‘Catching print’ trend humiliating DS - contact college or let it go for now??

[DandyPeer]

DS, 17, is feeling upset by this ‘catching print’ trend. Some might already know about it but on TikTok over the last few weeks there’s been a trend where women can estimate a male’s ‘size’ based on the print on the trousers. When this trend was brought to my attention by DD, 14, last week I thought nothing of it as it was just on TikTok at the time.

Apparently since going back to college on Monday, some girls are using this trend to mock boys and DS feels judged by it. He told me that in a group task, whenever he tried to contribute, the girls were saying things like ‘shut it A print’ and he and another boy felt quite humiliated.

At first I thought it was just a silly trend that will fade in no time (and I still do think that) but today DD had a friend over and I overheard the friend say ‘Your brother is an A print’ whilst laughing. I thought that was really rude and inappropriate. DD, told me that on TikTok people were saying it’s about making them feel as uncomfortable as they make women and it’s levelling the playing field. I do understand the argument in theory, but I don’t like the idea of DS feeling judged and embarrassed in college over something like this.

Part of me thinks it’s just a passing trend and will die out in a week or two, but part of me feels it’s crossing into bullying.

Would it be best to contact the college about DS’ bullying or just let it pass? At the moment that’s what I’ve told DS that will just pass after a few days or weeks.

He’s 17 - he won’t want mummy running to College! How embarrassing

I wonder if your daughter is behind all this!

If at college - why does your 14 year old dd and her friend also go to this college?

@Itsthenameisntit who said they were at the same college? DD had her friend over at OUR house.

He's 17

I'd like to think he can contact the college and advocate for himself?

It's a horrible trend though - yuk!

Don't contact the college. That would be inappropriate for a 17 year old.

YABU to contact the college, but YANBU to say it is bullying. And it sounds nasty.

Of course you should contact the college. They need to take action on this.

It will pass but I would contact the college anyway, not just for your son but for all of the other students too.

If the boys were saying similar about my DD I would be horrified.

Not only is it disgusting but it can make them body conscious for the rest of their lives.

They’re in college and need to grow up.
We need to nip any form of sexual harassment in the bud and let them know it’s not ok.

@RoseField1 should I just leave it be or what?

@Tacohill This is what I’d like to avoid - him having body consciousness due to this!

Ok so this is even extending beyond college.

So what would college do about your DD’s friends??

It's bullying and sexual harassment.

Yes I would contact the college.

but today DD had a friend over and I overheard the friend say ‘Your brother is an A print’ whilst laughing.

Given neither dd nor the friend going to college - they’re not going to be able to do a damn thing about this are they? So it’s going on at college and also amongst girls unrelated to college?

@Itsthenameisntit It came from TikTok so no it’s not a college thing, I was just wondering whether they’d be able to have a word with the girls doing this.

But it’s not just those girls is it?

By coincidence… your daughter’s friends are also saying it about your son.

That's grim - more to the point it's sexual harassment.

I would definitely be talking to the college about it.

I wouldn't do anything. It's a silly trend that will be forgotten by this time next week. If you make a big deal of it, your son will feel even more humiliated. Women and girls have had to put up with comments about breast size, or lack of it, for decades, and this is just treating men and boys to the same derogatory comments. Ignore it.

Gross. Yes contact them, totally unacceptable to comment on someone’s genitals. Nasty behaviour.

Then it has nothing to do with the college. It's happening in your house so why didn't you tell the girl to leave, that she wasn't welcome in your house until she grows up, then punish your DD.

She's your daughter, it's your job to raise her not to be so damn nasty.

So a child who doesn’t go to the college said this about your son and you’re wondering wether to complain to the college?

@365RubyRed This was another angle I was going to discuss with DS and when DD told me about it last week this is what she told me it was in part about.

I haven’t heard of this. Sounds like it reverses the nastiness that teenage boys hurl at girls: “Shut up, A cup.” “No one cares what an A cup thinks.” “No one wants an A cup.” And on and on.

Giving the benefit of the doubt on this, as it is very… unusual for a 14 year-old to comment on her friend’s brother’s penis size… I think contacting the college would embarrass him further.

And did you have a word with your daughter's friend?

Did she apologise?

Did your DD say something like "Stop talking about my brother's penis, you're disgusting"?

If he's not getting support at home, I'm not sure why you'd expect it from college.

@Balloonhearts DD never said anything about her brother, it was her friend. I did ask DD if she’d been saying anything to boys at her school and she said no.

At 17 this has got nothing to do with you.

If somebody needs to intervene, it’s him.