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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Keeping a 3 bedroom council house when your children have grown up

1000 replies

Iwishitwerewarmer · 03/04/2026 07:41

Just pondering - what are everyone’s opinions on a single parent raising their children in a council house/housing association house and staying there once their children have moved out? Should they downsize into a one bed flat/smaller property or is it their right to remain in their home/neighbourhood?

Added extra - they have looked after the property well, have landscaped the garden, installed a new kitchen and generally added value to the property.

OP posts:
pruningmybush · 03/04/2026 12:53

I don't think they should be subsidised by benefits or cheap rent to live there, but if they are paying market rent then fair enough

Hadenough32 · 03/04/2026 12:56

I think when someone is given a contract for a council rental it should be for their need. So as their children hit 21 they should down size each time until their kids have moved out and they only need a one bed place. If people knew from the off that each home would be for a few years they wouldn't be as upset at the move. Council housing should be to help those that need it. And a single couple or person does not need a three bed house. And yes we do all fund council properties because the rent does not cover market value and tax money is used to build them etc.

EwwPeople · 03/04/2026 12:57

Part of the issue is that moving doesn’t just involve downsizing (and leaving your home, memories etc.) . Very often it involves moving completely out of area, in a different town, no friends, no support network, new GP , new dentist (if you’re lucky to get one), no or shoddy public transport and access to other facilities and so on. It’s not just going down the road to a one bedroom flat (ground floor?) or a nice little bungalow.

TheDevilFindsWorkForIdleMums · 03/04/2026 12:57

BatchCookBabe · 03/04/2026 12:10

Good point. (Particularly your last sentence!)

Yeah her last sentence did make a good point.......shame she entirely missed the point being that her mum had children she couldn't house which is why she had the council house and needed the cheap rent in the first place.......

Differentforgirls · 03/04/2026 12:57

ElizabethReed · 03/04/2026 11:05

Oh it definitely was snobby but you have to remember. This was the 90s when there was actually no good reason why anybody wouldn’t go and buy a house.
Properties on that Council estate would sell for 32,000
Starting salaries were 12k if you had two of you working you really did have to be poor to not be able to better yourself at that time

Better yourself with money? The snobbery on here is atrocious.

1457bloom · 03/04/2026 12:58

Hadenough32 · 03/04/2026 12:56

I think when someone is given a contract for a council rental it should be for their need. So as their children hit 21 they should down size each time until their kids have moved out and they only need a one bed place. If people knew from the off that each home would be for a few years they wouldn't be as upset at the move. Council housing should be to help those that need it. And a single couple or person does not need a three bed house. And yes we do all fund council properties because the rent does not cover market value and tax money is used to build them etc.

Exactly, if they knew they would have to leave, they could prepare for it. Then the house would be free for another family.

Lomonald · 03/04/2026 12:58

TheDevilFindsWorkForIdleMums · 03/04/2026 12:57

Yeah her last sentence did make a good point.......shame she entirely missed the point being that her mum had children she couldn't house which is why she had the council house and needed the cheap rent in the first place.......

Fuck me !

ScaryM0nster · 03/04/2026 12:58

hazelberry · 03/04/2026 12:53

Why is it unusable? Do SH tenants not have families who visit? Grandchildren who stay over? Adult kids who might have to return home?

Generally having extra bedrooms for visitors is considered a luxury, not a basic housing need.

And it’s as unusuable as housing as a second home is. They’re also ideal for visitors and having family to stay.

x2boys · 03/04/2026 12:59

Hadenough32 · 03/04/2026 12:56

I think when someone is given a contract for a council rental it should be for their need. So as their children hit 21 they should down size each time until their kids have moved out and they only need a one bed place. If people knew from the off that each home would be for a few years they wouldn't be as upset at the move. Council housing should be to help those that need it. And a single couple or person does not need a three bed house. And yes we do all fund council properties because the rent does not cover market value and tax money is used to build them etc.

There isn't enough housing stock to adequately cover people's need as it is.

BIossomtoes · 03/04/2026 12:59

It’s nothing of the sort.

AirborneElephant · 03/04/2026 12:59

hazelberry · 03/04/2026 12:41

Are you including SH taxpayers or does their tax not count as taxpayers money?

Yes, of course they pay tax just like everyone else. And they are subsidising council housing rents. But that doesn’t mean they should get subsidised in return any more than any other taxpayer.

BIossomtoes · 03/04/2026 12:59

AirborneElephant · 03/04/2026 12:59

Yes, of course they pay tax just like everyone else. And they are subsidising council housing rents. But that doesn’t mean they should get subsidised in return any more than any other taxpayer.

Social housing rents aren’t subsidised.

XenoBitch · 03/04/2026 12:59

EwwPeople · 03/04/2026 12:57

Part of the issue is that moving doesn’t just involve downsizing (and leaving your home, memories etc.) . Very often it involves moving completely out of area, in a different town, no friends, no support network, new GP , new dentist (if you’re lucky to get one), no or shoddy public transport and access to other facilities and so on. It’s not just going down the road to a one bedroom flat (ground floor?) or a nice little bungalow.

Also, people forget that when you move into council/SH, they are gutted. No white goods, no magnolia walls throughout, no carpets.
You have to provide all that yourself. It is stupid to spend out on carpets, paint etc, only to then be made to move a few years later.
If a relative in SH dies, you get 2 weeks to erase any memory of them from the property.

Differentforgirls · 03/04/2026 13:00

Blueshoey484 · 03/04/2026 11:06

Surely you understand that there are people in council and housing association housing that work full time too and pay taxes? Yes rents are subsidised - but that's nothing new

They’re not subsidised. The council don’t make a profit from them unlike private landlords.

caringcarer · 03/04/2026 13:01

BIossomtoes · 03/04/2026 12:33

Market rents are frequently subsidised by the taxpayer. Anyone getting housing benefit is being subsidised, people living in council housing and paying their own rent aren’t. You’re making a profit on your buy to lets, aren’t you @caringcarer? That’s why market rents are higher.

Yes, I am making a small profit on most of my houses. Not on 1 house that is in a higher mortgage fix though. I don't charge full market value because I have tenants I like and trust to look after my houses. I charge £250 less than exact same house next door pay to rent on one hpuse. I make enough profit to cover mortgage, gas and electric certificates, and maintenance repairs as well as about £150 on each house. This money is used to upgrade houses with new carpets, new bathroom or kitchens. There is not much actual pure profit on the houses. Most of my profit gain comes from the value of the house going up in value over time because I keep it well maintained.
increasing over time. Then I can sell off a house, even paying CGT still make a decent profit for my investment.

ElizabethReed · 03/04/2026 13:01

Differentforgirls · 03/04/2026 12:57

Better yourself with money? The snobbery on here is atrocious.

As apposed to what ? staying in poverty 😂

Chatterlyssecret · 03/04/2026 13:02

My mother & Down’s syndrome sister was made to leave our nice council home with good neighbours & moved across town into a small two bedroom terrace next to a prostitute who had men knocking at all hours of the day & night on their door, mum was attacked when she confronted the woman, a fine & probation was all she got handed out, the woman had a young 7 year old son that would be left outside if she was doing her evil business, mum often fed the poor lad after school, so it’s a NO to moving people from their homes when family members have grown up compulsory.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 03/04/2026 13:04

H3342 · 03/04/2026 11:45

The list may well "go on" (old Bob next door would be lost without Mabel popping in to seeing him etc) but again, no reason is good enough IMO for someone my age to be rattling around in a 3/4/5 bed house when families are crammed into tiny accommodation.

What has "dignity" got to do with it 😂? What about the dignity of a family who have 4 kids in one room? An older person can keep their dignity in a smaller place you know

Edited

Does that apply to people who own their own home as well?

ElizabethReed · 03/04/2026 13:04

Chatterlyssecret · 03/04/2026 13:02

My mother & Down’s syndrome sister was made to leave our nice council home with good neighbours & moved across town into a small two bedroom terrace next to a prostitute who had men knocking at all hours of the day & night on their door, mum was attacked when she confronted the woman, a fine & probation was all she got handed out, the woman had a young 7 year old son that would be left outside if she was doing her evil business, mum often fed the poor lad after school, so it’s a NO to moving people from their homes when family members have grown up compulsory.

Oh goodness don’t light the sex work is real work fuse

Differentforgirls · 03/04/2026 13:05

ProjectHailMary · 03/04/2026 11:15

They are subsidised. See my first post on the thread. It’s financially illiterate to suggest otherwise and so silly that this refusal by some posters to accept this basic fact undermines any attempts at worthwhile discussion on the subject.

I didn’t read it. Far too long.

caringcarer · 03/04/2026 13:05

hazelberry · 03/04/2026 12:32

SH tenants are council tax payers too.

Yes they might be but everyone else pays council tax and either a full mortgage or full market rent as well. Surely you can see social housing tenants especially council tenants pay a lot less overall.

Differentforgirls · 03/04/2026 13:07

ElizabethReed · 03/04/2026 11:17

It equates to the liability on the taxpayer being indefinite versus having a natural end Date, which is why thatcher sold them all off

That went well…

Pepperlee · 03/04/2026 13:07

hazelberry · 03/04/2026 12:39

You don't know the first thing about SH. My mum and dad were allocated their council house in the 70s due to the slum clearance of the house some of us grew up in. They both worked.

Don't worry though because they are both dead now and the house went to another family.

Yes that was the norm in the late 50s, 60s and 70s when the regeneration was happening. All those people had to be rehoused.

LakieLady · 03/04/2026 13:07

And don't even get me started on the people that buy council houses and then sell them on, taking that house off the SH market forever whilst enjoying a nice profit. It's gross.

I think if RTB had never been introduced, attitudes might be very different. We wouldn't have such a shortage of social housing if RTB had never happened, all those homes would still be part of the social housing stock and would eventually have been passed on to other families in need.

I know of two different property developers who buy ex-council properties, tart them up, and lease them back to local authorities who use them as temporary housing for homeless families. How bonkers is it that councils are paying top dollar to lease back houses that they used to own and were forced to sell off on the cheap?

XenoBitch · 03/04/2026 13:08

caringcarer · 03/04/2026 13:05

Yes they might be but everyone else pays council tax and either a full mortgage or full market rent as well. Surely you can see social housing tenants especially council tenants pay a lot less overall.

You don't get cheaper council tax in council/SH. The rent is the only thing that is less (in most cases).
I don't think it is fair to compare it to mortgages, as some people have tiny mortgages...

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