To think some women could lift heavier in the gym?

[Ilostallthepens]

I go to a strength training class a few times a week. It’s almost always all women, class size is about 15. I’m not especially strong or experienced at lifting weights but I notice I’m always lifting the heaviest (sometimes by a long way) than every other person there. I’m also working to my maximum capacity for the 8-12 reps we’re doing. I’m huffing and puffing and sweating doing bicep curls with an 8kg dumbbell in each hand and I look over and the woman next to me is lifting a couple of 2kg dumbbells with no visible effort at all. I see this in a lot of the women there. They don’t seem to push themselves to their limit or even that close to it. I’m talking about women a similar age to myself that have been going to the gym for at least as long as me. I get some people may not want to push themselves to their max effort for whatever reason, eg. an injury, but I’m seeing lots of women seemingly not putting in half the amount of effort that they seem capable of and over a long period of time. So this makes me think the reason must be they don’t believe they are capable of lifting heavier, or they don’t want to lift to their max ability for some reason. Why do you think this is? Have you experienced this? Do you not work to max capacity in the gym? If not, why not?

Good for you! Bravo!

So, from your posting history, you're judging women not only in the gym but also in the bedroom.

Nice.

I would agree with you that they probably could. They are probably aware that they could. And yet they have chosen not to. So you must draw your own conclusions. Or mind your own business, whichever.

I don’t agree with OP (let everyone make their own decision about how they exercise) but this is completely incorrect.

Toning is building muscle, and progressive overload is how it’s done. Big weights don’t result in ‘bulk’ (OP is only talking about 8kg weights anyway). (I strength train).

Well mainly I think what the fuck’s it got to do with you?

How does what other women are lifting impact you? Do you want a medal? Mind your own business and do your own workout while they do theirs. You sound insufferable.

I use 12.5kgs for bicep curls now. Should I judge those who use 8 kgs like you?

Just mind your own business and focus on building your own strength.

Couldn't you say that about anything?

Why do people settle for speaking only one language when they could challenge themselves by learning two, or even three?

Why do some people go out with frizzy hair when they could challenge themselves by learning how to do a professional blow dry?

Why do some people play only one instrument when they could challenge themselves by learning a new one?

Why do some people run for fun or fitness when they could challenge themselves by going faster or farther.

The list of why don't people is probably endless. Short answer, because they're happy or have different goals or don't want to, and are not there to please you.

FYI, yes this was commonly repeated, esp in the past, but it's not actually true. Women, with lower testosterone, have to work incredibly hard to build muscle bulk. You can lift to your max/to failure and you won't appreciably bulk up. And definition is a function of body composition, so yes you can get some by lifting, but it's generally more affected by diet than exercise.

First rule of going to the gym - don’t judge others.

So what results do these women want by lifting a weight that (by the looks of it, obviously I can’t know for sure) doesn’t provide any kind of resistance, so therefore doesn’t work their muscles at all? What result are they looking for by doing that?

Why are you watching other people OP? And lol at using 8s thinking it's a flex. It's not very nice to criticise, is it?

Some people do heavy weights low reps. Some light and high reps. Focus on your own training.

If you're doing 12 reps with an 8 you need to go up a weight or 2 though. Try some 10s.

And ffs in general we're not men. Stop being scared of heavy weights. You're not going to turn into the hulk.

Who cares? Who knows? Why do you care?

It's honestly none of your business. Stop judging.

It doesn't matter. It doesn't affect you.

you could ask that about any form of exercise. Or actually any activity at all.
If someone does parkrun, why don't they push themselves and run a marathon?
If they enjoy reading romantasy, why not read Russian literature?
If someone enjoys playing chess with friends why don't they enter tournaments and become a grand master?

Because they don't want to! and it's none of your business why.

What do you gain from being such a judgy patronising pick me on an anonymous forum.
i used to train in a predominantly men’s spit and sawdust gym and I could lift heavy weights and loved seeing the impact it had on my body.
sadly my body has given in to a horrible genetic condition and I can no longer train how I want to, in fact I can’t train at all because I have so little capacity.
Your stealth boast post is unnecessary, just find a different gym where people are more on your level so you don’t waste your workout time distracted worrying about ‘lots of women seemingly not putting in half the amount of effort that they seem capable of and over a long period of time’.

🙄

Ohhhhh. She’s that OP.

Judging other women for having more sexual partners than she approves of.

That was none of your business either, OP.

This makes zero sense. I only speak one language because I have no need or desire to speak another one. However, if I paid a hefty monthly fee to go to a Spanish class but spent half the class with my headphones on listening to music and missing half of what was being taught, wouldn’t you question why I bothered to go to the class at all? That’s a much more accurate analogy for this situation

again, why does it matter? You’ve been told by multiple people not to judge people at the gym and you’re still doing it - you’re a disgrace.

Yanbu
2kg is a waste of time. Might as well lift balloons.

Most women are not actually in a gym. Or ‘lifting weights’. They’re living a life. Reading, working, walking the dog, watching tv, travelling, shopping, gaming, eating, scrolling, seeing friends.

Perhaps you should get a life too?

I have rheumatoid arthritis and never push myself with weights because I know it would cause my joints to flare up, which could cause pain for days, which is very debilitating.
The purpose of doing any weight related exercise is to strengthen my muscles to support my joints. I can do that through more reps using lower weights.
However, I don't care if anyone is judging me. It doesn't cross my mind to do that in the gym, we're all there for our own reasons.

A lot of women are not educated about weightlifting op - as some of the responses here show.

That’s not a criticism- I wasn’t myself until I started proper training a year or so ago with a decent coach. I used to go to the gym and do pointless exercise because I didn’t know any better. But When I’d spent a year going to the gym a couple of times a week and still gained a stone (!) I decided it was time to get a decent coach!

So there’s a lot of people underestimating what weights they are capable of using and what they need to do to actually build muscle and strength (“toning” is just losing fat and building muscle)

A lot of people don’t realise that building muscle is the best way to lose fat because the more muscle you have the more calories your body burns even at rest.

There’s a lot of fear about getting “bulky” but in reality a woman is highly unlikely to become really bulky unless they really really tried to get bulky ….. I’ve been lifting heavy weights (like 90kg deadlift) 3 times a week for the past year and I’m fit looking but still very feminine looking and not bulky at all!! I’ve lost a stone and gained muscle - nothing bulky but my arms look toned now.

(And if course there may be some people who are deliberately lifting light due to injury or various other reasons.)

I’m not distracted or judging. It’s just something I’ve been wondering about as I find it a bit puzzling so thought someone here might be able to shed some light on it. I think it’s fairly normal to wonder about things, but I forgot, this is MN, where you can’t ask any kind of question without judgement and backlash 🙄

Maybe……maybe they don’t want to look like you?

🤷‍♀️