AIBU to hesitate over dating an old friend with conspiracy beliefs?

[Badmom101]

I’ve recently reconnected with a man that I’ve known since school, so well over 40 years. We were close in our teens/early 20’s, nothing romantic, used to hang around in a big group and had a couple of drunken snogs/fumbles but it never turned into anything more, although always thought he was a lovely guy. We all drifted apart, got married had kids and I hadn’t seen or spoken to him for over 20 years. Fast forward to now and we’re both divorced, kids grown up and we met again last year at an event. We still get on really well, have kept in touch, frequent texting and met for a few walks and coffee, and there’s definitely been a bit of flirting going on from both sides. However - he is a 100% believer that lizard people walk amongst us!! That they are in places of power - think royal family, trump etc - and they control society. Apart from that he’s perfectly normal 🥴, has a good, professional, responsible job, a lovely relationship with his kids and family, good group of friends including some of his old friendship circle from school, so I don’t really know what to make of it. On one hand I’m thinking it would be nice to see where, if anywhere, this might lead and that I shouldn’t write him off based on his beliefs, in the same way that I wouldn’t write him off if he was devoutly Christian for example, but on the other hand I’m thinking, hell no, run for the hills! Would be interested to hear what others would feel/think?! So AIBU - yes, give the poor man a chance if he is otherwise lovely or AINBU - hell no, run for the hills.

Intense religion??!

The vast majority of Catholics are perfectly normal people. In fact most of them only bother to turn up at Easter, Christmas, and weddings/baptisms/funerals. Hell, I even know a Catholic who is gay.

It’s as hardline as you let be.

Im so glad you sound so balanced.
AVOID!!!!!

I've voted YANBU but I want to know how he reacts when you challenge him on the conspiracy theory. Even as a friend you need to see how he handles the challenge. I have a feeling it will speak volumes.

I spent a couple of hours driving today with one of my best friends (20 years +) in the car with me.
Half way up the motorway she dropped in to convo that she didn’t believe people had been to the moon 😳 I was a bit speechless, but then had to concentrate on the road and the talk moved on.
I’m still feeling a bit stunned and wondering whether to raise it again; I think I need to just so I know I heard correctly.

Well it can certainly have some adverse effects, that was probably what they were talking about. Lizard people is something else though.

I would have been able to keep my face strsight if he had told me about the Lizard People.

This is sort of thing a young boy sbout 8 would believe in.Not a grown maan.

Best laugh l've had all week. Real belly laugh.

i bet he spends loads of time online talking to other nutters who think that the Holocaust never happened and that Shakeapeare was black.

Say goobye to him.

If I was not married I would have to try so I can ask pertient questions like so which shops do the lizard people shop at? are they more Tesco or Asda?, when they have got home from work do they Netflix and Chill? or whatever we have now moved on too

Do they get their kids to do the 11 plus?

Yes. I find a lot of these conspiracy theorists also link to incel groups and the like. Run. And please don't let him drag you down his rabbit hole which is the other danger.

Lizard People / Illuminati, stuff about the World Economic Forum and "cultural Marxism" all stem from the same age old antisemitic "Jews run the world" conspiracy tropes.
Its not just "nutty theories" - it a dangerous movement of racists which thanks to social media is also increasinly also tied up with the incel / "manosphere" stuff and God knows what else.

So he’s also antisemitic, lovely.

So he’s a conspiracy theorist and a racist, is that really someone who gets you all giddy?

The fact that he has drastically different ( and unusual) beliefs to you would be a red flag to me.
Additional red flags would be the amount of time he would spend talking about the subject, the attempting to drag you down the rabbit hole with him,....
I don't think such extreme beliefs are able to be put on the back burner and "agree to disagree" sort of thing.
Having a friend that you occasionally meet and have to listen about bizarre conspiracy theories are one thing. Having to listen to it constantly from your partner is an entirely different kettle of fish.

Gosh, it’s a shame if he seems otherwise lovely - I’d be a bit concerned that he might not be, though. This "quirk" could be quite a big red flag.
Also you say otherwise he's "perfectly normal"... if he genuinely believes in things like lizard people and listens to people like David Icke, that could just be the tip of the iceberg.
If you got into a relationship with him, and you both settled into it, you might find he lets that side of himself show a lot more - spending time in online forums and going on long rants, which you’d then have to deal with too.
Personally that would be a deal-breaker for me!

Trust me they’re conspiracy theorists. My friend went to a David Icke talk ffs!

You have to be able to introduce him to friends, and be able to not be sat there thinking fgs dont mention lizards...

Nope

I think they prefer the term "people of lizard".

Eurgh no don't do it.
Give it time and it's all you will hear. It will creep into literally every conversation.
These people are as dense and as boring as they come.
Also most of the time they are pretty patronising and smug due to knowing all the worlds secrets while you are just a gullible sheep.
Insufferable.

I'm with one. And it's made me see most people are happy to keep their heads up their arse

Bollocks

Bollocks

Tip of the iceberg.

He actually believes the lizard people thing. Like, actually believes it.

Just like he actually believes his wife just up and left him.

Can you just imagine what their private life was like if this is what he will openly admit to now?

And sorry lovely, but its nonsense to be friends with someone because they "give good hugs" at 55. We aren't teenagers anymore. Find something better in life.

Oh dear, have you been converted too? 😅

You prefer to believe in lizard people? 😂

Many people are critical of the government and the media btw.

And it’s good to be open-minded, but, as the saying goes, not so open-minded that your brain falls out!

Your language is offensive also in case you somehow didn’t realise.

Voted YABU because it is really ridiculous that you would have to ask this.

I don't believe in lizard people.
And it's only offensive if you're a woke snowflake. Getting offended by a word is pathetic