Sharing plates

[cupfinalchaos]

This is now the norm in many restaurants. Much easier for them to bring out dishes whenever they’re ready and not have to remember who ordered what.

But am I on my own in not wanting to eat what other people order and not wanting to share the only dish I fancy on the menu? Even if I tell the waiter/waitress I’m ordering for myself, it gets placed in the centre of the table for everyone. Recently I didn’t even get to try what I’d ordered as I was in conversation and when I looked down it was gone! In one restaurant i had to ask for extra cutlery so the person with a cold wasn’t sticking his fork in..

AIBU to think restaurants have normalised an easy option for themselves?

This has never happened to me, the wait staff ask who ordered the xxx and then place it in front of that person. I have shared a pudding before but had to request additional spoons. I think this is a problem caused by who you are going with and not where you are going. I have on occasion shared meals or each tried a bit of each others but we always check who wants what and no person would ever eat it all!

I can’t do sharing in a restaurant.

That does sound annoying, and yes I agree that sharing plates has become more common whenever I book restaurants (I'm an EA) in London. It was the same in Southern Germany when we held a conference there recently.

Personally I don't go to restaurants enough to see it as an issue, and when I do, the people I'd be with would understand that I would like to eat what I have ordered myself.

There are lots of restaurants like this in the city where I live. And they serve lovely food, so I enjoy eating there. I'm happy to share with dh or with a close friend (and it's nice to try a different range of foods) but I hate sharing when there are several people. Often their favourites are not something I'd ever have, and if I've spotted something delicious on the menu, that is what I want. I've ended up paying my share of the bill for something I don't eat, and not getting much of what I do like. I'm much more forthright about my choices now, and dh always has my back if others try to dig into / 'sample' what I've ordered.

Happy to share sides.

I find the random order in which plates arrive more irritating. Recently a plate of veg arrived right at the end - when all the fish / meat was finished - who wants to eat a plate of samphire on its own?. In one place (wasn't sharing plates but was food arrived when it was ready). Dh's 2 dishes, which were sort of starter and main (e.g. scallops followed by meatballs) both arrived together as the last 2 dishes to be served. He had to sit hungrily through everyone else eating, then got his together, not a combo you'd ever choose to eat simultaneously. It was the restaurant of a famous chef. We won't be going back.

I find I often have to ask for additional cutlery - spoons to serve dishes with, or a spoon to eat the sauce, or clean cutlery or plates because I don't want to eat my meaty lamb dish from a plate that still has some shellfish bisque on it.

I think sometimes it is not well thought through by the restaurant.

What fresh hell is this???

I also find that portion sizes on sharing plates are not well thought out. e.g. 3 scallops when there are 4 of us sharing the dish, or 3 haggis bon bons when it is 2 people sharing. The serving staff should know enough about the dish to advise ordering 2 portions if the there are more diners than food items.

I particularly hate sharing naan bread or flat breads in a group. I don't want something that several others have handled with their bare hands.

Yeah it's gross

Yuk, I’d hate that. The only person I’d share with is my husband. If I ever went somewhere like that I wouldn’t, I’d insist that I served myself a portion before everyone else got started. It’s then up to everyone else to decide if they do the same. I’m like that with dips at parties. Unless I’ve seen the host open the dip I won’t go up and if I do, I scoop some out and never return. Double dipping is gross 🤮 🤮

I’m another one in the Joey Tribiani camp.

If you are aware it is possible to speak then you should have spoken up in the scenario you described and there wouldn't have been an issue.
But you didn't.

If you find yourself in a similar situation in future then speak up.

I'm not being chippy with the OP. It's AIBU. I didn't say she was BU. She's perfectly entitled to like or dislike anything. I just said I happen to like it.

And I was just pointing out that the times I've eaten at Sessions Arts Club, even though it might not say it on the menu, they have made it clear that they recommend it as sharing plates, so it's not like they just randomly plunk your main in the centre of the table and yell, surprise, you're sharing!

No reason to get yourself in a state.

Oh, hah. Was it Osteria Angelina? The food is interesting, but, my God, the noise is insane and the atmosphere feels a bit manufactured.

I love a tasting menu but can't do the wine pairings, so just have them recommend a glass or two.

Oh my goodness😂

Literally the only restaurants where this has ever happened to me are Tapas places. I have never had my ordered main dish presented as one to be shared in any other other dining establishment. If it did it would Swifty be met with the response of 'No, that's mine'

Exactly. I genuinely cannot understand OP at all.