Am I being too stingy with pocket money?

[Helenmum3]

DD is primary age and we give her £80 a month. I was with friends with similar age kids at the weekend and each of them give their own kids a higher amount.

We aren’t particularly well off, certainly not ‘Mumsnet rich’ but I’d say we are fairly average earners for this day and age. I earn about £50,000, DH nearer &75,000 with bonuses.

I thought £80 was fair personally?

Sorry, do we make her buy her own presents? What do you mean, she obviously gets presents from us for her birthday and Christmas.

I don’t think I’d describe us as well off, but that’s a different conversation altogether.

My almost £14 year old gets £25 a month from me and I buy him clothes, pay for activities etc. I’m a single parent. His dad doesn’t give him anything.

My primary aged children get £10 a week (on top of their activities etc) and they say they get more than their friends do so i'd say £80 is a lot.

I think it’s very much dependent on what she is purchasing etc. My 17yo gets £300 a month but has to use that for petrol, lunches and drinks out and socialising. Anything above that she has to do jobs to earn money.

the Pele saying they give kids £2 a week that’s fine for little kids I think. They can get sweets. But even magazines and books are more than that so it really does depends on what they are buying. When I was a kid on the mid 80s my picket money was quite generous as I used it for swimming and biting books from whsmiths. Both were activities that my parents wanted to encourage and I was only allowed to spend x amount on sweets. Even in the 90s when I got £60 a week in my part time job I spent most of it in WH Smith’s 😂🤷🏼‍♀️

£80 fucking quid a month? I know inflation is a thing but I was lucky to get that a year!

Our kids are 9&10
they don’t get pocket money, we give them money as rewards for when they’ve been really good/helpful. Roughly works out to be about £20-£40/m (but more if we know they are saving for something) they are both really good with their money after the initial spend it all on sweets etc.

When I was a kid I was expected to earn my pocket money by doing jobs in the house. There was a list of tasks on the inside of the cupboard door and each one was priced. If i missed one out I didnt get the full money for that week. It taught me discipline, responsibility and how to budget. I would not GIVE a child money. Rather I would give them the opportunity to earn it.

£80 a month for a primary school kid????

If you are stingy, I hate to see what I am.

Dd and ds get £20 a month, with potential to earn more if they do jobs. They are both primary school aged. £80 is absolutely mind boggling tbh.

@Helenmum3i think the question about presents was referring to her buying birthday presents for friends, not birthday presents for herself!

My teenagers get £2 per week pocket money, and the opportunity to earn more by washing cars, cooking, babysitting etc. They also get some pocket money from grandparents, but of the same order, not £80 per month!

That seems like a loads to me and certainly much more than my DC get.

My youngest (7) and only primary school age child gets £2.50 per week but obviously not at the age of socialising with friends yet.

My 13yo gets £7:50 per week but we will give her extra if she’s going to the cinema or shopping with friends.

My 17yo gets £12.50 per week but no extras on top as he also earns a bit.

They all get the same amount of money in their savings account each month on top of that.

YABU - £80 is a ridiculously large amount to give a primary school child. Do they earn it or is it just given? If given then you aren't instilling any work values and will raise a spoilt child. Clearly you socialise with similar parents.

I’d say thats a huge amount. My 9 year old gets £2 a week that he can augment by doing chores and helping out. And it can get deducted too. Now THAT’S probably stingy. Not £20 a week!

So glad it’s not just me thinking omfg at £80 and primary

and yes you both earn a lot !

im thinking about pocket money for mini blondes just 9. Was thinking maybe £10 a month

I don’t know what’s normal but def £80 isn’t !!

What? This can’t be real seriously?
My ten year old gets £20 a month and my 15 year old gets £40 a month and they actually have to do things for it!

Does your DD help around the house? That would influence things for me. If she isn’t really doing anything to help apart from things that relate to her (eg tidying her stuff in her room etc) then I would say that she is being spoilt by the method of giving so much.

Mine gets £100 a month. But he’s 14 and all his cinema trips, vinyls, general socialising comes out of that. I think £80 for a primary aged child is incredibly generous.

At primary school??? £80!!! Blimey, what does she need it for?

My kids didn't get any pocket money until they went to secondary as before then they were always with an adult and their costs were covered. My daughter (year 7) gets £10 a week and it often builds up as she can't think of much to spend it on. I think when my eldest got to about 14 or 15 we put it up to £20 although half of that was tied to picking up after himself, not using bad language etc so he didn't always get it all.

Perhaps I'm out of touch but I think it's plenty. In fact my son was always getting tapped by his mates to buy snacks etc because he always had more money than them.

Wow!! Mine get £3 a week. I felt that was not a lot but we pay for everything else for them anyway.

My 16yos get £40 a month. They don't think that is unreasonable.

Yabu definitely stingy ours gets £500 a month and where only average earners with a household income 500k

I guess we must be the most stingy parents then. My DC13 and DC9 only get £13 and £9 per month and we have a higher household income than OP. They do get £200 each a few times a year for special occasions. My DC dont really spend much and never ask for money. We pay for everything they need or want within reason.

What exactly is your DD expected to use the money for @Helenmum3?

DD14 gets £15 every Friday so £60 or £75 a month depending on how many weeks. That is for ice cream, sweets, Starbucks, occasional small wants in town like a hair clip/lip balm etc but she also saves and adds birthday/Christmas money for bigger things she wants randomly. We buy all her clothes and are quite generous though she has been known to buy extras she wants. If she’s going to the cinema etc I tend to send an extra £10 to cover the ticket.

Oh we also give her holiday money if we are away.

That’s a shit ton of money for a primary school kid. I didn’t even get that in sixth form back in 2013.