AIBU to think I shouldn't have visited the Science Museum in a wheelchair?

[Hadaweenamechange]

Interested to know if I made a bad choice and need to consider more carefully where I visit in future?

I'm a wheelchair user, using a smallish, lightweight carbon-fibre power chair in the scenario described here. I visited the Science Museum in London yesterday with my DH. He had to be in London fairly early in the morning and then again later in the evening, with around 9 hours to spare in between. As it was a bank holiday, we arranged for me to go with him so we could spend the day together, while we had the rare chance of a few hours off at the same time.

Despite having lived in London for many, many years (we no longer do), neither of us had ever been to the Science Museum, so we decided to visit yesterday.

My, what a mistake! First of all, I realise it was a bank holiday, and I know the museum's target audience is likely to be families with children, so maybe going yesterday wasn't the smartest idea, but I wasn't prepared for just how difficult it was to navigate.

In the space of 3 hours:

• I clipped the heels of at least 5 people with the front of my chair (adults and kids), because, despite my best efforts to maintain a generous distance between me and anyone in front of me, I can't stop as quickly as someone on foot, and if you stop abruptly, I can't always stop in time

• As a result of the above, I was glared at, tutted at, stared at and on one occasion, I was pretty sure I was sworn at - it wasn't in English, but I felt the wrath in whatever the language was!

• On 3 separate occasions, I was careered into at considerable speed by over-exuberant, out-of-control children. One ran straight into me with such force that he literally landed face down on my lap. One hit his shin on my footplate, and the third one hurtled round a blind bend and ricocheted off the side of my chair. To give them credit, the accompanying adults of two of them were apologetic, but the parent/guardian of the one who hit his leg actually wanted me to go with them to find a member of staff so they could officially report it as an incident and have it recorded in the accident book, 'just in case'. Just in case of what, I'm not sure, as there was no visible mark or bleeding. The same adult also suggested that it wasn't the most ideal place to be in a wheelchair with so many children around.

• If you've visited, you'll know the museum is laid out over 4 floors. There are many sets of stairs scattered around and plenty of lifts, all of which have signs indicating that priority should be given to the elderly, pushchairs, and the less able. I was really surprised by the queues for the lifts whenever we needed to use them, and I'd guess that around 90% of those waiting were families with older children or tweens, with no obvious impediments. Not once did anyone offer to let waiting pushchair owners go in front of them, and the force with which some of the children were pushed towards the lift doors by their adults, as the doors opened, was not pretty to watch. I actually don't give a rat's bum how long I wait for a lift, after all, I'm sitting down. But to encourage your older children to push in front of parents with toddlers and pushchairs is really shitty imo.

It made for a not-very-pleasant few hours, and I felt a bit sad and crap afterwards. What do you think, wise MN'ers? Do I need to pick my venue with more care next time, or should these places be available for all to enjoy without barriers? Granted, it's been a fair few years since I owned children who required parental supervision, but I honestly don't recall ever letting our DC run rampant the way some of them were yesterday.

This is all on the parents OP (poss exception for the ricocheter- sounds reasonably unpredictable).

Not you. Other people's bad manners.

I'm sorry your day out was ruined by thoughtless twonks, and no, it's not incumbent upon you to wait till it's quieter to visit; people should have been more thoughtful and aware!

My DD was using a wheelchair for the first time when visited a Sea Life centre recently. I was shocked by the lack of consideration of many other visitors.

I said you are being unreasonable purely because people always walk and then come to a stop, they aren’t cars with a stopping distance. If you know you have a stopping distance you need to give people more room.

Clipping someone in the ankles is going to hurt. Whether it was an accident or not, apologise and give more space.

Bank holiday at a museum in London sounds horrendous, I think you were brave! Sorry you had a shit time.

I voted YABU because I thought you were asking if you were unreasonable to have visited.

anyway, of course not. Wheelchair users are as entitled to be out and about as anyone and people not letting you have priority for lifts are selfish arseholes. The parent wanting to fill in an accident report is some
sort of neurotic drama llama.

I’ve been to the science museum in a wheelchair.

yes the queues for the lifts are pretty insane. It does make it hard to get about:

I also was bumped into by children running around.

my kids are pretty good at “defending” my space when moving around (they move with me) but even so yes the sheer number of kids who were running around and expected all adults to move out of their way was tricky.

I have speed controls on my wheelchair and notch it to lowest possible speed in these situations - I also have a very loud voice and use it almost constantly by saying “wheelchair coming through please watch out wheelchair near you” but even so it’s amazing how many people walk straight into you.

my wheelchair is covered in neon yellow as well for visibility.

yeah, it’s not the easiest place to go in a wheelchair.

The science museum on a bank holiday Monday would be absolutely max rammed. I guess you’d just need to apply the same criteria to that as to, say, hugely busy shopping centre on first day of the sales 20 years ago before everyone shopped online. Kids and families should def be careful and giving space to people but it will be a tough place for that as it’s going to be so crowded. No way they should be tutting at you - that’s unacceptable under any circumstances.

I remember it being a lot of hassle with multiple flights of stairs too. And that was just us lugging a pushchair round years ago so obviously easier for us than you (but that’s why I remember the stairs and crowded lifts). I haven’t been back since and ours are old teens now.

Also a wheelchair user, and I hear your pain, its particularly difficult when people don’t control their DC as you feel responsible, as the adult to not hit them

I dont like the new layout of the science museum at all. The space bit gets REALLY busy so everyone gets stuck in that corner (it used to be more spread out) and the lifts are particularly chaotic.

It was better when they had free kids' stuff in the basement where kids could let off steam but be out of the way, now you have to pay for that bit kids seem to go feral on the ground floor.

Yabu to think any of this is something you should have to adapt your life for!!!

The onus for all of the incidents you describe is on the fully able bodied folk who chose to be deliberstely ignorant of your presence and then try to blame you. I believe the appropriate term is gaslighting.

My darling best friend was blind and a wheelchair user, she passed early last year but she never allowed her disabilities to limit her, please don't limit yourself. You have just as much right to go anywhere and do anything as everyone else does.

I am so sorry you were subjected to such twatish behaviour.

I may or may not have gotten myself into a lot of bother for calling people out who deliberately didn't see my friend. There is a very clear way to differentiate between a genuine accident and a deliberate one. The way someone behaves afterwards.

I know this isn’t at all the point of this thread, but I would highly recommend Winchester Science Centre - huge and spacious and far better for all the hands on exhibits than the science museum in London imo.

I think you would enjoy it more if it was quieter. That doesn't mean you should have to change your plans.

I'm confused by the voting options but I think you are unreasonable to think that you should not have gone. People need to learn how to share space with wheelchairs.

I expect as it was so crowded people were crowding around the wheelchair so lack of stopping distance not her fault.

I can recommend the V and A as pretty wheelchair friendly, also has a bloody good cafe.

not the natural history museum, as bad as the science museum.

British Museum also pretty good although their lifts are pretty hidden and very slow.

I voted you are being unreasonable in the sense you that you should be able to go where you want and shouldn't be made to feel constrained as to which places you can access by the actions of others.

I can see how practically it might have been wise to visit on a less busy day for your own sake (people going to people) but of course you absolutely have every right to be there.

The lifts thing would have driven me absolutely insane. I had a massive bug bear about this when I needed to use them - so many people without wheelchairs/pushchairs/obvious impediments constantly clogging up lifts making life so much more difficult for people that actually can’t use the stairs. Gah!

The last time I made the mistake of going to the Science museum in a school holiday I had to avoid getting run over by kids on scooters! Who lets their kids ride scooters in a fucking museum?

I always told my kids when they were young that lift priority was for those using wheelchairs or pushing prams, and that we were perfectly capable of using the stairs or escalators, so that's what we'd do.

The Science Museum is hellishly overcrowded on a bank holiday.
The lifts are tiny and inadequate. I am physically fit but still don't love schlepping up four flights of stairs.

One ran straight into me with such force that he literally landed face down on my lap. One hit his shin on my footplate, and the third one hurtled round a blind bend and ricocheted off the side of my chair.

This is extreme behaviour and I'm so sorry it all happened to you during one visit OP.

I work in a museum and feel like I'm turning blue in the face telling parents/carers to stop their children from running.

Not only is it dangerous for other users, but the galleries are full of glass cabinets, so parents should definitely stop their kids from racing around.

After a particularly miserable visit to the NHM last May half term (on a wet day) I vowed never to set foot in any of the main museums or galleries on weekends / BH or school holidays ever again.

It was dog eat dog!! We left pretty quickly as it was just unbearable.

I'm sorry you had a shit time OP.

Science museum on a bank holiday is always going to be horrendous - whether you're a wheelchair user or not. Of course you have as much right to be there as anyone else, but most able- bodied people would also avoid going there on a bank holiday so I think it's a case of accepting bank holidays are hellish in those kinds of places and then making your own mind up whether it's worth it on that day or you can visit at another time i.e. the same decision everyone else has to make.

In theory YANBU. In practice YABU. All of those museums are absolute hell on a bank holiday and it was pre-determined to be a shit show. I’d give them a swerve as an able bodied person. Next time go on a Monday in February- it will be much better.

I am sorry it was shit and of course you should be able to go anywhere you want and be treated with considération Even on crowded days. I think it’s a Little unfair to focus the question around the science museum specifically, though. It doesn’t sound like there was anything specifically problematic about this venue, the staff, or the facilities. Your question is really about the général public and their lack of considération in crowds?

I was at the science museum recently with a pram, and that was frustrating enough. DH and I discussed at the time how awful it must be for a wheelchair user.

Considering how few lifts there are, I couldn’t believe how inconsiderate some people are. I know some people have hidden disabilities, but I struggled to believe entire 8 person families were incapable of taking the stairs.