AIBU to expect confidentiality after raising concerns with a charity?

[HarvestSky]

I was dissatisfied with the teaching methods in a specialist subject at school. I contacted a local charity that specialises in that subject and provides teaching for teachers. I wanted to find out whether what the school was doing was best practice, and how they could improve through training courses. However I must have mentioned the school's name rather than keeping it generic as I wish I had done. Now the charity has fed back to the school through personal contacts that I told them xyz about the school's teaching, and the teachers are annoyed.
Should I have expected a reasonable degree of confidentiality from the charity or am AIBU for dobbing the school in?

🥱

So the school changed the KS3 curriculum? . Hours of extra preparation and making materials, more budget used up, on the request of one parent?
Really?

Interesting update, @HarvestSky .
So, the school is teaching something wrongly, in your view, so you've contacted a charity to improve it?
One question; your training on this subject was with this charity 10-15 years ago. How confident are you that this is not now outdated?

well she's contacted a charity to ask if it's being taught wrongly. Not for them to take action to improve it.

Again you are missing the point. The question was not whether the OP was correct or misguided in her thoughts about the school, or whether she had a right to approach them, it was whether the charity should have maintained confidentiality. The OP was checking her line of thought with the charity and presumably once she had their thoughts she would decide if she had a valid line of concern she needed to take further - sounds a reasonable through process to me. But the charity effectively removed that option from her (accidently or not).

You are expanding it to something it never was, so we are answering two different questions so my response will not align with your direction.

Firefighters and teachers are too totally different scenarios and therefore not comparable.

But as a point of interest, I do believe that if a parent has a concern about something their child has been taught in class and you believe it is inappropriate (if that is indeed the issue) then you absolutely have the right to question it, to seek further info to make an informed decision on whether you have an issue that needs taking further. But that is NOT what the OP is asking.

No. I am not missing the point. I am well aware of her original query, however, it raises other questions and points. This happens on discussion threads. The discussion often gets broadened. People contribute in different ways.
You have totally missed my point. I never compared firefighters to teachers. I just said that I am aware of my area of expertise. A charity course 10-15 years ago wouldn't change that.
Should the charity have shared her details?
Probably not. I hope that allays your concerns about the question asked.

Ok
It sounded very much as if she wanted changes made.
Can you clarify, @HarvestSky ?

Imagine the teacher is say 45 with a dodgy hip and teaching gymnastics would you expect them, to demonstrate themselves or put on a video to demonstrate?
You realise a sports club will teach things very differently, follow a different curriculum and have different learning objectives to a school?
I also think you have got a hell of a cheek telling a qualified specialist PE teacher how yo do their job based on a bit of dports coaching you have done. Apples and pears!

I’m sure someone better versed in data privacy could weigh in here, but as I understand it the charity shouldn’t be sharing your personal details with others without your permission.

On an ethical level they’re clearly at fault to share your complaint without asking, after you’ve contacted them for impartial advice on how to resolve the issue.

She hasn't complained to an external body, she has asked for information so she can make an informed decision on whether she has a point or not. The charity were then indiscreet and potentially made this into something it wasn't and it could be conceived as a complaint when the OP hasn't made that decision yet. You are making this into something she hasn't said or asked.

Is this anything to do with dyslexia? If so there are charities who have methods that may work with individual very compliant children. Apologies if I’m barking up the wrong tree.

Sorry, I shouldn't have said complained. I was just trying to demonstrate that if someone did that to her in the workplace she might not be thrilled.

But surely that is the point at hand. She had spoken to the school and got nowhere and so she sought to clarify her stance with a charity who she believes know best practice and presumably had the charity provided that information, she could have made an informed decision on the way forward which could have been in the form of a complaint to the school or Ofsted or she may have decided she was wrong - we will never know. She has never claimed to be an expert and sought to factually check the situation before progressing further. The charity, potentially unwittingly, deprived her of that option and unnecessarily escalated the matter.

People are reading into this things which have never been said at the point they replied.

Not an odd take at all. What an odd thing to say.

I didn’t say she was rude but stand by saying she was entitled. She has some knowledge biy isn’t an expert.

She acted entitled by her actions and yes the school was going to figure it out. She is worried about the wrong .

OP, does the school have enough funding to buy a racquet for each child to use so they can all actually spend time playing?

I have been to lots of tennis schools due to my job, and in every case we get on and play tennis rather than watching videos.

I would think that a tennis school has specialist equipment and specialist teachers and more resources.

I'm going to assume this is about music and pupils don't all get to spend time playing. I can remember one drum kit and maybe two guitars for the entire class, and that was 30+ years ago.

It was an ANALOGY.
it doesn’t mean the problem has anything to do with sport,

but to your questions I’d expect my kids to have physical movement at PE and not videos of movement. If the PE teacher can’t do it, she’s in the wrong job

You said "Well, we all have a "right" to do this. I wouldn't waste the time of the local firefighters by suggesting they adopt different practices, because I am not an expert.
However, it happens in schools a lot, and it very much depends what "heard" means." So you are comparing it.

Perhaps you should train to be a teacher and then see what it's like. So many things are controlled by curriculum, targets, time limitations, personalities and perspectives of all staff in departments or promoted posts, let alone the learners individual needs and skill levels. Difficult to comment perhaps without having waited to see if you drip fed more of your ideas.

Oh my god! Mea culpa! 😁
Pick at this all night if you want to. Fine.
I made various points, but carry on with this one 😁

OP I think you’ve come across as a bit of a busy body. Using your analogy, DD actually does throw shot & javelin, she’s very good at it. At school they do athletics in the summer, the PE staff are generalists and have nowhere near the time or coaching ability to teach 170 kids how to throw a shot or javelin properly. The vast majority of them aren’t particularly interested in learning to throw seriously. I’ve not asked DD’s throws coach to interfere with the school PE staff and explain where they are going wrong. She just carries on with her external coach (and demonstrates when asked to in PE lessons).

OP you sound seriously over involved with this and a bit of a nightmare for the teachers who will have much more important things to do and who will resent you taking up their time with your own trivial hobbyhorse. Now it looks like you want to start complaining about the charity as well! I would suggest getting some perspective and learning that you can’t always get your own way in everything.

OP, you can't demand the school changes it's pedagogy. You have raised your concerns - if they wanted to fake them on board, they would have. Contacting the charity was never going to achieve anything.

There are other schools - you need to send your DC somewhere else if you are really that bothered.

And does the charity claim to offer confidentiality? Or did you request it and they agreed?

If neither, I don't think they have done anything wrong.

The whole thing seems a bit weird, to be honest with you.

just catching up… so tennis was only an analogy… not the actual thing?

Yes