DH wants to miss SIL’s anniversary lunch for Arsenal parade?

[Thegoldenoriole]

As you may or may not know (or care), Arsenal won the Premier League yesterday. DH wants to go to the parade in a couple of weeks. However, we have his sister’s 10th anniversary lunch booked in already, and it would be impossible to attend both.

I think it’s probably reasonable to go to the parade, given it could be literally the only opportunity. Or it could happen again next year! But I’m concerned DSIL won’t feel the same way… DH is a fan, but not to a major degree - he only started following them at uni influenced by his flatmate and I think he’s been to two live arsenal games in his life! The rest of the family aren’t football people at all. I only care insofar as it affects DH.

Thoughts? I would still go to SIL’s lunch and take the kids - they are small and after what happened at Liverpool last year I wouldn’t want them going without me.

There is even a fanzine called "The Gooner"

Its always been gooner its an old thing, very old. The insult meaning for gooner is very recent, like 2026 recent.

I think it is between DH and his sister to discuss. A 10th anniversary lunch seems unusual, though in my opinion a modest way of marking it.

I agree with you about your children not attending the parade- not just about crowds but the heat forecast for the day.

I suppose something the DW or DP of a Spurs fan will never have a question about.

why are you getting involved? If he wants to not go to his sister's anniversary lunch then that's on him to sort with his sister. Personally though, I don't celebrate other people's wedding anniversaries and hate football.

Etiquette would dictate that you have accepted an invitation already and don’t switch for a ‘better’ option. Football wouldn’t trump family for me.

He should do the thing he said he'd do first

The important factor is who is paying for the lunch? If the sister might loose some money from him not turning up that’s not great. If guests are paying for themselves then it matters less.

Family should be able to make exceptions.

I will say again when he said yes to the party he didn’t know Arsenal were going to win!

Only in America!

This. Tickets are very hard to get hold of and the members' waiting list is full for quite a while.

See this is why we need that laughing emoji back 😂

This is a first in 22 years and only recently won. Couldn't have know and it's a very unique occasion.

No contest over somebody else's wedding anniversary which is weird and not really relevant to anybody but the couple.

Agree, and I’m not a football fan but can see why it matters to those who are.

Now? They've been gooners as long as I can remember

Pffft - ten years? I've got t-shirts older than that. It's ridiculous to expect other people to care enough about that to miss out on something they actually want to do. Send him off to the parade but let him sort it out with his sister.

And that matters why?!

I have never known anyone celebrating an anniversary like this. Maybe a big one.. like 50 years or something ? That's something to celebrate!
I don't like football but I would 100% understand my dh wanting to go and would support him in doing so in this instance.

I’m not a football fan, but I’m married to a football fan and I’d say football over a 10 year anniversary. 10 isn’t a big deal

Yes for the couple. Not others.

Because circs have changed

Tim really surprised so many people think it’s fine to ditch a prior accepted invitation for a better offer. Because that’s basically what he’s doing.

Thats considered rude. It seems Ike now people are saying it’s ok because having a 20th anniversary lunch is weird. Is that really a good reason to say, ignore the convention that it’s rude to ditch an invitation that you’ve already accepted?

OP I’d tell DH that he needs to talk to his sister and make a decision based on her reaction. I assume he doesn’t want to cause a family rift or embarrass her. There might be some underlying reason why she’s chosen to have this event and it might really hurt her if her brother just blows it off. And he needs to make it upto her somehow too.

who has an anniversary lunch other than their own with partner? I was at the Emirates last night and it was amazing. He’d be mad to miss it

But not in a life and death way - it’s only football! I mean, I’d change plans for a funeral but not for this. That’s just rude!

Somebody else’s anniversary isn’t a life or death situation either.

Explains it all here: https://www.arsenal.com/news/why-are-arsenal-fans-called-gooners

it’s been around for many decades and isn’t recent!