Thank god things didnt work out the way you wanted

[Ontobetterthings]

Anyone else relieved that something you really wanted didn't work out.

I was just reflecting and years ago I was so upset that I didnt get a promotion in a certain field and tried many times to move up. After the final time I completely gave up. I cried my eyes out for days and left and retrained to eventually a much better career with great prospects. I am just so relieved it did not work out. Aibu to think these things happen for a reason?

Yes! Dream job in Japan didn’t work out, led to meeting my husband.

I was devastated by not getting a job 3 years ago but last month the position disappeared and the person was made redundant so basically I would have been out of work at a time when the job market is awful in my field.

Yes a house we lost that I cried buckets over. It all turned out for the best as it was in the “wrong” side of the railway for our commutes, and had no scope for any improvement. There was no way it would have adapted to our growing family in the way that our house has.

Yeah. I made mistakes that actually turned out to be good decisions - firmly believe this xx

Yes, first marriage. The horrific divorce was so painful but with hindsight it was the best thing to happen and I’m so lucky to be out of that relationship and to have enjoyed my life so much after.

Yes, this happened to my sister just before the financial crisis in 2008.

She was really disappointed not to be offered a job with one of the banks that went under and instead got a job at a law firm.

LOTS!!

The first was a house I was desperate to buy when I was much younger. We were gazumped and although we bought another one, it was smaller and not as nice. And then 3 years after we bought, the first house had a murder happen almost directly outside it.

Going to live overseas when I was very young due to husband's circumstances. I really really didn't want to go, and on a personal level, I was very unhappy there. But basically I was really lucky in that I got a couple of work opportunities that got me into tech quite early on, which has been the bedrock of the academic work that I do now.

Cancer. After years of treatment, I used my 2nd chance to chase dream opportunities overseas that were the best experiences of my life.

Had my DC while living overseas but struggled to integrate with a baby so came back to the UK. Turned out, DC was fairly severely SEN and I would have hugely struggled to get any support for them, where I lived. So despite it being a gorgeous place to live, leaving worked out in the long run.

Learning to work online during covid. Allowed me to semi retire/become self employed. I now earn what I earned for 70 hour weeks in half that and have no boss.

Was once head hunted for a job that I hated. But that job gave me the experience for a new job, just 6 months after the hated one.

Lastly, my ex, who I was head over heels with. I really wanted to marry him but he wouldn't commit. Finally, I ended it and now I thank god daily that we didn't marry because he's become such a loser that I can't imagine being tied to him.

I very much think things have happened for very good reasons for the vast majority of my life. Think I must have a guardian angel!

A few years back I wanted so so much not to be married anymore. We separated for 9 months and reconciled. Every day I’m so grateful for him, for my life, most of all for being able to see my daughters every day. I learned that you can want (even need) something incredibly badly that isn’t good for you.

Really wanted to marry Tony Mortimer from East 17 so glad now that didn't happen.

A long, drawn out break up I was genuinely devastated over. It hurt almost physically at the time but was undoubtedly the best outcome for all concerned.

Hated my job. Grievances raised and many weeks of hell, started looking and was offered another but turned it down because the same day I’d also been given a treatment schedule for an illness. Stayed at my job for the flexibility and a few months later met my now best friend (and no longer work with the person who made my life hell, so it all worked out great!)

I believe everything is meant to be .

You dodged a bullet there. Didn’t his mate Brian manage to somehow run over himself with his own car?

Really enjoying reading this thread!
My contribution is that I moved abroad to do a PhD, and it went really badly. Terrible supervision, lots of technical problems, just lots going wrong. I had always been an academic high flier and this felt like a huge failure.
It took me more than 2 years longer than I was expecting to finish, and thank god it did, because in my last month before moving away (actually on a night out to celebrate finishing my thesis) I met my now husband. Ended up never leaving the country, and now we have a lovely life and a beautiful daughter. 😍

@HelloItsMeYourRobotVaccuum yeah that's right he did. I'm sure there was photos of Brian in the papers on crutches as he had driven over himself. Definitely dodged a bullet with Tony.

This is good to read. I’m absolutely at my lowest ebb, hopefully my luck will change like it has for those of you on this thread

Because he'd eaten a dodgy jacket potato and leant out of his car to be sick. But managed to accidentally run himself over instead.

we've all been there!

So many! Houses we’ve been gazumped on and been devastated about? We always found something far better.
Vile step mother. Awful as a child but gave me an excellent idea of what not to do and actually made me a much better SM when I became one.
Dream job, big salary. Horrific in a way that I just could never envisage but I learned so much about how NOT to do things, it actually benefitted me massively. It still makes me smile to think that those horrible, incompetent fuckers led me to where I am now. Everything for a reason 🥰

About 11 years ago,I met a man who treated me like shit but I really loved him

The final straw was when he cheated on me and picked her

I walked away (and cannot put into words how painful that was) and then promptly met dp

He treats me like a queen and I've never been so happy-10 years and counting

Top it all off,wed been together about a year when we saw mr cheat and the 'love of his life' walk past me in the street

Both looked miserable as sin-i really hope she kicked him to the curb and is living her best life without him

An absolutely devastating break up that I was convinced was the love of my life and nearly broke me led to my now DH. I have seen the ex since and I am so grateful that I am with my DH and not him.

When my work place was closing I didn't get the job in another parallel department and got made redundant instead. It worked out really well as I could pay off my mortgage with my redundancy pay and got to retrain in a much better job with great work life balance. If I had got the original transfer I'd probably still be working full time and hating every minute but too scared to quit.

Yes, I often look back and think that the negative experiences led me to where I am today so it was all worth it.

Nothing major, mostly broken hearts. There was the job I didn't get at an investment bank which went under 6 months later, so definitely dodged a bullet there. Or leaving a job I hated because of the manager without another job lined up, and being so stressed that I was doing the wrong thing and would end up destitute and without a job. I got the next job before my notice period was up, got a £10k pay rise, then went on to get 2 promotions in 3 years.

It all contributes to our life path... If we take a different path we end up with a different life. I met my DH at a house party that I almost didn't go to. I almost said no when he asked me on a date because I had recently broken up but decided that was only a short term relationship and what if this one could be something special so why throw it away because of the ex who was history and never meant much to me in the first place. We've been together 21 years and have 2 DC, so those two minor decisions would have resulted in a very different life path for me.

Many years ago I made a mess of my A levels and couldn't go to my first choice of uni and had to take up my insurance offer. I was gutted. But I loved my time there and met my husband. It really did turn out for the best.

We had to buy a house in a bit of a hurry for various reasons. It was smaller than we wanted and not in an ideal area with a pylon in view. We couldn’t get a mortgage on it due to the proximity of the pylon. We were quite disappointed and the estate agents broker tried to push to get us one. We then realised it would be hard to sell on and continued to look in a hurry and found a much better house in a nicer area a few days later. So happy and relieved that the other house fell through.

Same here, I hope your luck changes for the better soon. And mine too!

Hopeful thread, thanks op