Page 5 | To have a weekday wedding?

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 2026-05-13T09:06:55+00:00

We haven’t decided anything yet, so just looking for opinions really. Budget is a big concern, I don’t want to spend a lot as it’s not a huge priority for me, so it’s really whether we have a simpler celebration at a ‘nicer’ venue, or a more traditional wedding at a not so nice venue. The full on ‘wedding’ would still cost more, but maybe it would be worth it! Things that are relevant: - It would be during the school holidays as DP is a teacher, so children wouldn’t need the day off school. - Lots of our friends are teachers, so they would be off work too and wouldn’t need to take annual leave. - Quite a few of our immediate family members or close friends (including my dad and DP’s mum) work weekends, so would most likely still need to take annual leave if we had it on a Saturday. So it’s not a case of all guests who aren’t teachers would find it easier on a Saturday. - If we did something on a weekday then we probably wouldn’t have an evening do. It would be a ceremony, followed by something like a champagne afternoon tea. Any thoughts, given the circumstances? I also don’t know which day of the week would be best for people, really, as we also have guests we’d invite who work part time anyway.

Original poster

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 14/05/2026 07:19

PJ98 · 14/05/2026 07:04

An afternoon tea is not a substantial meal. I've had some afternoon teas where I've not finished it, but more that I'm sick of cake by the end of it. The savoury part is only a few sandwiches.

I'd go for the buffet, but even then I'd personally expect a sit down meal at a wedding, especially if I've had to travel on a weekday and it starts early so I've had to have breakfast really early.

I'd think someone had cheaped out having a weekday wedding without proper food - at my expense there, including my expense of hunger.

I'm not being mean, you've asked for opinions and you'll have noticed a few people have mentioned about not feeling fed at weddings. Luckily some people wouldn't mind, so maybe your family and friends fall in that camp. Then you're grand.

If you’d have said you’d expect a sit down meal then I’d think that was fair enough and would taken it on board. It was the ‘mini scone’ comment I found unnecessary when I’d made it clear that volume wise there would be a decent amount of food, even if it’s not to everyone’s taste. It would be much easier if I shared the menu for the afternoon tea, but I’d rather not share what the venue is in case people start sharing other suggestions with me and complicating things!

I think it’s partly my fault as I said in my opening post about budget. I don’t want to spend a lot, which is why I am considering an informal day time thing, but this is not a cheap venue! If when I speak to people in person they don’t seem enthused then we will do a standard all day affair with a sit down meal and a DJ in the evening etc but it won’t be at this place.

OP posts:

DappledThings · 14/05/2026 07:24

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 14/05/2026 07:19

If you’d have said you’d expect a sit down meal then I’d think that was fair enough and would taken it on board. It was the ‘mini scone’ comment I found unnecessary when I’d made it clear that volume wise there would be a decent amount of food, even if it’s not to everyone’s taste. It would be much easier if I shared the menu for the afternoon tea, but I’d rather not share what the venue is in case people start sharing other suggestions with me and complicating things!

I think it’s partly my fault as I said in my opening post about budget. I don’t want to spend a lot, which is why I am considering an informal day time thing, but this is not a cheap venue! If when I speak to people in person they don’t seem enthused then we will do a standard all day affair with a sit down meal and a DJ in the evening etc but it won’t be at this place.

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Don't worry OP. There was a long thread here earlier this year where the OP mentioned an afternoon tea for her wedding and despite listing in full the varied sweet and savoury and vegetarian etc options it would include there were still posters falling over themselves to completely ignore it and announce that afternoon tea is a terrible idea and everyone hates it because there are only a handful of tiny cakes and everyone knows that.

For some reason the words afternoon tea seem to trigger some people!

Original poster

TheLadyOfWinterfell · 14/05/2026 07:25

Moonnstarz · 14/05/2026 07:18

I think this sounds lovely.

I think the only thing you might need to be aware of is you mention other friends being teachers, so doing it in any school holiday means they might not be around and if a good holiday deal came up they would go for that rather than your wedding.
Same with any guests with school aged children, they are likely to prioritise holidays over your wedding.

That is an excellent point about teachers potentially being away as it’s the only time they can go, thank you! We are hoping to get it booked asap, so hopefully that will be enough notice. Most of the teachers are quite close friends or family, so we’ve already floated rough dates with them.

OP posts:

SusanChurchouse · 14/05/2026 07:37

It sounds like it might work well in your specific set of circumstances. And you seem to be considering your guests’ needs quite keenly which is nice to read.

The only 2 weddings I’ve ever had to decline have been on a Thursday and a Sunday. For both I was working as a teacher. I couldn’t get time off for the Thursday one, and the Sunday one was a distance away and I was working next day. She was also a teacher but she worked in a different area with different holidays.

AltitudeCheck · 14/05/2026 08:26

Sounds lovely. Hotels are often much cheaper on a Sunday night which may make travelling for a Monday wedding easier for guests. If you're planning an afternoon do eople are free to stay sober and drive home Monday evening to minimise the days off.

Changingplace · 14/05/2026 08:32

DappledThings · 14/05/2026 07:24

Don't worry OP. There was a long thread here earlier this year where the OP mentioned an afternoon tea for her wedding and despite listing in full the varied sweet and savoury and vegetarian etc options it would include there were still posters falling over themselves to completely ignore it and announce that afternoon tea is a terrible idea and everyone hates it because there are only a handful of tiny cakes and everyone knows that.

For some reason the words afternoon tea seem to trigger some people!

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Agreed, I have no idea why people are so insistent that afternoon tea isn’t possibly substantial and a buffet is, when it’s literally just how it’s labelled and afternoon tea can include all kinds of savoury items and isn’t always just a fairy cake and a cucumber sandwich 😂

People seem completely unable to understand that the menu for an afternoon tea can totally be adapted too and it more describes the way it’s served than exactly what’s on the menu.

TheSoapyFrog · 14/05/2026 12:55

If people don't seem enthused, ignore them! Don't change what you want to do! I know I said I wasn't a fan of afternoon teas, but if I was invited to a wedding and there was an afternoon tea, the bride and groom certainly wouldn't ever know I was disappointed. I'd tell them it was lovely and I really enjoyed it.