Page 16 | What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done?

shehardlysleeps · 2026-04-20T16:18:51+00:00

I’m in a reflective mood, and it’s got me thinking about something I did a few years ago which is probably the thing I’m most deeply ashamed of. There was a coworker who really rubbed me up the wrong way. I was very unhappy at the time, and going through an awful time personally. She would make snide comments about me, do things with my family members (who were colleagues too) which really got my back up, I felt like she judged me harshly and was pretty rude. Along with another colleague they made three or four very nasty comments which still stick with me. Instead of raising a grievance, which I should have done, I took to posting about her on another website (along the lines of Mumsnet), not realising she used it too. She saw the posts and reported me, and I ended up facing a meeting with HR and a senior partner of the firm I was working in. It damaged my reputation within the firm forever and I ended up leaving after not being offered a promotion. I still feel ashamed of it now, nearly half a decade on, and feel like it’s tarred me forever. Whats the worst thing you’ve ever done?

AlwaysTheRenegade · Yesterday 05:28

TheSecretAgent1 · 20/04/2026 21:08

I got drunk and let a married co-worker go down on me, his wife found out and left him

Ghosted a friend after she was really there for me when I was depressed

Queen!

sashh · Yesterday 05:54

I'm sure this isn't the worst thing, but it might amuse some of you.

I once kidnapped a teddy bear and demanded pop and mars bars as the ransom.

HelloDaisy · Yesterday 06:08

TheDenimPoet · 20/04/2026 23:55

I had a nasty, sexually abusive relationship in my late teens/early 20s, and in my mid 20s after breaking up with him I went through a really horrible time mentally, and slept with people just because I could, because they wanted me, and because for once I was in control of sex rather than being forced. Not an excuse btw - but a reason.

Two of the people were in relationships. One of them had small kids and I was friends with his wife.

I can't tell you enough how much the mentally stable version of me is against cheating. It's more than a decade ago, and I feel disgusted at myself. I hate women who do what I did. They were much older men as well, and I loved that they were so flattered and grateful.

I have tried so hard to be a better person since and, for what it's worth, I've never cheated on a partner.

I could have written your post. It still upsets me when I think about how I behaved then..

Kittylickingplate · Yesterday 06:55

UhOhRatPoo · 20/04/2026 19:59

I once lied to airline staff that my Dad had had a heart attack so I could get swapped to an earlier flight home from a backpacking trip as I was bored and had run out of money. I was about 22.

He was fine then (absolutely perfect health) but he died three years later, in his early fifties, of a sudden and aggressive cancer that came out of nowhere. I feel like I tempted fate.

I also smacked the kids that I looked after when I was a teenage au pair. The parents told me to discipline them like that and I had been smacked as a child (we all were in the 70s/80s) so I didn’t question it. I have been thinking about that a lot now my DS is the same age as the boy I smacked. I would never lay a hand on DS.

Edited

I am sorry about your Dad, that is very sad.
If it makes you feel better, I was smacked a lot as a child ( 1970's) smacked, not beaten, it didn't have any long term issues with me. I did not smack my children but I have no ill feeling to my Mam or Nana or Aunts that smacked me.

Housedramallama · Yesterday 07:37

Got married when I didn't want to

Jenasaurus · Yesterday 07:41

when I discovered my ex of 28 years was cheating, I removed half his aftershave and replaced it with urine, it made me feel a little better when he covered himself in the stuff on a night out to meet her

x2boys · Yesterday 07:45

Tredadt · Yesterday 04:58

My daughter graduated 2 years ago. She's shy and very quiet and she struggled to find a job. I' was worried about her and wanted her settled. In the meantime, I got her working in my admin team at work in a local authority via an agency. I manage the admin team though don't directly line manage them. Weird set up but worked out perfectly.

I knew that a new role was being created which is a higher grade than the admin officers in my team. I gave my daughter full access to restricted areas meant for senior management and trained her fully in my role and also in everything for the new role. I wrote the job description tailoring it to the tasks my daughter does and to her strengths. The admin team only knew about it 6m before it was signed off. They requested to see the JD but were refused.

I fobbed off any requests for training from the admin officers in my team only focussing on my daughter's development. Poor things, asked so many times, lol. The job was advertised and my daughter obviously got it..She is now a senior member of my team and we work alongside each other.

The job is pretty good and will probably set her up for life in a very nice department in a good field. When I retire, she will take on my work.

Nepotism at its best
Happens all the time in the NHS too.

BrickBiscuit · Yesterday 07:51

x2boys · Yesterday 07:45

Nepotism at its best
Happens all the time in the NHS too.

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Happens in all sectors. Friends and family, the faces that fit, the old boy network. Seen it everywhere.

User83837377373 · Yesterday 07:52

In my 20s I was in an abusive relationship where he would not leave my house, was an Alcoholic and drug abuser. I was scared and fairly helpless.
One day I got some expensive catfood and made it into a pie and gave it to him for tea.
I'm actually not ashamed of this. I got him out eventually and each time he was mean, I would think of CatPie 😂

I would also wipe his toothbrush in the toilet

Ilovr · Yesterday 07:54

Nor trying to take over the thread, but does one ever get to a point where guilt from their past doesn't consume them anymore and does the development of our prefrontal lobe have alot to do with our decisions? ( please don't chew me, I know some young people made good decisions) but why can't I recognize the person I was.. Does one ever get there or it just becomes a part of you for the rest of your life. It's awful. I hate it here.

Myblueclematis · Yesterday 07:55

BrickBiscuit · Yesterday 07:51

Happens in all sectors. Friends and family, the faces that fit, the old boy network. Seen it everywhere.

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Yes, I too saw this in a public sector job, it was pretty sickening at times watching colleagues who worked hard for any promotions that came up, only to see the daughter of a senior member waltz into these positions and climb the greasy promotion pole in front of others when she'd been there just a few months.

The fall out with other colleagues was spectacular and caused massive upset.

Glad to be out of it thankfully and safely retired.

cheekynamechang3 · Yesterday 07:57

ToffeePennie · Yesterday 03:00

I was friends with a bunch of ladies, we all had babies the same year. I asked for some advice from a parenting online group because I was debating doing something with DS1. Several ladies said they couldn’t understand doing it, which confused the situation for me, so I asked on the group if they thought it was a good idea or no. Long story short, one of the ladies found out I had asked and because the responses had been vicious towards their opinion, was very offended and upset that I had even asked about it. She showed the other women, and they decided they no longer wished to be friends. I am still suffering the consequences (aka depression and anxiety) over 12 years later.

I honestly think it's on these friends not you. Unless you identified the friends or something.

So many people post like this in mumsnet don't they? "I want to do x,y,z but my friends think its crazy. What do you think?". It's a sanity check.

If this group dropped you over that, all of them, they're not real friends.

If it makes you feel better, I had a group of friends like you describe, about 13 years ago. I thought we were all fantastic friends and then one of them just stopped replying to me and putting me off when I asked to see her. She moved out of the area and had a big leaving party and didn't invite me and I don't know why to this day. I don't really see any of them anymore anyway as 2 moved away and we all went back to work.

Hugs to you, please don't blame yourself for this. You are not lacking in some way as a human being. This is definitely a "them" problem.

dinopool · Yesterday 07:58

I had several affairs when I was married.

ChamonixMountainBum · Yesterday 07:59

I deeply regret not doing more to defend or stand up for a kid at school who was getting mercilessly bullied by 'the cool gang'. He was a nice lad, a bit quirky which I guess was enough to make him a target. I was friendly with a few of his tormentors so possibly in a position to influence them over their actions, but I stood idly by while convincing myself that I was still 'good' because I was not a direct participant in the bullying. He was a really creative type, amazing vision and imagination and his artwork was phenomenal and I always wondered where he ended up and I always wanted to apologise for being a bystander.

Anonymouseposter · Yesterday 07:59

I read this thread just before going to sleep last night. I was treated to a replay of my less than stellar moments as I nodded off. I decided not to read any more this morning. I’m not vindictive but there were times I had lost my temper and said things I regret or been unnecessarily snippy, and a few very cringe moments too. Thanks.

AmberSpy · Yesterday 08:05

PracticalPolicy · 20/04/2026 20:29

So she was rude. Maybe you should have managed it better. Trying to ruin someone's life because you can't answer back or handle it like an adult is a terrible thing to do.

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Do you regularly bully your colleagues?

cheekynamechang3 · Yesterday 08:07

Tredadt · Yesterday 04:58

My daughter graduated 2 years ago. She's shy and very quiet and she struggled to find a job. I' was worried about her and wanted her settled. In the meantime, I got her working in my admin team at work in a local authority via an agency. I manage the admin team though don't directly line manage them. Weird set up but worked out perfectly.

I knew that a new role was being created which is a higher grade than the admin officers in my team. I gave my daughter full access to restricted areas meant for senior management and trained her fully in my role and also in everything for the new role. I wrote the job description tailoring it to the tasks my daughter does and to her strengths. The admin team only knew about it 6m before it was signed off. They requested to see the JD but were refused.

I fobbed off any requests for training from the admin officers in my team only focussing on my daughter's development. Poor things, asked so many times, lol. The job was advertised and my daughter obviously got it..She is now a senior member of my team and we work alongside each other.

The job is pretty good and will probably set her up for life in a very nice department in a good field. When I retire, she will take on my work.

Out of all the posts I've read, this winds me up the most. Especially as you don't seem to feel bad about it.

I despise unfair work practices and have been victim to them myself. I hate it when crappy candidates get promoted to jobs they don't deserve.

I would never do this for my children. I would be up for getting them work experience at my place or swing a temp job for them, but nothing beyond that. Hopefully my children will be able to stand on their own two feet and get jobs they deserve and qualify for rather than be handed one by mummy.

ChamonixMountainBum · Yesterday 08:07

BrickBiscuit · Yesterday 07:51

Happens in all sectors. Friends and family, the faces that fit, the old boy network. Seen it everywhere.

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Always thought nepotism was more about promoting family members (irrespective of their suitability)?

Networking is slightly different insofar as there still being a requirement to actually be qualified for the role but you get a head start in the recruitment process.

ThatCyanCat · Yesterday 08:08

cheekynamechang3 · Yesterday 08:07

Out of all the posts I've read, this winds me up the most. Especially as you don't seem to feel bad about it.

I despise unfair work practices and have been victim to them myself. I hate it when crappy candidates get promoted to jobs they don't deserve.

I would never do this for my children. I would be up for getting them work experience at my place or swing a temp job for them, but nothing beyond that. Hopefully my children will be able to stand on their own two feet and get jobs they deserve and qualify for rather than be handed one by mummy.

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Everybody will know she only got the job because of her mum.

Thatfattrollop · Yesterday 08:11

In my 20s I let my boyfriend drive my car at over 120mph on the motorway. Not sure what I was thinking.

x2boys · Yesterday 08:11

ThatCyanCat · Yesterday 08:08

Everybody will know she only got the job because of her mum.

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It wont make the other potential candidates feel any better though .

cheekynamechang3 · Yesterday 08:13

x2boys · Yesterday 08:11

It wont make the other potential candidates feel any better though .

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it will be very demoralising. They'll think "what chance have I got? I don't have a parent in a position to give me a promotion."

Iocanepowder · Yesterday 08:14

Agreeing to have kids. It is so far proving to be a disaster for all of us.

Nollie · Yesterday 08:16

SheThinksShesAllThat · 20/04/2026 23:05

What kind of guidance do you think you needed? I’m only asking because I have myself down some shameful things in my past that still haunt me and know k have a daughter myself to want to guide her as best as I can into knowing how to react or not be peer pressured into doing something.

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For various reasons, I got ignored a lot in my childhood. I would have loved my parents to show an interest, to be friendly and supportive. I could have done (and did do) anything and there never seemed to be any consequences or acknowledgement of what I'd done. It was lonely and I felt (I knew) that I didn't really matter to my family.

wellerrrrrm · Yesterday 08:16

Iocanepowder · Yesterday 08:14

Agreeing to have kids. It is so far proving to be a disaster for all of us.

I’ve definitely felt like this before x