To think I would rather pay for sex, if I could be assured of the quality

[GrandmaRosiesSecretDrawer]

I’m a really busy woman. I don’t have the time to mess around on apps and the men all seem so desperate and seedy. It’s either ‘I want to meet my perfect match, my soul mate’ or a pic of a headless six pack and the depressingly inaccurate aubergine emojis.
I feel too old to deal with all this. I just want my needs met.
It feels so seedy but I would just rather be fully open about the transactional aspect of it, the fact it’s not going anywhere, the expectation I have, and maybe a small part of me is worried about rejection?
I don’t want a relationship but to get the sort of benefits I dream of appears so complicated.

I did a fair bit of casual sex dating for a while. It had its downsides but tbh I found it fun, energising and entertaining. Having never been a woman that other people appeared particularly attracted to (I’ve been asked out on an actual date twice in my life) I found being in demand quite nice. And by ‘demand’ I meant that I could be as picky as I liked and still have plenty to choose from. Most of all for me was the joy of meeting human beings in a pure space for something mutually pleasing. I learned a lot too.

Prostitution to me is not a positive force in society or an individual’s life. It may be inevitable in some form but I would always want people prostituting themselves to have other choices.

Why do you think that someone selling sex as their best option in life will not have strange off putting physical/behavioural characteristics, while someone like you who doesn’t want a relationship but still likes sex, will? They may do odd things, but casual sex mean you don’t have to put up with them in your life. Like I say, there are certainly downsides, but for me the upsides were worth it.

Firstly, swingers clubs aren't like that, but if it's not for you then that's valid.
Secondly, what you need is to get on fabswingers and create a profile, set it to not allow single men to message you (or you'll be inundated with dross) and carefully read verifications of men you like the look of until you find a few options to message. Verifications will tell you a lot about whether a man is a) safe and b) actually any good.

Paying for sex wouldn't guarantee the guy was any good. If you want vetted, recommended casual sex you can get it for free with no ethical issues. Although you should probably offer to split the cost of the hotel if that's where you decide to meet :) good luck!

OP: the men all seem so desperate and seedy.

Also OP: their dicks aren't big enough and I want to pay to use another humans body for sex

Leaving aside the ethical implications, for a lot of women isn't being desired what makes sex sexy? If you have to pay someone to want you would you even enjoy it? Genuinely asking as I guess that is how I feel and thought most women did but maybe I am wrong about that.

You do sound pretty desperate yourself.

Was just about to quote this film 😁

Go over to the sex board OP. There’s always recommendations for specialist ‘erotic massage’ or ‘yoni massage’ with the likes of Colin or Jerome. I strongly suspect that it’s not just hands that are used. 🤨

The men who pay for sex also convince themselves they are special and different. It’s wrong, whoever does it. You can’t buy consent.

Jus find yourself a FWB and stop daydreaming about paying to sexually assault someone.

What is your problem OP - male escorts are a thing, they are not called "prostitutes" but basically this is what they are... I know through a gay friend ))

I disagree that female and male sex workers are the same. Males generally can shag pretty much anyone and I would think they generally enjoy it (at least the ones that sell sex). Maybe there is an element of people with issues but I doubt there are many that are being trafficked and forced to do it (except maybe if it involves underage people or some sort of grimy fetishes).

I would also add that escorts, at least good ones, are not cheap.

I’ve googled this film, never having watched it,it was about a middle aged widow who’s never had an orgasm and apparently the male escort never managed to make her come either but she made herself come and ended up being happy with that? Not what the OP is after.

45% agree with you OP but the other bunch are shouting louder about how you should feel and what you should want sexually.
I can totally understand where you come from. I know someone that has a regular 'massage' from a guy. She's single, shes happy and it works for her.

I would only want to have sex with someone who wanted to have sex with me, I wouldn’t want someone touching my body only because he’d been paid to.

Men also like to convince themselves that women enjoy sex they have sold. I used to think that women would t deceive themselves in the same way.

I would not do this to another person, I'd rather just be celibate.

I don't understand how paying for sex appeals to you, but a community of like minded people who are open and non judgemental about the exact arrangement you want, and among whom you stand a good chance of finding an actual consenting casual lover who is not for sale, is so disgusting and pathetic.

Remember that plenty of men post here pretending to be women, often to push agendas.

No. HTH.

In the heads of anyone with a basic ethical framework, buying consent is repugnant.

If genuine the OP is looking for moral permission to do this without guilt and shame.

I doubt that's what posters will say for good reason.

Male escort agency? With extras available and book a hotel.

Any transaction that involves a human being, can't be guaranteed that they aren't there due to various reasons from financial needs to coercion. Friends with benefits is one thing, but if money is switching hands, let it be to LoveHoney or Anne Summers and make it battery operated.

Paying for sex is gross, full stop

Slightly more to the film than that

I guess that is easy to say if you are in a relationship and get regular sex that way. If you are alone, not very attractive, etc, etc it may be the only option. I don't have a problem with men or women selling sexual services if they are doing it purely to make good money for themselves, not walking the streets, working for pimps and living in squalor. And some do have regular clients.