Is anyone actually having passionate/ good sex?

[Polyestered]

I mean those of us in our late 30s/40s and beyond, in a long term relationship/ marriage and in the small child era. What is your secret? Clearly if you’re reading this age 22 and have been with your boyfriend for a year you don’t need a secret 😅

I don’t have a bad marriage (but it’s not wildly great either) but after 15 + years together and 2 invasive and whiny children under 5, the chemistry is zero. There is no passion. I want it back but it just feels like there’s so much “STUFF” between us, we have no privacy from the kids, it’s a buzz kill for me. I simultaneously want to switch off, completely let go and lose all the thoughts in my head but can’t and I’m so uptight, and so bored and frustrated all at once. 😮‍💨 is this inevitable or has anyone managed to keep the passion alive?

I do between 12-24 hours a week, due to long term complex heath issues. I’m bipolar plus other mental health crap, and have auto immune issues. But I do run the house as best I can and do the lion share helping my adult children (one is AuDhd , 2 adhd but still need “check in” support as adults) and 4 grandkids ,2 with additional needs. But in the past I was the primary earner doing 50 hour weeks and he worked weekends around my hours. It worked for us then , I’d come home to 4 fed and bathed kids and my bath already drawn and waiting for me. Then I’d come down in my pyjamas to a hot dinner. Then he would ravage me 🥰😂

Some weeks are better than others health wise and I’m very lucky that I can do things from home in a fundraising role. One week I might be totally wiped out with an infection due to the biological injections but then I bounce back as best I can and kind of make up for it. I’m very very much blessed with an incredibly helpful and considerate husband. I had a terrible night last night with ptsd nightmares and was up from 2am. I’ve got through today but tomorrow he’s taking a days leave tomorrow as I need some help around the house to catch up and he’s happy to use the odd day of annual leave to help me out. He’s in his 60s so happy to drop the occasional day and his employers are very flexible too. We aren’t overly fussed about money and im an expert at stretching money out so it works really well for us. I think the secret to our success is that we are 100% committed as a team and if I called him and said “babe I need you” he would come home regardless. He’s 100% team US. And I bloody love him for it. He’s an amazing man. It breaks my heart when I read posts on here about women tolerating absolute misers who cheat freely. There are good men out there.

I love this! Go you hun! I’m going to try these things.