Daughter didn’t enjoy holiday

[Personil]

DH and I went on holiday with my DD (11). When asked if she enjoyed the holiday she says it was ok but was ruined by being left on her own for 2 hours every day. What she’s referring to is when we went for a siesta. Months later she’s saying she wouldn’t want to go again. WWBU?

Siesta time is normal in Spain and we took our children there regularly but I would never have left one child to occupy themselves for so long. Very strange!

Would you like a gold star? What a weird post.

I don’t think you need to be grateful for something you had no control or input over.

Do a different sort of holiday next time - somewhere cooler and/or with a kids club. We did Neilson most summers when dd was 11-18 - loads for kids/teens to do with or without parents. DH sometimes had a nap while dd and I sailed etc, together or not as apt.

I'd avoid going somewhere that hot that you have to hide indoors for two hours daily. Failing that, I'd make certain she had activities she could do while you sleep. If she did have fun things she could do besides sleep, then she's being a tiny bit silly, but a daily 2-hour nap is still a little much, imo.

Well if months later she's still annoyed about it I guess for was pretty annoyed. I don't understand why you didn't ask her on the first day when you got up if she's slept. It does sound boring for her but I would of thought most children that age could entertain themselves watching TV, reading or playing a switch etc

I still don’t know what you’re talking about. Try to be clear or else stop sending silly messages.

What is so wrong with a child being bored for a couple of hours? Children need to build resilience and realise that life isn’t about being the centre of their parents’ attention and entertained during every waking moment. Adult life isn’t always a laugh a minute.

@Personil I don’t think you did anything wrong. As long as your daughter was safe then a bit of boredom won’t hurt her. Presumably she had access to books or other resources she could have occupied herself with.

I worry that mine, now in their 20s, can’t handle boredom as they are always glued to a screen.

https://childmind.org/article/the-benefits-of-boredom/

What a bizarre thing to say. I had a great childhood. Spent lots of holidays with my parents. But the holidays were for everyone not just me or my sister. We did some child centred stuff and some stuff that was more suited to my parents.

I disagree.

@Personil it’s an odd thing to do everyday whilst on holiday with a child. Were you hungover each day?

I understand having a siesta during the hottest part of the day. Your DD sounds as if she's starting to move into the pre-teen phase when some children enjoy family holidays less, especially if they don't have other children to hang out with. My DD (20) went through this, even though she had her younger brother for company. Perhaps next year you could consider asking a friend to come along with her.

This phase passes though; my DD now likes going on holiday with us again :-)

At that age I didnt expect my parents to amuse me and they never did. They got on with what they had to do and I played with my toys. Children need to learn to amuse themselves and not rely on adults for everything. No wonder young people now have the attentio span of a goldfish. They never learned to handle being bored.

YWBU and weird. You’re not 80, you don’t need a Nana nap!

She's just becoming a grumpy teen. It's fine to leave her to get bored for two hours. She could read a book. I'm Mediterranean. I was left alone while my parents had an afternoon nap throughout my childhood and I don't have any longlast trauma from it.

In fairness a siesta is actually a thing - mostly in hot countries, which is where they were.

I don't think it's massively unreasonable, but once you noticed she was not partaking of this custom, you probably should have organised something with her - a bit of gaming as a treat or similar while you napped. 11 is not an age where they find it easy to nap in the day. They are not little children and still not yet lazy teens.

I mean did she have a book/device with her? Because sitting for two hours in a hotel room could be mind-numbing.

They can't have 2 hours a day to themselves? The child is 11, not a toddler who needs constant adult engagement.

I'd avoid going somewhere that hot that you have to hide indoors for two hours daily.

Are some of these comments making anyone think "Only fools and Englishmen ..."😂

Why are some people acting like it’s a crime to not entertain an 11 year old for a couple hours lol

Haha I’ve had a quick shag and a nap at times. Children were fine.lol

Possibly more independent.

But it was in a pub beer garden in the late 80's while the parents were inside that my friend remembers her brother showing her and other assembled dc how to fire marbles by pushing the marble and the end of his willy in and letting it spring back into shape. There was a competition to fire it the longest distance, using his equipment.

She did seem mildly scarred by it tbh... and I have to wonder about the effect on him.

So it all depends how independence is defined really. Generally speaking I think reasonably close supervision can be quite useful myself.

Ok I asked my 12 &13 yr old what they would feel they said what a spoilt brat. So what a 2 hr rest is nothing on a holiday. Honestly even kids can see it isn’t unreasonable to rest on holiday

At that age my DD wouldn’t have liked it either. She’s very much a people person and doesn’t like being on her own. At 11 she didn’t have a phone or iPad or anything so would have just sat there bored and lonely.

Now she’s older with a phone she wouldn’t care at all and would either nap herself or sunbathe whilst scrolling through Snapchat.

I think you’re just at that tricky age where they’re not little kids so will happily nap, but they’re also not teenagers where they like their own space.

Why did you want to sleep in the day when you are on holiday, it's not something I or anyone else I've gone on holiday have ever done, hot weather is no excuse.

I feel sorry for your daughter, it's just weird and mean.

I am staggered at the poll results on this thread!!