to think some retired people completely forget what it’s like to be working full time?

[cupofcup]

I know retirement is not always easy and older people can have health issues, caring responsibilities etc. But I do think some people genuinely forget what it is like to juggle work, commuting, childcare, housework and just basic life admin all at once.

My DM is retired and will often say how busy she is because she has shopping on Tuesday and a doctor’s appointment on Friday. That is apparently an exhausting week. She is in good health and active. Meanwhile most working people are fitting those things around 40+ hour working weeks.

My retired neighbour constantly comments on how awful another neighbour’s garden looks and how she should tidy it up. The neighbour she is talking about is a working mum with young children who leaves the house at 7am every day. My retired neighbour has a gardener.

Obviously NOT ALL retired people are like this at all. Some are incredibly understanding and helpful. But others seem to completely lose perspective on how relentless working life can be, especially with children.

The bees will be thanking you for your service! 😂

You may not but plenty of people do. Get in from work, have dinner and watch tv from 7.30 until 11pm. Once the kids are more than about 7 they dont take up the whole evening.

All depends how you interpret busy
if she’s a few things and then yes she will by busy with things to do

there no bar set to define busy it doesn’t mean you have to work 28 hours a day before you can declare yourself busy

You started this thread at 11.02am and it is now 1.45pm. I'm surprised you can't see the irony given that you're telling us how busy you are and that you need to buy ready meals. And to answer your question, yes, you should have your nose to the grindstone and not be spending over two hours on Mumsnet at your employer's expense.

Who mentioned a 12 hour box set? Not me, I mentioned two 30min episodes,. Get your facts right.

Oh, me fucking too 😁
Call it 'rewilding' that'll shut em up
In all seriousness, I've never seen so many bees and butterflies in my garden since I stopped giving a fuck. It's rather lovely.

So you could have watched 2 30 mins episodes of something instead of creating this thread. How interesting

YANBU in one respect, however you have to remember that your body and mind adapt to your current "normal". So, having to do several extra things in a week WILL be tiring to her. It's like, now, I can't even imagine sitting through 6 classes of school a day and then doing homework afterwards. I'd much rather do my job, which is so incredibly easy and chilled by comparison!

I retired at 57, bloody love it and everyday remember what it was like to be working 50 or 60 hours per week, children & at someone else's beck n call.

I'm forever grateful those days are behind me, even if i have less money.

Hey OP after 42 years of working....I still remember how hard it was juggling everything, but now retired (and I do still work) it's actually what you need as you get older (retirement that is). You just don't have the same amount of energy, motivation and why? Our agency in life is to do what is true to us at each chapter as you will understand when you get there.

I couldn't compete with my corporate self at 30/40 now and tbh wouldn't want to. Let the young ones have the big salaries and opportunity.

BTW I also love the bees and butterflies in my garden now that I'm not so on top of it!

Yeah.
OP is also forgetting that retired people have been there, done that.
See how you feel when you're old OP, then pop back and apologise....

I'm not sure it's a Retired thing, I think it's more of a Human thing. Some people just love thinking they're busier than everyone else, and telling everyone else about it.

I don't agree older people are a burden at all.
I do think this is an appalling, ageist thing to say, and to assume everyone feels this way is even worse.

Do you have to look after an older person?

I have seen my friend cry at having to take care of her children and her elderly mother.

I have seen another friend have a breakdown from taking care of her elderly mother.

Of course elderly people that we take care of, are a burden. Taking care of them exhausts people mentally and physically.

That is extremely irritating OP. You don’t have to justify yourself here!
Plenty of women do recall what life was like in the early days of child rearing, especially if they had to go back to work!
I am retired now but can well remember how full on life was when DC were small (I went back to work immediately after maternity leave and stayed working until retirement.)
If my DH had not done his full share of the childcare I could not have done it at all. We were also able to pay for a cleaner and our joint income meant life was comfortable financially but, as I say, very full on indeed.
I couldn’t do anything like as much these days.

Retired neighbour rolls his eyes at us gardening on Sunday (day of rest apparently!) more like the only day we have!!!

You are right. Agism is currently à cultural blind spot, so that ignorant people spew their toxic prejudice freely. There is no campaign OLDER LIVES MATTER to shame people out of their complacency. Societies seniors are routinely overlooked and bullied by many ignorant people and the campaign for raised awareness is slow in coming because older people are not narcissists that draw attention to their woes all over the media.

I hope you refused.

I really notice the difference between the energy I had 15 years ago and the energy I have now, I think it’s declined by at least 30%.

I used to be able to do 3 ‘things’ a day. 2 would be work, 1 would be leisure. Now I want to be in my pyjamas at 6pm as I have no further energy left at all.

Im perfectly healthy and for the 2 ‘things’ a day I bustle plenty so it’s definitely ageing.

What about all the women who are asked to take care of their elderly parents? Even though they are working fulltime and often have children.

Do those women have any rights?

I’m 39 and am already living this way as far as is humanly possible 😄ideal life!

Yes. It’s tedious. Often coupled with requests that can impinge on the time you do have.

@cupofcup I can't wait to retire and forget entirely what it was like to work fulltime, have young kids, never have a minute to myself etc etc etc..... 😂

I did, yes.

And then I cared for DH.

It's all just about perspective and what you're used to though isn't it? I have three kids AND I work full time AND I'm a solo parent, so this sounds like a breeze to me!

But in the same way I don't begrudge you for thinking that what you do is a lot, I don't begrudge my dad for telling me how incredibly busy he is because he has 2 appointments that week (although I might internally roll my eyes a bit!). We all have different capacities.

ETA: I just try to be grateful that I'm young, fit and able enough to be able to manage my busy life.