To ask what poor theatre etiquette you’ve witnessed?

[AllaMova]

Admittedly, I had never experienced poor theatre etiquette until I saw Phantom of the Opera in the West End last week.

A woman next to me kept lunging forward and then flinging herself back in her seat throughout the performance, which was very distracting and made my seat shake each time. Then, she kept whispering to her companion.

A man kept kicking another man’s seat. I didn’t notice until the man in front turned around and told him off doing so. (Not that I blame him in the slightest!)

Another woman a few rows in front of me got her to text several times. An usher intervened, but she kept doing it.

Some people also arrived late and missed the start of the show and distracted everyone else in the process of finding their seats.

I can’t believe all of this happened during one single show. Until that point, I had been so lucky.

Woman behind me brought her young DD (maybe 5/6) to theatre to see Wicked. Child cried and whimpered throughout the whole show. I'd travelled interstate for it, and the experience was completely ruined.

Probably the most famous one was where a stand up comedian (Aus), stopped the show and told a a mother with a crying baby to leave & wouldn't start again until she'd gone. She caused a massive fuss nationally as she complained parents needed a night out, too! The unanimous response was to get a babysitter, or accept baby = restrictions.

My friend was the director. Smallish town where everyone knows each other.

You'd know if someone was using one of those though as they would have the theatre issued headset.

I used to work at Symphony Hall. Back in those days no food or drink whatsoever was allowed into the auditorium apart from a paper cup of water (a steward would get you one) or theatre issued (free back then) Sela cough sweets in special rustle proof wrappers.

Every time we sold a Magnum ice lolly we would warn the person buying that they were not allowed to take them into the auditorium and we were not allowed to sell at all after the 5 minute call.

How times have changed.

Local theatre groups talk to each other, or at least they do in my area where members of the production teams, bands, adult cast and also children go from group to group. One of the cast in one show may be the director in another and stage manager in the next.

I wonder how likely that child is to be cast in anything ever again.

Quadrophenia Ballet at Sadlers Wells.

The ballet company my daughter is on a programme with kindly provided tickets, so we had a row of children from 8-12 years old.

Behind us was a row of rather raucous ladies who were fans of The Who from the first time around. They kept talking incessantly through the entire performance, as though they were in their living room watching t.v.

towards the end of the second act, the protagonist is on the beach in dire and angsty mode. This is juxtaposed to the jollity of another group of beach-goers, the man of which was topless in tight shorts.

One of them screeched “Fwoar, look at that bod!” whilst her friends collapsed in gales of laughter around her.

Would have been audible to those on stage.

Otherwise, I can’t remember any really bad behaviour over the last few years - just the usual annoying rustling of food wrappers, for which the theatres really should take the blame for as they are the ones selling the sweets.

Once read about someone at the RAH getting a blow job during an Eric Clapton show and being removed.
I suppose the preshow message about phones etc should be updated to include no sexual acts of any type.

There will be stories about the ROH. No doubt 'escorts' will be involved esp at corporate events and cocaine will probably be rife (other drugs may be optional)

So long as they behave themselves during the performance, it doesn't really bother me what they get up to. If people started snorting lines or humping escorts in the middle of the show then I'd object. Actually, the snorting would probably be unobtrusive enough so I'd most likely let them crack on without complaint! Certainly preferable to rustling a crisp packet.

I think I'd marginally prefer a bottom in my face to a crotch actually, so I'm not with your mum on that one; but honestly, if you are really getting this close just stand up and let them pass.

An entire row of really shitfaced women who got up and danced to every song in dirty dancing the musical.

An entire row of drunken people who knew one of the queens in Six during a matinee performance. They were just so loud and raucous.

A granddad who had a grandchild on each knee which meant my view was completely blocked until I pointed this out to him.

a drunken couple who talked very loudly about their favourite songs and who were moved behind us as someone else had obviously complained about them!

Ugh. I’d hate to be sat near drunk people at the theatre!

Yes, nearly every gig I've been too there have been people talking all the way through, including some very expensive seats at Tottenham.

It costs us a fortune to go to gigs and I pay to hear the band. One hog in London three girls totally ignored the band and chatted shit all the way through...at least I could move away as standing but you can't really if sitting

My daughter was 11 at the time we first went to see Six - it was the 4pm showing rather than the evening one, as we’ve an hour at least to get to the bigger theatres and I just really didn’t expect there to be drunken folk in at that time!

What the actual feck. 🤮

I’d have ruined his theatre trip by drop kicking him up the aisle