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Can we talk about NEETs?

580 replies

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:10

Sorry if there's a thread already and I've missed it. But I want to talk about NEETs.

Apparently, we are potentially going to have 1.25million young people not in employment, education or training by the early 2030s. This is quite an alarming number, and it feels like we're failing an entire generation - both the NEETs themselves, who don't seem to have very much going on in their lives that might give them a sense of satisfaction or achievement, but also their working peers who will presumably end up having to support them via the tax system.

I really don't want this to be a thread with lots of judgement or criticism of these young people - it seems to me that we must have failed them somehow as a society. I also want to steer clear of party politics if we can. But I really want to understand why we have so many young people in this position right now.

Does anyone have a child in this situation who would be willing to share why they find themselves in this position? What are the barriers to them studying or getting at least a part time job? Are they happy with how things are right now? Are they trying to change their situation? What do they actually do all day? Are they surrounded by friends who are in the same position? What do they do about money? And what do you feel about the whole situation as a parent?

If anyone is willing to share, I really hope we can avoid a pile-on in which the young people and/or their parents are subjected to a character assassination. I would like an honest and frank exchange of views and experiences because I do genuinely want to understand the root causes of this issue, but if it descends into blame and fingerpointing, then the whole conversation will get derailed.

For full disclosure, I do have a dc in the middle of the 16-24 age group, but neither she nor any of her friends fall into this category.

OP posts:
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AnneLovesGilbert · Today 00:15

There have been several threads about it including after the recent Milburn report and his findings and recommendations. It feels like loads of people are talking about this group and there aren’t any easy answers.

Pickledonion1999 · Today 00:16

I do think it's a massive worry. My ds is about to graduate and is 23years old and I fear he is going to end up in this category although he is desperate to find a decent job. He is socially awkward. He has struggled to find part time jobs whilst away at Uni but has done short stretches of seasonal work. I just feel that when there is competition for jobs he is just not going to perform well at interview etc. I honestly think getting any job now is about who you know.
Having said this, my two elder sons ( 26 and 25 are doing well and have always been in employment. At the age of 24 my ds2 is earning more than me or dh have ever done. Most of their friends are also employed, starting to buy first homes etc. I think things have just got really bad over the past couple of years. Add to this a large number of neurodiverse young people and mentally unwell. Just in my immediate family and friends kids there are loads. My brothers two girls in their twenties one has autism and struggles, one has dropped out of uni with MH issues. My close friends all have kids with anxiety, depression, adhd etc. This group of kids obviously need more support to find work but probably not getting it and if kids without problems can't even get jobs then what hope is there for kids like this ? The problem is enormous.

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:17

AnneLovesGilbert · Today 00:15

There have been several threads about it including after the recent Milburn report and his findings and recommendations. It feels like loads of people are talking about this group and there aren’t any easy answers.

Apologies if I've missed the other threads - I did look but couldn't see any.

It is of course a complex issue and there won't be a simple solution. I just want to understand a bit more about how kids end up in this situation.

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TallSturdyGirl · Today 00:18

My lovely clever son, with 2 years work experience and good references took 7 months to get a shit minimum wage job. He applied to 100s with help from us and the job centre and a careers advisor and got 2 interviews. It was soul destroying.

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:27

Pickledonion1999 · Today 00:16

I do think it's a massive worry. My ds is about to graduate and is 23years old and I fear he is going to end up in this category although he is desperate to find a decent job. He is socially awkward. He has struggled to find part time jobs whilst away at Uni but has done short stretches of seasonal work. I just feel that when there is competition for jobs he is just not going to perform well at interview etc. I honestly think getting any job now is about who you know.
Having said this, my two elder sons ( 26 and 25 are doing well and have always been in employment. At the age of 24 my ds2 is earning more than me or dh have ever done. Most of their friends are also employed, starting to buy first homes etc. I think things have just got really bad over the past couple of years. Add to this a large number of neurodiverse young people and mentally unwell. Just in my immediate family and friends kids there are loads. My brothers two girls in their twenties one has autism and struggles, one has dropped out of uni with MH issues. My close friends all have kids with anxiety, depression, adhd etc. This group of kids obviously need more support to find work but probably not getting it and if kids without problems can't even get jobs then what hope is there for kids like this ? The problem is enormous.

Edited

Thanks for responding, @Pickledonion1999. I'm sorry to hear that your ds is struggling to find a job. It must be gutting to get to the end of a degree and feel like you have no clear path ahead of you.

If it is not too intrusive, may I ask a bit more about the social awkwardness? Because I can see how that might hold a young person back. Has he always struggled with social interaction or is it a more recent thing? Do you have any thoughts about what may have caused him to be awkward? And is there anything that could be put in place now (or which could have been put in place when he was younger) that might have reduced the awkwardness that he feels?

We seem to have created a generation in which a lot of young people seem very socially anxious. Don't know if this is a post-covid effect or social media or something else entirely. Or perhaps we just didn't talk about it back in the day. We do need to do something to alleviate the situation though.

I really hope that he is able to find what he is looking for.

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Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice · Today 00:27

I also have kids and stepkids in that age range and know quite a few through their circles and my own. I also work in a related area.

Every single one of the long term NEETs I know (or know of through work) have a few things in common:
-spend enormous amounts of time online and have done from a young age
-(often self or parent-diagnosed) anxiety/depression/AuDHD
-a very unhealthy diet, no exercise, sleep all day/up half the night
-plus one or more of the following; some kind of inflammatory disease, smokes weed, gender confused/transitioning.

I really don't know what the solution is.

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:30

TallSturdyGirl · Today 00:18

My lovely clever son, with 2 years work experience and good references took 7 months to get a shit minimum wage job. He applied to 100s with help from us and the job centre and a careers advisor and got 2 interviews. It was soul destroying.

I'm sorry to hear that. Do you have any insights as to why he struggled so much to find anything?

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MsAmerica · Today 00:30

What's a NEET?
:(

BeverleyBrooks · Today 00:33

My DS may potentially be in this position when he finishes college in a few months time. We are planning to organise some volunteering and part time work for him. The volunteering won’t be a problem but I really worry about whether he will be able to get a job. He is socially awkward with SEN and has no idea what he wants to do next.

If they aren’t going to University then I feel there is a huge lack of guidance. If they are doing the UCAS route, the path is clearly laid out for them.

Apprenticeships are confusing and not always easy to find. There are loads of different apprenticeship websites. Why not one website where they can apply to a number of different apprenticeships, like UCAS.

I don’t think schools and colleges are geared up to help them either. The focus at DS’s college was all about university. I will be helping DS with his CV and applying for jobs, but I can see if you were a young person and didn’t have that help from a parent, it would be easier to not bother.

fashionqueen0123 · Today 00:33

It doesn’t help that there are jobs paying barely over minimum wage wanting years of experience and qualifications. It’s hard enough for older adults. I’ve just seen one for £25k wanting what would take years of study for.

And all the jobs we got work experience as teens in, are dying off. My local supermarket was run by teens in the evenings and weekends. Now it’s automated checkouts. Half of the shops are shut or gone bust etc and its adults working the jobs that do exist.

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:34

Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice · Today 00:27

I also have kids and stepkids in that age range and know quite a few through their circles and my own. I also work in a related area.

Every single one of the long term NEETs I know (or know of through work) have a few things in common:
-spend enormous amounts of time online and have done from a young age
-(often self or parent-diagnosed) anxiety/depression/AuDHD
-a very unhealthy diet, no exercise, sleep all day/up half the night
-plus one or more of the following; some kind of inflammatory disease, smokes weed, gender confused/transitioning.

I really don't know what the solution is.

Thanks for your thoughts.

I guess my question would be whether they are neets because of all of the factors that you've listed, or whether a lot of those factors arise because they haven't really got much going on in their lives. I mean, if I had nothing to do all day and no real sense of purpose, I think I might get pretty depressed, spend a lot of time online, becone nocturnal etc. Hard to know what is cause and what is effect?

OP posts:
measuretwicecutonce · Today 00:34

Not in Employment Education or Training

CrispySquid · Today 00:34

MsAmerica · Today 00:30

What's a NEET?
:(

Not in Employment Education or Training

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:35

MsAmerica · Today 00:30

What's a NEET?
:(

A young person who is Not in Employment, Education or Training.

OP posts:
TallSturdyGirl · Today 00:35

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:30

I'm sorry to hear that. Do you have any insights as to why he struggled so much to find anything?

There are not enough jobs for the number of applicants. We live in a big city and the competition is fierce.

MsAmerica · Today 00:36

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:35

A young person who is Not in Employment, Education or Training.

Ah. A slacker. Thanks.

Can it apply to mature adults, too?

Pickledonion1999 · Today 00:37

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:34

Thanks for your thoughts.

I guess my question would be whether they are neets because of all of the factors that you've listed, or whether a lot of those factors arise because they haven't really got much going on in their lives. I mean, if I had nothing to do all day and no real sense of purpose, I think I might get pretty depressed, spend a lot of time online, becone nocturnal etc. Hard to know what is cause and what is effect?

I suspect my ds may be slightly on the spectrum and does spend a lot of time gaming. However he has a lovely gf who he has been with since he was 16 and has studied hard at Uni. I'm not grouping him in the NEET category yet as he is still finishing off his degree, I just suspect he is going to be a NEET soon but maybe I'm just being unduly pessimistic because I keep reading on MN how hard it is for young people to get jobs !

HeBeaverandSheBeaver · Today 00:38

i think the reasons are multi faceted so I’ll list as many as I can think of. I have a daughter than has autism plus a physical condition and she isn’t working right now. Nor is she likely too for a while yet. Any support she has had has been privately funded by us as parents.

  1. kids have had the chance to work from a young age taken away by health and safety and other laws.
  2. retail has been eroded over the last decade
  3. what retailis left is increasingly automated
  4. covid has damaged this generation more than we could see at the time. Taking social skills away. Growing up has been delayed =anxious kids
  5. parents have had tendancy to keep kids less independent for longer. Worries about knife crime drugs traffic and the Madeline McCann effect
  6. anything involving alcohol is now limited to over 18 excluding bar work etc from younger kids.
  7. wages are too expensive
  8. paperwork and liability insurance is too complicated for work experience
  9. job applications are ridiculous and too long and laborious Also ai screening is not helpful when no experience
  10. socialmedia is addicting and not helpful
  11. no govt help -no incentives for employers to take young people
  12. ai is taking entry level office work
13 . public transport is dire 14.people can’t get a driving test limiting those that are rurals job opportunities
MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:38

BeverleyBrooks · Today 00:33

My DS may potentially be in this position when he finishes college in a few months time. We are planning to organise some volunteering and part time work for him. The volunteering won’t be a problem but I really worry about whether he will be able to get a job. He is socially awkward with SEN and has no idea what he wants to do next.

If they aren’t going to University then I feel there is a huge lack of guidance. If they are doing the UCAS route, the path is clearly laid out for them.

Apprenticeships are confusing and not always easy to find. There are loads of different apprenticeship websites. Why not one website where they can apply to a number of different apprenticeships, like UCAS.

I don’t think schools and colleges are geared up to help them either. The focus at DS’s college was all about university. I will be helping DS with his CV and applying for jobs, but I can see if you were a young person and didn’t have that help from a parent, it would be easier to not bother.

I totally get what you're saying about the lack of guidance for kids who aren't on the university pathway. That seems like a massive gap in the system? A single application portal for apprenticeship opportunities sounds like a brilliant idea, and I think it would make life easier for employers too.

The "socially awkward" factor seems to be a theme. I wonder how we can support young people who struggle with social interaction more effectively.

OP posts:
MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:39

MsAmerica · Today 00:36

Ah. A slacker. Thanks.

Can it apply to mature adults, too?

Please...can we avoid the insults?

OP posts:
Pickledonion1999 · Today 00:39

TallSturdyGirl · Today 00:35

There are not enough jobs for the number of applicants. We live in a big city and the competition is fierce.

This is the problem. There are numerous MN threads where highly qualified people with years of experience are being made redundant and struggling to find work even when they are prepared to take minimum wage jobs, so what hope does someone with little experience have?

Howtinz · Today 00:39

My DSS is in this category. He graduated from uni and couldn’t find a job so got a masters. Now he’s been looking for a job for 8 months. He’s socially a bit awkward but nothing massive. He’s not particularly likable and that’s perhaps a bigger issue. He also went to a non RG - uni. He ignored all advice from us to get summer internships to gain experience in his field. He now can’t even get a part time minimum wage job.

Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice · Today 00:40

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Today 00:34

Thanks for your thoughts.

I guess my question would be whether they are neets because of all of the factors that you've listed, or whether a lot of those factors arise because they haven't really got much going on in their lives. I mean, if I had nothing to do all day and no real sense of purpose, I think I might get pretty depressed, spend a lot of time online, becone nocturnal etc. Hard to know what is cause and what is effect?

I agree, it's probably a chicken and egg thing.

I do think, for better or worse, there is more acceptance/support in society for this drawn-out transition to adulthood compared to when I grew up (late 80s/90s) when it was very much sink or swim.

sittingonabeach · Today 00:42

@MsAmerica it really isn’t about slackers. There aren’t the same jobs available that there used to be for the young. Hospitality is struggling, retail is struggling. Not enough graduate jobs.

johnd2 · Today 00:43

I don't think it's autism, anxiety or spending too much time online causing the issue.
I spent all my time online, was (undiagnosed at that point) autistic and anxious, not too mention socially awkward, but I just applied for a few jobs and demand was such that I got something. That was 20 years ago.
If that is a barrier nowadays then it's not the fault of the young people as that could just add easily have been me.

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