Thanks so much for taking the time to write really useful comments. The AIBU is about whether I should have expected the charity to keep the issue as sensitive, but I understand that context would help.
Nothing to do with trans! No safeguarding issues.
I am a parent at the school.
The charity is internationally recognised as providing excellent training.
I have undertaken some of their training in the past and have been involved with it in other ways, 10-15 years ago. I own their teaching materials.
How do I know what is happening?
My children have told me.
I saw it myself on a school app that posts what children have done.
I saw it also at a school function.
Since I have accidentally called out the school already to the charity, and regret doing so, I want to be careful not to repeat my mistake online.
So I'll try to give an analogy.
Imagine I am a mid ranking tennis player.
My kids PE lessons at school are taken by a qualified PE teacher who shows them videos of other people playing sports in every lesson. They have a racquet but don't demonstrate using it. They will show videos of shot putt and javelin to small kids. Nice introduction but maybe not quite right for their age. Some of the videos are quite good eg BBC, others are just of kids running about in a field, sport indecipherable, from youtube. Sometimes the videos aren't even about sports but something related to the season. The video is approximately half of the lesson, and the other half they get to have a go themselves and each get one chance to hit a ball.
I have been to lots of tennis schools due to my job, and in every case we get on and play tennis rather than watching videos. Sure, you can study advanced technique by watching the pros but in the under ten age group I would argue that it's a bit of a waste of time to spend part of every lesson watching other people on a screen rather than participating.
This goes on for several months.
When the kids watch an advert where a top tennis player has teamed up with Coke, I ask the school not to show junk food adverts. They try to cover it up but also say the lesson was a gateway to learning about tennis.
I make a second complaint that under fives are also being taught PE using videos as the basis of their lesson, while on the other hand the school emails us about reducing screen time for that age group. (they have an attached nursery)
Then at a school sports day they show a video where a pupil is holding a tennis racquet like a gun, imitating a character from popular culture. I talk afterwards to the head of department and say it's me who has been complaining that I think the videos are out of hand and I would love to discuss the curriculum. I'm waved off in irritation and told there doesn't need to be any restriction on videos.
At this point I contact the charity. The charity arranges top class tennis matches which I used to take part in, with a teaching arm on how to teach tennis.
I call them and say, I have this issue with the school using videos and I know your style of teaching uses none at all. I'd love your help in trying to work out how to talk to the school about this matter.
They don't reply but senior staff from the school invite me in to tell me what a naughty parent I have been for not trusting them to teach and for contacting another organisation. They also listened carefully and are going to report back. My issue is not with the school's eventual response but as a previous poster really got right - the manner in which the story came back round to the school via the grapevine from an organisation I respect.