would also do is try to give them clarity so she can plan her study time eg “the builders will arrive at 8, have a 30 minute break at 12 and will leave by 4 each day. This week they are doing X so it might be noisier but next week they will be doing Y so it should be slightly quieter”

She might then focus on studying 6-8 at home, then a few hours in your office or the school library and then back home to study more after 4pm.

This is only the case if the neighbours have 0 knowledge of how long these things take. Plus it’s not faffing to start building when it’s convenient for you and not everyone else nearby.

Wish they had been the ones who did my bathroom then!

If you agree to this, what else will they demand?

Are they also going to demand that the unions suspend the strikes on the London Underground, for exams? That would be far more useful.

Adrian Mole accused Margaret Thatcher of being incredibly selfish for calling a general election for June 9th, so candidates were disturbing his O-level revision by knocking on the door. “We’re not trying to exterminate the working class, just trim them down a bit!”

Absolutely agree! 👏

Just carry on with your build. Libraries were invented for a good reason. She can study there. Not a big deal.

She's not going to have an exam every day!

I feel for both sides. Obviously you can't pay an extra 30k but I would have been angry if my dc's studying had been interrupted. My dc would have hated to have had to go to the library every day to study.

Your offer of an office space is good.

I think so long as you keep strictly to normal builders hours - Monday - Friday 8am - 4pm you are ok. It would be wholly unreasonable to have any work outside those days/hours.

i think you should tell them why you can’t delay so they don’t think you are being difficult.

You sound nice.

But are you totally sure you would lose £30k?

Just say ‘no we won’t as that’s not in the deeds or covenants.’

Using this or school/college library would probably do her favours, studying without the distractions she has at home. It's a totally reasonable offer.

Public libraries are open to everyone for free

I know 😞

This is such a MN thing.

We live in an older house and 5 out of the 7 houses in our row have been fully renovated in the last 4-5 years including neighbours on both sides. We did ours but both houses next door were empty during the work due to bereavement.

It wouldn’t occur to any of us to make demands of the neighbours doing work and yes it was inconvenient many times for us. That is bloody life.

Oh and yes there were exams for 2 of our children.

Not a single secondary school in my area has kids on study leave until at least mid june. Kids expected to be in for revision sessions right up to the last big exam (GCSE physics iirc) - she is likely to be in school until 3ish after which the builders will only be around for an hour, and not evenings or weekends.

Check the school website or give them a call and ask when the year 11s finish...

Disagree, we have exam children in the house, wouldn’t dream of asking the neighbours to stop installing their new kitchen. There’s plenty of work arounds if she can’t cope with the noise. Life goes on.

It was very cheeky of neighbours to ask. Ear plugs and libraries is their answer.

They're exams, it's fine. She'll study on an evening and weekends when builders won't even be there.

Please do not give these entitled arseholes another inch they seem to be taking complete advantage of your good nature. Smile, wave and ignore.

Offering an alternative and suitable place to work is a kindness and above and beyond really.

Being clear about what time work may start and definitely will finish by, and giving them advanced warning of particularly noisey works is very helpful.

Beyond that, unless they're happy to pay you what it would cost you - 30K - no, you can't halt the works until after exams, life happens she will just have to get on with it and as you say, THEY had this work done to their house and I would bet they did not delay it for their neighbours childrens benefit.

Building work can only go on between certain daytime hours, there are other locations and many more hours a day where the kiddo can rest and revise.

At the very least, ensure that there are NO weekend works, and work stops in the evening at an agreed hour, ideally as early as possible. No early starts either; the teen will need her sleep.

Well saying the OP had been faffing around ie waiting for planning etc and that she actually wanted to make the girl’s life hard, is a pretty stupid thing to say!