AIBU to feel harassed by charity chuggers targeting women in public?

[Bertiebiscuit]

I'm so sick of male charity chuggers, i watch them always bear down on older lone women - the "Dorothy Donor" stereotype is still operating i guess- i am on a fixed income, cannot afford to give money to charities, although I'm a regular buyer in charity shops and always donate goods when i have a clear out. As if i would give out my card details in public anyway, they must think we're stupid! And all that fake "charming" act they put on - hello 'young' lady, i like your hat/coat/haircut blah blah 🤮. Long story short i ignore them and march past,but lately several have felt they can shout snarky comments as i walk away, basically is amounting to street harassment,bog standard male bullsh*t and entitlement. I confess that the most recent one i gave him the finger. I feel as though I'm just prey, as women and girls always seem to be, and it makes me furious.

Oh well, maybe it was a bucket, can't remember. But yes, I know, they're not allowed to rattle things. What can I say, I was flattered 😂

Actually, they absolutely do. Chuggers are trained to target women, particularly older women, as they are considered to be the easiest targets, I've read lots of threads on the internet where chuggers give insider information, and this is repeated on every thread.

And you can absolutely bet no chugger shouts abuse at a man who ignores them.

They're not allowed (legally) to block your path. Wanker.

I liked Alan carrs quote on last one laughing- ‘they’re called chuggers, charity muggers, but I call them chunts’

@MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack

I gather you're suggesting that the individual is saying 'no' in an aggressive way and thus receiving a rude response in return?

That could be the case, but there will almost certainly be a cross-section of chuggers who are rude without any justification.

If they shout unacceptable comments, then you turn around, make a note of their name and complain to the charity.

Head down, headphones in and they usually ignore me. However I have ones call out to me, jump in front of me and block my path, wanted to punch him and had one call out "so you don't care about deaf children then?" as if that would shame me into dashing back and giving my him bank details.

Why are you so defensive of chuggers when so many people have had bad experiences? It's very odd.

Victim blame much?

I am sure that's true, but if you are repeatedly getting rude or aggressive responses from chuggers, then I would respectfully suggest that it's worth changing your own response to see if you get a different reaction.

I walk through a busy city centre every lunchtime and I'm approached by these people daily. Am I just unusually lucky that they're never rude to me?

Only on mumsnet would you get called desperate for enjoying chatting to attractive members of the opposite sex 😂

saying no thank you doesn’t seem to deter them,

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-19316167

Complaining directly to the charity or to the Fundraising Regulator (0300 999 3407). Note the charity name, time, location, and the fundraiser’s ID if possible

It is not permitted to stand directly outside shop entrances or station entrances. They must be a minimum of 3ms.

I'm not defensive of chuggers at all, I don't like the approach at all, but the charities that employ them are to blame for that, rather than people who are just trying to make a living.

There is no excuse for them being rude or abusive, of course, and if that ever happened to me, I would report it to the relevant charity. It's just that I see a lot of people being pretty rude to the chuggers as well, or just not knowing how to handle them. That doesn't justify the rude response, of course, but if people don't like the rudeness, I'm suggesting that they could try a different response themselves to see if it makes any difference.

Of course, if people would rather continue to put up with the rudeness while complaining about it on the Internet, then that's their prerogative.

Well not really. They are persistent and honestly I don’t have the time to discuss it with them. I haven’t met one who keeps on after being told to fuck off though

It depends on how well the rules are enforced in the area. Some places are really strict and charities have to pitch for spots under regulations. If they don't comply they don't get a pitch. Other areas don't have the same level of bylaws /restrictions and enforcement.

Or ‘you mean you can see me 😱’ 🤣

Im more annoyed about the self check out tills asking you to donate to who-knows-what or the BBC/Red Nose day trying to get money by using innocent kids.

I fully understand the link between paying a decent salary and getting the right skilled person for the job.

What I object to is the ordinary working person /SAHM/ pensioners being pounced on by these charities, every time they leave their home to go shopping / pick up a loaf of bread, or attend a hospital appointment. 😡

I would respectfully suggest you rethink your stance on who's to blame here. If a woman had been sexually assaulted or abused by men . I hope you wouldn't just tell them, maybe the men reacted that way because you were too softly spoken or he called you a bitch because you said no too firmly, just because you hadn't experienced the same when you'd turned down men in the past
These chuggers are targeting women and following them, refusing to let them get past by blocking their way, calling them names when they say they aren't interested. This is not the fault of women just wanting to go about their day not wanting to engage with these people

Um, yeah. 🤔 Context is everything, no?🙄

"Join our brigade of charity marketing workers and you too could target passers by with your creepy, unwanted attention!"

You know there are far easier, normal and readily accessible ways of chatting up the opposite sex without appearing sleazy, right? 😂

I once nipped to the local shop and some woman had a huge stall set up just outside the door for some dog charity

She collared me just as I was coming out and demanded my bank details

I said no,I wasnt handing out my personal data to anyone but I would shove a pound in a bucket

She didnt have a bucket so I wandered off-only to have her shout after me 'GUESS YOU DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT DOGS YOU SILLY BITCH!'

I reported her to the charity and heard nothing back

They need to be banned

We had the British Heart Foundation at the local leisure centre recently. Stopped us to ask if they could talk to us about CPR. We politely declined as we needed to get DD home, showered and fed after swimming. We both are fully up to date with CPR techniques with our work anyway.

Twatty guy said “Hope you never need CPR”🙄

I always did the polite "no thank you" then I actually replayed thw whole interaction in my head"

Them- "Would you like to help children living with cancer?"

Me- "no thank you"

Again with the women victim mentality. My dh gets them much more than me. In fact just yesterday we were together and they approached him not me!