AIBU to ask if you’d like to have your own bedroom?

[EllisIsEllis]

Inspired by some comments on the bathroom thread to ask this.

Recently my DH and I moved into separate bedrooms due to his snoring, and we both love it! We feel well rested and enjoy each having our own space.

If you are in a relationship, would you want your own bedroom if you had the space?

YABU - No, I prefer to share
YANBU - Yes, I’d love to have my own room

We have our own rooms and I love it. I sleep so well which makes such a big difference to health and wellbeing.

I would like to waft about in my own bedroom, it would have a chaise longe in it and a window seat overlooking a formal box hedge garden with a fountain as centrepiece. But I would go a raiding in to DH room often but I wouldn’t want his manliness in mine.

We ended up having our own rooms when he went on permanent nights and I suffered an illness that required lots of rest. It was absolute bliss and probably saved me from murdering him.

We are now officially separated but I would never sleep with a man again. My bed, his bed, holiday, just no. In fact I love hearing about separate houses and that would probably suit me even more.

I’m planning to do this as soon as my children fly the nest. Snoring, duvet hogging, moving around all the time, and shift work has taken it’s toll for 25 years.

We sleep about 50% separately. He snores/breathes loudly, I wake in the night and the only way I can back to sleep is to read, with my lamp on.

Both of us would love to sleep together however we have to be practical and a few nights of disturbed sleep means we head to seperate rooms for a bit. Been married 37 years.

I would love my own bedroom but the cats aren't having it.
Still at least they only take up 2/3rds of my king size bed & don't snore.

No! DH sometimes snores which annoys me but I can't sleep unless I am really hot, so I need and like the warmth of his body next to mine. I'm trying to train our new cat to sleep on the bed to keep my toes or head warm but he is not impressed. If DH ran off I'd need to get a large dog or two to replicate the body heat.

I agree that the results might be a bit skewed as people who agree are more likely to click on the thread.

I used to do the prod/request for him to turn over to stop snoring, but it just meant neither of us was getting much sleep.

But, tbh, even ignoring the snoring having my own space is bliss!

No i wouldn't. I fall asleep cuddling DH so separate bedrooms would be my worst nightmare.

Sounds glorious! You’d put my wee box room to shame 😆

I think what I would like is my own room for my personal stuff but I would still like to share a bed. I like the intimacy of it, the chats we have last thing at night etc

I'd quite like DH to have a separate "man-cave" that's appealing enough for him to relocate there in the daytime with all the junk he accumulates around his desk area instead of there being two extra chests of drawers plus a load of stuff on the floor in the living room, but I'd hate not to share a bed with him.

(It's not going to happen. He's the son of a full-on hoarder and it's likely that he'd fill an extra room with old cables and bike parts and still choose to sit in the living room with clutter accumulating in his orbit.)

I would love it. We are both light sleepers and both disturb each other! 🤣

But also I think I would just like a space that was only mine. I don't love the logistics of sharing a room.

Does anyone remember MTV Cribs? Once there was an American sportswoman whose large bedroom just had a bed in it. I loved that idea. (Unsurprisingly she had a walk in wardrobe set up in the next room)

I have my own room. Its awesome, I love having my own bed, walkin wardrobe and bathroom.
He has the loft room and the cats sleep with him. I usually end up with a dog on my bed who also snores but us cuter than dh.
I'm a very light sleeper and can take hours to get to sleep. Dh is asleep within seconds which I found infuriating.

Yep;my DH is a terrible snorer.

When we moved in to our house and bed size came up. We were used to a king but wondered if we should upsize - he said no as even though we are (were, he’s passed away now) big people (I’m almost 6’) he said in a super king he felt he wouldn’t be able to feel me next to him (awww). Then came kids and when we bought our holiday home a super king was bought for family cuddles. So the idea of separate bedrooms? He would not have wanted that (me neither).
However, as I said he passed away, after only seven years married. If we had been married for 30 I might be craving separate rooms!
All my friends (we are mostly in our 60s) share bedrooms. One still very much married couple started with separate bedrooms and have been in separate houses for the last 15 years! And I actually do know a couple who live on separate continents and are still happily married, her and son going out for his summers, he coming over to her for her summers (he’s in Australia). It works for them…

Same! DH would be asleep in seconds, then start snoring within a few minutes, so it would take me soooo much longer to get to sleep.

Separate continents, brilliant! 😅

After about 15 years of marriage and me getting to peri stage, DHs snoring was really taking its toll on me and therefore our marriage. I'd get increasingly cross with him, wake him up to shut him up and he'd get cross with me and stomp off to the sofa.

Then we got covid one after another so slept separately whilst we were ill. We never went back.

I hate going on holiday too if it means sharing a room 😩 I need my sleep so badly and don't sleep nearly as heavily as I did in my teens/twenties. I could sleep through anything back then.

I'd love my own house!!

I don't think being "slim" has anything to do with not getting kicked in the night. If you've ever shared a bed with a small toddler you'd know that. Most adults "fit in a bed" 😂

I have shared a room most of my life. First with my sister and then with dh. I don't like not sharing.

We do. For many reasons it’s better for my MH. He has ADHD and moves stuff continuously. In my room I put my stuff where I want it and it stays.

We have a shared bedroom but dh sleeps in another room. It’s not set up as his bedroom just a place to sleep.
We go to bed a different times and have very different sleep habits that really never synched. Together 33 years and sleeping separately 15 and it’s working for us.

I would, and I do! So much nicer.

No. I’m a cuddler and I would climb into his skin if I could. Our bedroom is very me though, it’s pretty “girly” so in our new house there’s a small box room thing that’s going to be a hobby room and while I will use it sometimes for crafts it’s pretty much going to be DHs space - I think that’s fair.

I have and my own bathroom too - perfect