I had no idea that my friend is a multi millionaire!!

[shockedpuppy]

Been friends for 35+ years. Both from "normal" working class backgrounds. I found out today, that her DH's business turned over £100 Million last year. Yes, One Hundred Million, it's not a typo.

They have a nice house in the South East, worth maybe £700k. There are no obvious signs of such wealth. They are not big spenders. We were at a party with them last month, and they were (as usual) quite slow to get the drinks in when it was their turn. We definitely got in more rounds. Gifts at Christmas are especially frugal, I normally receive something that has obviously been recycled as it's so bizarre, or it's obviously a freebie with another purchase.

I had been feeling quite good recently about money, as we pay off our mortgage later this year (house worth about £340k for context), and we will have a reasonable amount in savings. Now I just feel a bit Meh, as we will never attain anything like this. Just one million would do me, lol. I know comparison is the thief of joy, but I feel absolutely positively green with envy.

They will be able to do things for their 3 daughters when the time comes, like buy them homes outright - something we can't do.

We are all in our 50's, if that's of any relevance.

Yes from what I've seen the wealthy are often very stingy..I worked for a multi -millionaire. His wife used to come and park in the office car park when she was going to shop in the jewellers in town. A colleague told me when they set up the offices, she went into the local charity shops to buy us second hand mugs for the kitchen.

There's loads of things like this.

Her husband kept such a close eye on the bank accounts, one day, about ten years ago now, Bank of Scotland put their bank charges up almost double. Think it was something like going from £8 per month to £15 per month and he got me to raise a massive complaint with them. He didn't win anything but just wanted me to lodge a complaint.

From what I've seen ( certain ) millionaires are complete tightwads.

I'd be disappointed that they were so stingy anyway, regardless of their wealth. So annoying being out with people like that!
Why are you feeling inferior? They aren't better than you, would you want to be a Scrooge?

At least they haven’t flashed their wealth in everyone’s faces. Surely that would be worse?
Bit annoying that they are slow to get a round of drinks in but some folk are just a bit tighter than others.

Ok, so that’s the company’s net assets not their own. They can’t just extract it, the company needs them to run.
do you know that they are the only shareholder?
they might have lots of personal debt from putting money into the company.
anything they take out will get taxed so will not be 20m.
the company might have lots of commitments which they dove a recognised liability for.

you cannot look at his company’s financial statements and know his individual wealth.

I have some friends with this kind of wealth. I don't give it a second thought.
If you have food, a roof and love in your life then anything extra is just decoration.
They made different life choices. Thats it.
With differrnt choices anyones life could be anlot better or a lot worse
Just carry on as usual.

I'm not surprised they hadn't told you, you sound horrific. They probably keep their finances to themselves to avoid grabby, jealous people wanting to leech off them!

It doesn’t “bother” me and I am pleased for my friend. They are a lovely couple, genuinely. I’m allowed to be shocked though! All these years I’ve had no idea how rich they were. The business was given to them by his parents, not built by them. I don’t believe people who say they wouldn’t be surprised to find this out after 35 years of friendship.

Oh I’d love to hear how I’m leeching? Jeezo !

I bet you'd complain if they were spend spend spend on brand new everything instead of buying second hand and that money going towards the charity?

It clearly does bother you though otherwise why would your first thought be to post a thread on here explicitly detailing how tight you thought they were.

If you're just surprised then you wouldn't have checked online and then made the thread.

I just feel a bit Meh, as we will never attain anything like this. Just one million would do me, lol. I know comparison is the thief of joy, but I feel absolutely positively green with envy.

Snooping on Companies House, starting a thread on here discussing your friend's financial situation - you sounds deeply unpleasant, call yourself a friend?

Your friends worth £200 million hang out with people on benefits? Don’t believe that for a minute.

I used to have a business that turned over millions of pounds a year. Sometimes things were so tight that I couldn’t even take a modest wage and I was paying the PAYE bill on my credit cards. I’m sure most of my staff thought I was rolling in cash, when in reality I had zero savings (everything had gone into the business) and drove the crappest car in the company. Things did improve and eventually I sold up, but it was nowhere near the amount I was supposedly worth ‘on paper’. Enough to pay the mortgage off and bung a few quid in the pension.

Turnover means nothing. It always riles me on ‘Rich House Poor House’ where they use it as some kind of flex. It’s utterly meaningless.

@aredrosegrewup if they ever went to charity shops for their own things that would have been lovely..But they didn't . They only bought second-hand for their employees.

You already won life’s lottery by being born in the UK (I assume), one of the top ten wealthiest countries in the world . We’ve got the NHS, pretty good schooling, a safe country and it sounds like you can probably go on holiday once a year. Be happy for your friend and look at what you’ve got not what you haven’t in comparison to your friend.

So what? You don't get to dictate what people spend their money on.

You have a lot less financially than your friends and they still hang around with you

@aredrosegrewup I have no wish to dictate how they spend their money. I'm illustrating that millionaires in my limited experience, are stingy tight- arses when it comes to spending on others.

That says more about you than anything else. Don't judge everyone else by your standards

I feel embarrassed for you and sorry for them.
Why do you think you have have the right to count their money, and make assumptions about their private finances - and you’re clearly ill informed too. Why is it your right to decide how much they should spend or behave financially?
Jealousy is your problem, if you want wealth why don’t you go and earn it and take some risks?
Don’t you have better things to do than snoop on your friends?

YANBU
After knowing them for 35 years, I think realistically most people would be very shocked.

Doesn’t bother you and they’re a lovely couple but you’ve made the points that they’re tight with drinks, gifts, and now that their business was “given to them not built by them”. No wonder they don’t discuss their finances with you.

@shockedpuppy on paper they may seem rich, but in terms of actual cash in the bank it could depend on what investments or other activites the capital is tied up with @shockedpuppy

Wow you really do sound awful!

although i wish i was rich, this is why id be secret rich if i was