DH wants to miss SIL’s anniversary lunch for Arsenal parade?

[Thegoldenoriole]

As you may or may not know (or care), Arsenal won the Premier League yesterday. DH wants to go to the parade in a couple of weeks. However, we have his sister’s 10th anniversary lunch booked in already, and it would be impossible to attend both.

I think it’s probably reasonable to go to the parade, given it could be literally the only opportunity. Or it could happen again next year! But I’m concerned DSIL won’t feel the same way… DH is a fan, but not to a major degree - he only started following them at uni influenced by his flatmate and I think he’s been to two live arsenal games in his life! The rest of the family aren’t football people at all. I only care insofar as it affects DH.

Thoughts? I would still go to SIL’s lunch and take the kids - they are small and after what happened at Liverpool last year I wouldn’t want them going without me.

My late OH married someone interested in sport and we managed 51 years. Other than Wakefield rugby he had no interest. However, when we watched the rowers win the first gold in 2012 I've never seen his cheer like that, how that stand remained in tact was a mystery to me!

No they clearly don't know!

Yes. Some are able. Some!

Isn’t that because most of us are too broke??

We've ALWAYS called ourselves Gooners! OOH TO, OOH TO BE, OOH TO A GOONER!!

With social mobility plenty of people now live away from their team but still follow their progress. Next season my grandson has been told he has to buy his own ticket and go on the bus if his local team play his parents' home town team!

You do realise that you’re effectively calling yourself a wanker?

Well, that's a silly thing to say isn't it?

LOL she doesn’t even have instagram 🤣

Alert the authorities! Context is everything.

@Thegoldenoriole

Absolutely nothing at all to do with being broke. May the celebrating other peoples wedding anniversary lifestyle never find me. I’m 37 and not long had my 10th. I would be so embarrassed and mortified to ask family members to celebrate with us.

I considered a 10th anniversary party, because it seemed like a good excuse to gather our friends together and enjoy ourselves. We didn't in the end. Nor for our big birthdays, nor for our 25th and we certainly didn't have baby showers or gender reveals. . . But compared with lots on this thread, I don't see anything wrong in having a nice meal or a party. It's an invite, not a summons!! Dh can have a chat to his sister (or your brothers wife?) and see if she will be really offended, and then make up his own mind.

If it was my party, I would hope that he would want to come along. But if he'd rather be elsewhere, Id rather he go, than come along resentfully. I've invited him cause I thought he'd enjoy it. If he won't, then fair enough.

Tenth wedding anniversary party is ridiculous. ARSENAL WINNING IS ELITE.
No contest.

I think I come down on the side of HIBU

Mainly because he already accepted the lunch and because he’s hardly a mega fan on the basis of what you’ve said - if he’s been able to live with only ever going to two games, I think he could with missing the parade.

Factored against this is that I wouldn’t have a 10th anniversary lunch and don’t think it’s really a “thing” - but he’s committed to going, so I think he should.

As a football fan, the parade is going to be a big thing, must bigger than celebrating a 10th wedding anniversary.. not even his own.. wouldn't bother my in the slightest

Genuinely, did you not have a wedding or ever do birthday parties? I think it’s a bit sad to find the idea of gathering your family and close friends to celebrate life milestones mortifying. And I had a tiny 14 person wedding!

Anniversaries are for the couple, nobody else.
Firstly, 10 years isn't that special.
Secondly, it's massively "show off" and smug to boast about your wonderful marriage, and expect anyone else to give a shit. In 3 decades, we have never expected anyone else to celebrate our anniversary with us.
And whilst I'm not a football fan, I get that this is a big deal for him, so of course he should go to the parade!

Surely his sister knows of his love for Arsenal and who on earth makes a big deal about 10 years? Is she Megan Markle?
(I appreciate that it's really just -hopefully! -an excuse for a get together.)

Well we had a parade when we got promoted last year …

I go to people’s weddings and birthdays, not sure what the difference is really. Not heard of people celebrating their 10th, but each to their own. My parents are having a family celebration for their big anniversary and I’m going to that and really looking forward to it.

It’s very difficult and expensive to get arsenal tickets. I was a member, lived next to the ground and could only occasionally get mid week international games which would be difficult for people who didn’t live close and had work and family commitments.

My great aunt is postponing her own 80th birthday party because she wants to go to the parade!!

Unless it’s a MAJOR anniversary (by this I mean 50 years, 60 years etc ) I really don’t understand why it’s anything to celebrate beyond that of the couple.

I might be in a minority but frankly at 10 years it just sounds narcissistic wankery to me 😂. Did you not expect to be married that long???

DH and I will be celebrating 25 years next year and it’s not even occurred to us that anyone else would be remotely interested. We have our own plans (a big holiday) but haven’t told anyone about that, though will mention it to family nearer the time, just so they know we haven’t dropped of the face of the earth for 3 weeks 😂.

So I am with your husband here - even though I’m not a football follower. It’s a big moment for Arsenal and as a fan it might be a once in a lifetime event.

I agree.. it's just 10 years..not 25 or 50.
I would have thought a couple would celebrate together... or does his ds love being the centre of attention ?

Yeah this. Let him celebrate Arsenal 😊

I'd let him go to the parade. It's his sisters anniversary to celebrate not yours. He probably won't get to see it again in his lifetime.

So what if people ha ent heard of doing a 10th anniversary lunch but I dont see anything wrong with celebrating.
Its an excuse to get the family together, maybe have a glass or two if champagne and push the boat a bit further than an everyday gathering!
I think its a nice idea tbh.