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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How to offer to pay for Disney

140 replies

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 09:22

Long story short we went to Disney couple of years ago - kids wanted to go back so will be going for two weeks in October half term.

Sister's kids are desperate to go, but as a family it's out of their budget. We have a great relationship with sister and BIL, but don't want to offend them (well him I know sister would be delighted)

How do we go about offering, I was thinking probably speak with her first?

OP posts:
coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 13:16

shhblackbag · 13/05/2026 13:15

Agree. It's very kind, but I would feel so awkward.

But it seems your sister is happy, so that's great.

Edited

I know my sister defo wont, it's just husband who we have a great relationship with we didn't want to offend.

OP posts:
Xante · 13/05/2026 13:42

Just for my own nosiness how much would this cost?

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 13:45

Xante · 13/05/2026 13:42

Just for my own nosiness how much would this cost?

The thing is with Disney there is such a difference in price depending how you do it, that it's almost impossible to cost up.

OP posts:
PurpleThistle7 · 13/05/2026 13:50

I wouldn’t frame it as a Xmas or birthday gift as then the cousins will be super aware of the disparity. I’d just be super honest - my kids would love to have their cousins there and I think it would be so much more fun with some more adults around. Would you like to come with us? Our treat and no strings. You don’t want it set it up that your kids will expect something similar from them for Christmas, I’d keep it totally separate.

And honestly I would struggle to accept this ‘and’ struggle to keep up with just the daily costs so have a think about how to make it totally stress free for them. If their kids are thirsty or want a souvenir and you’re getting for your own kids… then what? That would be a challenge for me already but I’d feel so uncomfortable saying no all the time if you’re saying yes to your kids.

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 13:51

PurpleThistle7 · 13/05/2026 13:50

I wouldn’t frame it as a Xmas or birthday gift as then the cousins will be super aware of the disparity. I’d just be super honest - my kids would love to have their cousins there and I think it would be so much more fun with some more adults around. Would you like to come with us? Our treat and no strings. You don’t want it set it up that your kids will expect something similar from them for Christmas, I’d keep it totally separate.

And honestly I would struggle to accept this ‘and’ struggle to keep up with just the daily costs so have a think about how to make it totally stress free for them. If their kids are thirsty or want a souvenir and you’re getting for your own kids… then what? That would be a challenge for me already but I’d feel so uncomfortable saying no all the time if you’re saying yes to your kids.

To be clear my sister and her husband are not poor, far from it. Buying toys, a few meals etc won't be an issue at all.

OP posts:
beasmithwentworth · 13/05/2026 13:59

How lovely! I wish you were my sister! I do know what you mean about how men in particular can be. If he does get funny then tell your sister to tell him to put their kids in the middle of the situation - what’s the most important thing here? The DCs not his pride.

If my ex and I disagree on something then we both put the DCs at the centre of the decision and we largely end up agreeing as we both want what’s best for them.

He’s an adult and can get over any pride issues he may have. Then - great let’s get on with the planning then, please don’t stress about money. We are assuming you can afford 0 (or whatever) and as long as you are ok with that then let’s not talk / worry about it again and get on with the planning. We just happen to be in a position to do this and I know you’d do the same. End of.

And I can’t think why someone would think this was a stealth boast. Jeez.

PurpleThistle7 · 13/05/2026 14:11

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 13:51

To be clear my sister and her husband are not poor, far from it. Buying toys, a few meals etc won't be an issue at all.

That makes it much simpler! I am just always super conscious that sometimes 'little things' aren't that little. What my friend spent on a few wee toys at Disney blew my mind!

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 14:12

PurpleThistle7 · 13/05/2026 14:11

That makes it much simpler! I am just always super conscious that sometimes 'little things' aren't that little. What my friend spent on a few wee toys at Disney blew my mind!

Oh it's scandalous, and you know you can get the Princess outfit for half the price online - but it doesn't have the same magic as buying it underneath the Cinderella castle - and I suspect Disney are fully aware of that!

OP posts:
FLOR123 · 13/05/2026 14:28

Xante · 13/05/2026 13:42

Just for my own nosiness how much would this cost?

I will be honest, it can be a very expensive holiday and I'm well aware that a lot of people will go once and that's it. But my girls and I absolutely love it there, I don't spend money on much else, don't smoke or drink, don't go out a lot throughout the year, don't have expensive hobbies etc, I work from home so my car costs are low (no parking and low fuel costs over the year). So for me it is worth it.

We went in November, stayed at one of the moderate level Disney resorts and also 1 night in a Universal hotel. Had Universal park tickets, Epic Universe tickets, obviously the Disney park tickets, Disney Dining Plan.

For 3 of us I paid around £2500 for flights with Virgin, Disney hotel, tickets and dining plan was just under £5k, Universal tickets for the original parks and Epic Universe and hotel for 1 night was £2258. Christmas party tickets came to around £500. This was for 10 days in November.

Then we took around £4000 spending money. I'll be honest, it sounds a lot for 10 days, considering we had the meal plan so already had most food paid for, but by the last few days of the holiday I was panicking a bit that I was going to run out of money! I spent more than I expected on things like Ubers to off Disney places, meals that weren't included on our meal plan and then a few gifts & souvenirs.

There are cheaper resorts on Disney, hotels off Disney are even cheaper again and you can save money in other ways, don't go to the Universal parks (or don't go to Disney, depending on personal choice), eat out less if you stay in accommodation that has cooking facilities etc. For me, cooking on holiday is a no because I hate cooking anyway, so definitely don't want to be cooking on holiday 😂. We did go to Walmart on our first day and spent about $200 on things like cookie packs, snack size Pringles tubes, bottles of water, coke and juice, plus a few other bits. That way we didn't have to spend money or meal plan credits on those items while we were in the parks.

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 16:11

He has agreed, and is very grateful!

Booking tomorrow.

Thank you all.

OP posts:
incognito1991 · 13/05/2026 17:33

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 16:11

He has agreed, and is very grateful!

Booking tomorrow.

Thank you all.

Oh I’m so happy for you, the children will all have such fond memories of the trip because of your generosity

TeaPot496 · 13/05/2026 17:38

Yikes. Not a lot of sisters would permit their sister to spend ££££s on them for a hol without feeling guilty the whole break! The portions are nothing like they used to be..

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 17:39

TeaPot496 · 13/05/2026 17:38

Yikes. Not a lot of sisters would permit their sister to spend ££££s on them for a hol without feeling guilty the whole break! The portions are nothing like they used to be..

portions?

OP posts:
TeaPot496 · 13/05/2026 17:44

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 17:39

portions?

Food portions, in the parks. We went last year. Absolutely shocking rip off.

previouslyknownas · 13/05/2026 18:24

Maybe frame it as your kids want your cousins to come

and it would be lovely for all of them. Making memories that sort of thing

not on the same scale but I often pay for my son and his partner to come on holiday with us
they don’t have any kids though but I like to spend time with them

i say we are going to xxx or yyyy would you like to join us

normally give them a choice of 2 /3 countries
and say that I can afford to pay up to £££ for them and ask them to pick a hotel and resort they would like it’s always AI so no worries about food and drinks

they normally do a week or 10 days and we do 2 weeks

Oblahdeeoblahdoe · 13/05/2026 18:27

What a lovely sister and brother in law you are. Have a fantastic time

previouslyknownas · 13/05/2026 18:28

Web I took my sister and niece to Disney a few years ago for a week we did a meal plan

this was at Disney land Paris and we stayed at the main Disney Hotel
we had breakfast lunch and dinner inc
and lunch and dinner were character meals every time

also had snacks included

got bloody sick of mini mouse Interupting my meals by the end of the week

WonsWoo · 13/05/2026 18:29

I’m so pleased they have accepted and what a nice change to read about a lovely non toxic situation where someone is able to do something nice for their family without guilt and motives and drama.

I hope you all have a great time 😊

bluejewels · 13/05/2026 18:32

That's very kind of you OP. Hope you all have a fab time!! (I'm jealous...... room for one more? 😂)

Storminthesky · 13/05/2026 19:01

What a wonderful thing for you to do, I hope you all have an amazing time OP!

PloddingAlong21 · 13/05/2026 19:03

Speak to your sister privately and let her manage the husband.

It’s awesome and most parents would not want to deprive their child of any experience out of pride. Let her handle the management of BIL

Chilly80 · 13/05/2026 19:11

Xante · 13/05/2026 13:42

Just for my own nosiness how much would this cost?

Family of 4 for 2 weeks about £15k

whatcanthematterbe81 · 13/05/2026 19:15

We did something similar and told a bit of a porky, said we won some money 😬. Worked a treat tho and they didn’t feel awkward, or didn’t act or anyway

youalright · 13/05/2026 19:17

TeaPot496 · 13/05/2026 17:38

Yikes. Not a lot of sisters would permit their sister to spend ££££s on them for a hol without feeling guilty the whole break! The portions are nothing like they used to be..

Why? For all we know op is a billionaire and the cost of Disney is a drop in the ocean to her. If for e.g. i won the lottery I would want to pay family members mortgages, take them on holiday etc etc and id actually be a bit annoyed if they said no and acted a martyr about it. No fun being rich if everyone around you is poor and won't do anything with you.

TakeALookAtTheseSwatches · 13/05/2026 19:20

coulditbeme2323 · 13/05/2026 16:11

He has agreed, and is very grateful!

Booking tomorrow.

Thank you all.

How lovely, hope you have the best time 😊