To think some women could lift heavier in the gym?

[Ilostallthepens]

I go to a strength training class a few times a week. It’s almost always all women, class size is about 15. I’m not especially strong or experienced at lifting weights but I notice I’m always lifting the heaviest (sometimes by a long way) than every other person there. I’m also working to my maximum capacity for the 8-12 reps we’re doing. I’m huffing and puffing and sweating doing bicep curls with an 8kg dumbbell in each hand and I look over and the woman next to me is lifting a couple of 2kg dumbbells with no visible effort at all. I see this in a lot of the women there. They don’t seem to push themselves to their limit or even that close to it. I’m talking about women a similar age to myself that have been going to the gym for at least as long as me. I get some people may not want to push themselves to their max effort for whatever reason, eg. an injury, but I’m seeing lots of women seemingly not putting in half the amount of effort that they seem capable of and over a long period of time. So this makes me think the reason must be they don’t believe they are capable of lifting heavier, or they don’t want to lift to their max ability for some reason. Why do you think this is? Have you experienced this? Do you not work to max capacity in the gym? If not, why not?

The idea that people are watching and judging what I do in the gym really really fucks me off to be honest. Just leave people alone.

No, it's really not. Your example is more akin to them attending but sitting out and gossiping for half the class.

They're getting what they want out of it.

And why do you assume they have any more need or desire to lift to the outer extent of their range than you do to learn another language?

People like you are exactly why half the population thinks gyms are full of insufferable weirdos. Imagine paying money to attend a strength class and then spending the entire time conducting a psychological investigation into why strangers aren’t suffering theatrically enough for your approval ... grow up.

Fine but the op was slagging other women for lifting for tone. Any exercise will give tone. A light weight will aid that

Some of us have to lift heavy things (people!) in our daily lives and come to the gym knowing that if we don’t keep enough in the tank for later in the day life gets very difficult.

I quite often go to the gym and don't push myself that much. Here are some reasons why:

• I haven't been for a week or two (normally go 2x a week but often have gaps) and I know if I do a lot I'll be sore
• The gym isn't the only exercise I do, I also do another sport, that I don't want to be too sore for
• I'm tired or otherwise cba and I know its better to half arse the gym than not go at all
• I've tweaked something somewhere and it hurts (this seems to happen fairly often - not from the gym itself but other parts of life!)
• I'm focusing on good form before adding weight

Right? It's hard enough to go to the gym, especially when you're out of shape, without having to worry about people judging you for not doing enough.

Oh dear - where do I start here..

Science first: lifting heavy all the time isn’t smart on so many levels - from ligament/tendon overload to cycle changes in females to plateauing. Lifting heavy without building up to increased weights by adjusting all the other levers such as good form, TUT in eccentric movement and increasing stability work you’ll most likely get injured or fatigue eventually. Muscles adjust quicker to heavier weights than ligaments and tendons.

Google DUP Training to get an idea of smarter training variations.

As PPs said: focus on your own workouts- you sound like you look down on people who lift less than you or put „less effort into their training“ (in your eyes - leave them alone! You’re not in their shoes, have no idea what’s going on in their lives. They made the effort to attend a class.

Pat yourself on the back and swim in your own lane.

I could always lift heavier - I don't understand this trend to have really overly muscular bodies - it's really not attractive in either men or women.

OP, I’m sure you could run a lot faster if you put some actual effort into training. You could probably up your distance too, if you weren’t wasting all your time fanning about on weights. I bet your flexibility isn’t as good as it could be if you focused on stretching properly. And I doubt your core is as strong as it could be.

There is always something to criticise. Tim’s really none of your business how other people choose to exercise.

I do agree OP - people in my pump class have never increased the weight in all the years we've both been attending.

Can't see the point of going tbh but I guess I'm not paying their membership so who cares really?

Do you mind me asking if you are taking Alendronic Acid?

Maybe for some people going to the gym at all is a challenge. I am recently in that category for various health issues/a chronic condition. You wouldn't know it to look at me i don't think but I'm now in pain and quite weak.

But I agree with PPs, put your beak away!

Have you ever considered minding your own business?

Also, getting bulky is not a particular concern for me but nor is it something I'm actively aiming for.

But after hitting the gym regularly, mostly training legs and core with a relatively small amount of shoulders/arms/upper back, I bulked up enough that a lot of my tops don't fit me any more. I don't look obviously muscly but I have had to pretty much buy a new wardrobe, and a lot of what I haven't replaced because it still technically fits doesn't really look good any more because its a bit tight. And its because I've gained muscle not fat. And I haven't really focused on my upper body at all (was rehabbing a lower back and knee injuries) so its been fairly incidental.

I’m not judging, I’m trying to understand something that I don’t understand. You do need to ask a few questions to try to understand something. How is anyone supposed to learn otherwise? Why do people on MN always try and shut people down for being curious about something or accuse them of being judgmental/horrible/jealous/pathetic etc etc. I’m just trying to understand something. There’s a lot of nastiness on here and it smacks of people with very unhappy lives. Honestly, people with happy lives are not nasty to strangers on the internet. So you may want to keep that in mind

I do. And Evacal.

I’m not distracted or judging

The very title of your thread:

To think some women could lift heavier in the gym?

You are so judging @Ilostallthepens. This is nothing about 'wondering' and absolutely everything about judging other women. Stop trying to pretend otherwise.

Yeah but that won't tone. You would also find it very hard to build muscle

Ha! You could have been judging my mate that I went to the gym with last week. She lifted only light weights. In the meeting of the main because two days later, she did an ultramarathon and ran 50 fucking miles. Yet, she wouldn't have judged you doing park run or a measly marathon.

Perhaps it takes effort and they make it look easy.

Your attitude is the reason some women don't even walk through the door of a gym.

Your aims at the gym may not be the same as others - tell us what you want to achieve and we can help?

Some women have had their pelvic floor shot to pieces by pregnancy n childbirth. Whilst you can support it you can’t really reverse. Prolapse with kegels and are advised not to lift really heavy weights.

OP, you are the person who starts threads asking why other women are so weak, lazy and pathetic, and from your other thread, why women are such slags.

Do you really not understand that this is how you are coming across to everyone?

You literally been nasty to strangers on the Internet with your questions.

Because they don't want to is a good enough answer.