AIBU to mention weight loss injections to an overweight male colleague?

[NoNewClothes]

Worked previously with this colleague in our early twenties and he was well built, but tall so not obviously overweight. We’ve now been working together in the same company for about 3 years and in the time I can’t help but see that he had put on considerable weight and is now probably in the morbidly obese range.

I know his wife to see but not really talk to (not that kind of work place). She has the look of a sporty fit slim type. He, like me, early 50s, teenage kids etc.

I know that speaking about weight issues to a spouse is mired in difficulty; from reading on threads here too that’s very much a no no. However I’m now on WLI myself after really struggling with my menopausal weight gain that led me to a bmi of over 30 and finding it so so hard to reverse the upward trend.

The reason I started? Speaking with female work colleagues who are also on mounjaro and had normalised it, plus coming on here and joining one of the many WLI threads.

This colleague is such a sweet guy, and I would just mention in passing that I’m on them - I would be subtle and kind but make it clear I’m available for advice without pushing it.

Reading the healthy life expectancy report out yesterday is prompting this.

or AIBU and only bring it up if he mentions his struggles (which he never does)

Maybe he can’t afford them.
Maybe he has other issues that means he can’t take them.
If he raises it, discuss it. Otherwise leave alone.

Dh made the I Am Legend comment about his office too 🤣

But talk / news reports etc. about weight loss injections is pretty much everywhere. (EDIT: and not just on mumsnet…)

He will definitely be aware of them if he’s obese!!

Most people who are overweight and are not on these drugs are already sick about hearing about them. Perhaps he has made a rational decision not to take them as he does not want to be taking drugs for the rest of his life.

Is this thread for real? I cannot believe it is.

The guy I've started seeing recently has put off taking WLI because he's needle phobic and meeting me and me talking about it openly has given him the boost to start, with me doing the injections.

But beyond that reasons I can't see anyone who needs to, wants to, isn't contraindicated and can afford to, having not started them already or be starting wli imminently.

So unless you're planning on doing his injections for him ever week, I'm not sure what assistance you plan to offer this man.

It’s none of your business. And you’re setting yourself up for a complaint to HR if you mention it to him. And rightly so.

I get the impulse, OP. WLI have really helped me too, and I tried them because others spoke about the benefits and normalised it.

That said, I think it's the workplace context that makes things so problematic. The absolute only way it would be ok is if he said, "I've been trying to lose weight and I've seen you've had success, can you tell me how you did it?" And if he's a decent bloke he's pretty unlikely to mention a woman's appearance/body at work.

I'm pretty sure a couple of colleagues of mine are on WLI, judging by their recent weightloss, but we've never discussed it and it would feel weird to in my workplace.

Unless he lives under a rock of course he has heard of them!

I'm sure he's heard of them and really doesn't need you to tell him.

Tbf to OP her intentions were genuine, she asked whether it was a good idea, read the replies, taken them on board in good humour and has said she won’t be bring it up with him.

I very much sypathise op. A friend's obese husband recently dropped dead of a heart attack at the age of 61 - leaving 2 teenage children - which was obviously horrendous. My Dad's overweight cousin also died of a heart attack in his late fifties. I think weight loss drugs are pretty well known now so he will be aware of them. I'm trying to think of a circumstance you could say how great these drugs are without targeting him specifically. Do you socialise outside work?

At the very very most, you could mention in passing that you've lost weight using WLI, but the danger there is that it's perceived by your colleague as an unsubtle hint that he needs to do the same. So, not worth the risk of raising it. I'd only talk about it if he directly asks you how you lost weight or what you think about WLI, which seems unlikely.

I am a bit surprised that you couldn't predict the obvious pitfalls with this idea of bringing it up.

I think there’s enough media coverage for him to be aware of their existence OP. There is no need to basically tell him that he’s overweight. You have no idea what’s going on in his life - depression, illness. Keep your beak out.

Absolutely not and especially not at work.

If your plan is literally just to mention that you take them if something about them comes up in conversation, go for it. They've come up at my work place before over lunch chats between friendly colleagues. I don't see it as any different to mentioning you're on any other kind of medication.

I wouldn't do anything to engineer the conversation/push it or relate them in any way to him though if it does come up.

You really don't understand how people can be "evangelical" about them? Imagine that you've struggled with your weight all your life, but it's a battle that you are constantly losing. You love clothes but are restricted in what you can wear and still hate the way you look. You avoid photos. You feel self conscious and avoid certain situations. You never go swimming on holiday with your children, but sit fully clothed on the beach. You never manage to stick to a diet more than a few days and often have an urge to binge. Imagine all this. Then imagine that something becomes available that means that your appetite is lessened, you no longer obsessively plan your next binge, you lose several stone and feel happy and energetic for the first time in years. You no longer self soothe with food. You can enjoy food, but no longer eat to excess or graze mindlessly.
Imagine all this.
Now can you understand why those of us whose life has been completely changed feel evangelical about it?

Jesus Christ, no. Not your business or place and could result in a complaint from him

If he has no eyes and can't read and is intellectually challenged then go ahead otherwise I would assume he's still aware of them.

I would add, that I am a very private person and have only discussed them with a close friend who has struggled with her weight and often moaned about it with me. I would never bring up the topic of weight with anyone else because I know how that feels.

It’s a bit like asking someone with fertility issues if they’ve thought about adoption. Of course they’ve fucking thought about it.

Yes, you'd be incredibly unreasonable. Mind your own business!

Do you think he’s so stupid he’s unaware he’s overweight and also unaware WLI exist? I think everyone knows about WLI by now, most people know someone who uses them too. He will know but has opted so far not to take them which is fine because it’s ultimately his body.

I don’t know why you think this is an appropriate thing to do.

How would you feel if someone came up to you and said you’re looking a little tired or old why don’t you try botox?

My friend went on them because a colleague of hers had lost so much and said how they were magic to her. I agree with what people are saying on here to an extent but I think mentioning you’re on them as opposed to a ‘have you heard of wlis?’ is very different