I’ve previously posted about my husband, his activities and trying to keep one Saturday a month spending time together, as he has his daughter every weekend day bar this Saturday, as well as time in the week, and has multiple hobbies on weekdays.
So yesterday was the Saturday. In the morning we took his elderly mother to the airport as she was going to visit her family. She was nervous and wanted help at the airport so my husband agreed to take her. I get on really well with his mother so I also went. We got back at 2pm.
He then asked me what I had planned. I said I was going to look for something for us to do, as I’d originally planned a day trip somewhere but was too late when we got back. I was looking on my phone and suggesting things to do, everything I said he said “I don’t mind”. Eventually we went somewhere and then got food. Got the impression all day he was tired/in a mood but didn’t say anything.
During the meal his brother called and said he’d felt left out of the airport trip and they needed to talk. Husband left me at the restaurant and went to his brothers for around 2 hours. I explicitly said to him “it’s not ideal but you’re being put in a difficult situation”. His brother and I don’t get along, and he’s been vile towards his mother, so I said along the lines of, he’s positioning himself as badly done to, but he’s created this situation himself.
husband got home around 7. We needed a weekly shop so we went to get it. We were laughing around the shop, all fine.
Around midnight after watching a series together, he snapped and said “you went on and on about this Saturday together, and what did we do? Went to a museum and had food?”
I said I didn’t want a grand plan, just time together. He said I asked you to plan something, that would have been nice for me. He got irritate, shouting and hitting his head. He said I should’ve planned something he’d enjoy, and I was in a mood because he had to go to his brothers, he said “I have to spend time with you in the week, at the weekend, all the time”
He was so angry. I said I didn’t plan anything as we were planning on going the airport, he said you’ve had weeks.
I left the room as the shouting came from nowhere and eventually cried myself to sleep.
Aibu? I was quieter after his brother rang because I think his brother creates drama and the family have to placate him. But I wasn’t moody with him, the evening carried on as usual when he came home. Aibu to not have planned a big elaborate day, and improvised on the day?