To wonder what else can be done to break the cycle of generations living off benefits?

[Allonthesametrain]

Sounds harsh because It is. As a former teacher, then eduation social worker, now the past few years more heavily involved with school attendance.

My desire has always been to help children from unprivileged backgrounds to know their worth and achieve the best they can and this has been my career from age 23 to 57.

The number of times I've cried, torn my hair out, is immeasurable. I and colleagues have gone above and beyond to support the families, genuinely care about them, but unfortunately the outcome has been, as I've said in title, it's a continiation of the cycle of being brought up within a small community and low expectations.

So many gorgeous kids (supported throughout their young lives until they leave school) who tell you their dreams of what they want to to achieve in life, we do everything we can to enable it and some have indeed broken out of the circle but unfortunately the reality has been...

Parents who live lifestyles of no bedtime routine, tell their kids not to come back before ...pm, sleep in and don't get them out of bed ready and fed for school and as for weekends, pub and take back a new bloke

Parents who have issues themselves and project them onto DC. The kids soon realise they can stay off school for feigning illness and would actually be a comfort to Mum

The parents who just cba and say shall we just still in bed?

Of course there are so many other mitigating factors but these are the 3 main experiences we've dealt with. Unfortunately it really does come down to poor parenting and no matter what interventions we do to encourage attendance, only a minority are genuine.

So the cycle...DC think education isn't important, parents are hopeless role models and can often be aggressive to teachers, a deflection of blame.

Then oh DD gets pregnant at age 15, DS has been reprimanded by the police for scooting around in a balaclava. Then pure hostility when we try to continue to talk to them and what could be done to help.

Basically it's just such a shame, these sweet young kids who say they want to be ... become so influenced by their homelife, a need to fit in with their family and peers from the same estate, that they ignore the support we give them, don't turn up to appointments etc.

For the genuine cases, DC with SEN, the effort to try and ensure they are in best place is utmost and it's heartbreaking there aren't enough of them. Yes, we do know genuine cases and not just so many parents striving for a diagnosis because they feed DC a terrible diet and let them stay up late so are tired and irritable at school.

Expecting some backlash, whatever anyone says I can reason with.

So you don’t think parents are responsible for paying for their own child?

Just you self justify away.. whatever helps you sleep at night. I’ll just get on with my enterprises and you get on with..

That is not the gotcha you think it is. Infact, it is rather pathetic to try and use being on UC as an insult.

I hate the phrase, but i think you need to check your privaledge.

You do realise that some people have paid into the system for decades. I have. And many people on UC work or get it because they have disabled children

but when a person has all help possible and then still choses crime ? then why should they still be apart of society ?

Then what happens to them? I agree prison is the best place for someone who repeatedly commits it.

Anyone else want to join me tomorrow to get hair extensions or their nails done? Lashes too. Then home for some cheesy chips in front of the flat screen telly? I hear that's what folk on UC do on the daily

It is a common misconception held by people in their cushy home offices that UC = jobseeker.

What do you mean? We are talking about 3 children, not hordes. In any case, families with 3 children are in the minority in this country, families with 4+ are rare. Who are these benefit claimants churning them out for cash? It's a racist policy, granted, but in no way an effective one.

What help do people who have committed crime get?

Accessible mental health support for those going through chaotic childhoods. Not from teachers, there is enough on their plates, but from mental health professionals.

I received help when I was in school, I was part of a pilot programmes back in the 80s/90s which were the forerunners for the nurture group and similar we see today, but are still not accessible to most kids.

I also think society needs to shift from viewing aspirations solely in term of jobs. Most adults are not working in the jobs they dreamed of as a kid, and for some, there is no strong desire for a specific kind of job. There are many other kinds of aspirations, but they tend to get ignored even when ones like moving away from their chaotic home (which does require money) can be far more motivating and hold harder than the ideas of any specific career.

I can’t see how anyone can be against that. Giving something back to the community that supports them.

In theory, maybe. In practice - we don't have enough professionals or placements to ensure unpaid work requirements for criminals are carried out properly. It's not uncommon for those on unpaid work requirements to be turned away because the bus/quota is full for the week or there is no probation staff available to run it. Those issues needs to be dealt with first, on top of however many more it would require to have enough for everyone on benefits who is out of work (many people on Universal Credit are in employment).

It would also come across as treated people on benefits as criminals, because as described, it basically is.

so for any of you, tell me why my idea is wrong ? why should society have to bear criminals when they after being given options still want to be criminals ?

Including the wealthy criminals in governments and in major businesses? Or just the poor ones and undesirables like in the days of shipping people off to America and Australia?

There seems to be a weird idea in this that all criminals are only doing crime and not any of the 'viable alternatives'. Many of them have jobs, some quite successful in all aspects of life including crime.

I work with victims of crimes and criminals. Recently, it was with victims of a child rapist who was convicted on historic charges (victims came forward as adults). He had been economically very successful, and used that to take advantage of the types of families being discussed. That's part of the cycle that often gets ignored or only included as a throw away comment rather than with serious consideration - how kids in these household, and in care, are targeted so the cycle is more a downward spiral.

As is not uncommon, none of the victims are working, all on severe mental health grounds with each of them citing being unable to access mental health services and that the impacts of their abuse was not taken seriously or outright ignored when they were children. As a society, we need more focus on helping these people rebuild from the children that were broken, as I was, as early as we can. The victims need far more focus than the criminals.

It's a good local employer, but these are our top kids, children who should be aspiring to at least 7s at GCSE, and they are talking about apprenticeships.

I get wanting kids to look beyond local employers...but why shouldn't top kids look at apprenticeships?

Those top grades will be needed for top apprenticeships - they're harder to get onto than getting into Oxbridge. There are apprenticeships that pay over 30k a year while an apprentice. There are apprenticeships and similar where the employers pays for travel from home and accommodations during studies - these are gold dust, but possible and amazing opportunities for kids where there are serious questions about where the money is going to come from, where there parents cannot or will not provide for them beyond a certain age and they need an option with an income.

This is why we have Provider Access Legislation for secondary schools - kids should be able to see a wide range of ways to move forward, not just the ones their teachers and families experienced. Apprenticeships can be a great option for the top academic kids.

Not a payout. Lifelong income replacement to avoid having to claim benefits in the event that your child is born with a disability.

3 children is LOADS. Many of my friends stopped at one because they couldn’t afford any more. And they are what you might call ‘comfortable’.

Why would someone living on the breadline have 3?! That is seriously expensive.

Sorry hun, no can do. I got to walk my 3 XL bullies to the local playground and frighten some kids. Bloody dogs have got drool all over my 90 inch flat screen TV. I might put them on FB and get 8 pugs instead. The fatter and wheezier, the better.
Then another attempt at getting up duffed with a random so I can get more money. I am nearly 50, but age is just a number, right? My stupid unemployed ovaries.

😂

I personally don't think any of that should have been shared on here

What we need to do is what is best for the country and society overall, over the long term. Forget about individual sob stories and look at the bigger picture, and the greater good.

ill let other experts answer that as i believe a prohibition officer eariler in the thread made my point by saying that some have had all necessary support and still reoffended

Also the comment about people arguing for benefits because we're all on benefits ourselves... 🤣

Believe me, it’s a payout. Cash payout at point of claim. Usually £20k-50k. Please do Google it. You’ll find very major insurer has them.

I don't think you're for real, that's a definite.

well thats down to the op, i just used that quote for my point

What would that be?

"Self justify" what?

Not even if I throw in a tub of curry sauce? Sad times. Hope your dogs are called chardonnay - Mercedes, Tradgedeigh and Venezuela lollipop

Some peoples circumstances can change.