Sister organised engagement party for same week as wedding

[ellie09]

Hi all,

Am I right to be slightly miffed (not hugely, though)?

My sister recently got engaged last month, and we received an invite yesterday to her engagement party.

The engagement party is 4 days before our wedding, so in the same week.

Obviously, I know it wont overshadow a wedding, but it did leave a bit of a sour taste in my mouth.

I obviously havent said anything to family etc.

I'd be more than slightly miffed.

I personally struggle with too many social engagements (introvert) and attending two in the space of 4 days would be really hard for me. I'd be exhausted. I've just turned down a concert with my sister because I have another concert 5 days later (both very far from home, albeit within the UK).

As others say, you know her best. What do you think? To me, it feels like she's giving you the middle finger. Any reason she might feel this way?

Can’t see a problem at all.

Unless you already have something booked for the Saturday to do with your wedding, like picking up suits/dresses, or an appointment (nails, lashes etc), meeting with the venue?

People will still need to buy themselves a drink etc, may feel the need to get a gift (I’ve never heard of an engagement party but I’m assuming people give gifts like a baby shower) and possibly need to buy a new top or something too.

People also have their lives too with other things going on like birthday parties etc which also add extra expense.

A family member should be more considerate of others.

It’s all about trying to steal the limelight.
It’s all very immature.

My sister did this to me, then dumped the poor bloke.
Years later, when she had met someone else she then had the same venue as we had had a discrete party of 25, she booked the whole hotel, and all the trimmings and add one.

She is still a self centred a hole, everything has to be about her. Also is the youngest , who complains about how strapped she is when her wedding 10 years ago cost £25k and they are miserably married and can’t afford to divorce.

It’s about a marriage not the event ultimately but I also had to grin and bear it.

I hope you have a lovely day.

Buying an expensive gift and a new top for one event is a choice, not a necessity.

Well, yes, people do also have their lives including OP's sister. It's no different to anything else such as a birthday party.

It's immature to think that the limelight can be stolen in the first place unless we are talking about proposals at weddings or pregnancy announcements. it is 4 DAYS before and OP doesn't need the limelight until the actual day of her wedding.

It doesn’t need to be expensive for people to struggle to afford 2 gifts in such a short amount of time.

And people will have birthday parties but they’re either not family or you know their birthday is coming up and have budgeted for it.

Most people would be selfless enough to recognise having 2 big celebrations 4 days apart may not be the best idea for everyone.

Of course it’s not immature to think she’s trying to steal the limelight - it’s literally exactly what she’s trying to do.
I’d be embarrassed for her if I was one of her guests.

No one is forced to go. It sounds like it's mostly for the sister and her partners friends anyway.

Why does OP need the limelight 4 days before her wedding?

Could be worse . My cousin announced her pregnancy at her SIL baby shower .