Found out my childhood friend / First crush is doing life for attempted robbery and it's messed me up.

[Flynn99]

Met him when I was 11 and he was 15. He was the "tough kid" at school but always nice to me and stood up for younger kids. This experience was so formative that I based a lot of my personality around him. My dad was abusive so he was the first masculine figure my brain tagged as being safe. I'd been bullied most of my life, and he was my first protector.

Tried contacting him again in December but he deleted his FB account before reading it. Later found out he got arrested for trying to rob his neighbour’s house and people were calling him a “smackhead” / heroin addict. That was 5 months ago, so it adds up.

I always knew he was kind of a rebel but I never thought he’d end up like that and it's made me feel shocked, sad and a bit empty.

I literally found out about this earlier today.

There is no way on Gods good earth, that he got life for 'Attempted Robbery' If he is serving a life sentance, then he has done some terrible things. Stop worshipping a criminal.

Yeeeeaaaaa I’m with the others. Are you 100% sure he got life? If so, are you 100% sure it was just for attempted robbery???

Nobody gets a life sentence for attempting to burgle someone's house so he's clearly got an extensive history of committing crime. And clearly enacted some violence on this occasion too.

Someone who's violent to other people and breaks into peoples homes is not a fucking angel.

Grow up and stop romanticising him for drama.

He didn’t get life for this. He’s done some other stuff. Or it’s a total exaggeration.

He got a life sentence just for a first attempted robbery? Sure.
As my husband says, of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.

I think you’re being really unfair to OP. A childhood hero has turned out to have turned bad. Very much a fallen angel, exactly that.

It’s not unreasonable to be sad that someone you thought was one of the good guys actually turned criminal.

Nailed it 🤣

No one turns into a criminal for fecks safe...it's very much a life choice!

You sound as though you're one of those women who gets in touch with someone in prison with the goal of starting a relationship with him, OP. The man he is today bears absolutely no resemblance to the boy he was. In fact you only saw one small aspect of how he was then. You have literally no idea who this man is now.

WTF?

It doesn’t sound like you have seen him for years and you’re just finding a way to make this about you.

Absolutely no way he got life for this 🙄

It’s not OP’s fault though. Someone she’s remembered fondly is actually a criminal now- indeed as a result of their own life choices. It’s still shocking and saddening.

@PrizedPickledPopcorn yep but he does not make him a fluffy fallen angel...FFS

Kindly. you are making this all about you. What about his victims? You don't really figure in this story at all!

Precisely!
wonder how the victims of his crimes view him?

People change OP. My best friend from that age contacted me a few years ago. Told me he had lost both his children into care. He'd hit, burnt and bitten his 3 year old. God knows what else.

His partner had allowed it so both girls were removed, the 3 year old and the new baby. I haven't been in touch with him since as I just can't reconcile it. I'm sure life has been hard on him because that is not the boy I knew at school.

He was naughty, always misbehaving and we were forever being separated as we'd be up to no good but never anything malicious, just mischief.

Lucifer, satan, is a fallen angel. Do you not know what the fallen bit means?

Yes, but to get that level of sentence says it's an exceptionally terrible set of facts.

House "robbery" is actually burglary which is a totally different set of offences and sentencing guidelines - have you seen the actual offences he's been convicted of ie reported in the paper?

Childhood hero?!

Next the OP will call him 'just misunderstood'.
Try thinking about his victims instead of wallowing in self pity.

I agree.

He was. When they were both kids, he stood up for the smaller kids like her, against the bullies.

I was going to say a version of this. You knew a very different person back then and he went on to have a fairly different future to how you knew him.

I think I’m wondering why are you chasing the past rather than creating a present where you don’t feel you need to do that. Is there something currently going on in your life that you were trying to address going back to this person. You deserve a very nice peaceful life after the very difficult start you had and you deserve the types of people in your life who will bring that to you. Apparently he would have brought chaos into your life if he had been a permanent fixture.

A life sentence is possible if the perpetrator has a long criminal history, and if he used a weapon or bladed article to threaten his victims.

Judges have wide powers within the sentencing guidelines and a life sentence is certainly possible in this situation.

There will be many, many more offences.
If the judge has used the maximum sentence of life imprisonment they wouldn't have reached that lightly. Someone would definitely not get a sentence like that for burglary of someone's home (robbery is a different & aggravated offence)
Even people with extensive history of aggravated offences & conspiracy to rob are not getting anywhere near life imprisonment.