AIBU to expect confidentiality after raising concerns with a charity?

[HarvestSky]

I was dissatisfied with the teaching methods in a specialist subject at school. I contacted a local charity that specialises in that subject and provides teaching for teachers. I wanted to find out whether what the school was doing was best practice, and how they could improve through training courses. However I must have mentioned the school's name rather than keeping it generic as I wish I had done. Now the charity has fed back to the school through personal contacts that I told them xyz about the school's teaching, and the teachers are annoyed.
Should I have expected a reasonable degree of confidentiality from the charity or am AIBU for dobbing the school in?

why haven’t you contacted the board of governors?

Believe it or not, but there’s more to teaching than subject knowledge- of course, that’s very important- but just having that, doesn’t make you an expert on what “best practice” in teaching and learning is. By all means, do your training and give it a go OP. There’s a teacher shortage after all.
I’m sure that some random client (who is not trained to do your role) going to a third party charity organisation to criticise how you do your job and “suggest” how you can do it differently wouldn’t thrill you either.
The organisation were right to pass your email to the school - they are not a go-between for unhappy parents or a vehicle for parents to tell teachers how to do their job.
If you felt fobbed off when you raised the concern, you should have followed the next stage in the complaints procedure.

I agree with @ILoveLeopard245
What is it that you think they should be doing differently?

The charity did not inform me that they would contact the school but they have a personal contact who knows the teaching staff. Which I would have thought would have been a good thing!

Who would be the correct contact at the charity to find out how the information was passed on?

I don't know the name of the person I spoke to because the person I was trying to reach wasn't in that day so she just took the details to pass on.

I contacted the charity precisely because I am not a teacher so I wanted advice!

I have never contacted a board of governors but this is a good suggestion, thank you

Of you're that bothered, ré train and go and teach it. Otherwise you come across as interfering and trying to tell people how to do their job. How would you react to someone telling you how to do your job? Then complaining to a higher body about your work?

Teaching has many nuances and unless you are in the room for the lesson, you have no idea how the staff are delivering material.

Ah you wanted to be weaponised to go in and tell them how shit they are at your specialist subject? And everyone would cheer and clap and do it right now you’d told them?
it’s really giving me Beverly Goldberg vibes! 😆

to all the MN teachers… I salute you! Could not deal with what you deal with ever!

@HarvestSky what exactly are they not doing that you in your expert opinion believe that they should? And again what subject is it?
drama and too many musicals (where your dc isn’t getting picked for parts)
or science and dangerous practice?

Why wouldn't you think the charity would talk to the school first to establish what their current practice is before talking to you?

Why do you think your way is better? You aren't a teacher.

Because 'my' way is what I learnt from the charity, who run teaching courses

I can't think why the teachers wouldn't feel heartfelt gratitude to you for pointing out their shortcomings to a third party, and surely they will full embrace the benefits your recommended training will provide, thus bringing their practice in line with your views on how they should teach their subject. I mean, what human being wouldn't react positively to this approach?

This.
It's impossible to advise if we dont know what the alleged poor practice is, and whether it constitutes a safety ir other safeguarding risk

Why does mn think parents can’t complain when things aren’t right because teachers are perfect? Op spoke to school, was still unhappy so sought further advice which she planned to use as evidence to support her when speaking to the school again in the hope of a resolution. Totally normal.

If you were "dissatisfied with the teaching methods of a specialist subject" then of course another way of dealing with it would be to support your child in how they receive those methods. I mean, it wasn't yourself being taught was it? And there must have been something that prompted your "dissatisfaction", and that can only be a negative perception or outcome for your child.

I think you were ridiculous to go to the charity. The school will have a published procedure for parental concerns, including what to do if you don't think they are responding to your satisfaction.
But instead you've decided to take it elsewhere. Reminds me of squabbling siblings stropping and saying "right then, I'm telling on you".

You have not really addressed this productively and probably caused a bit of professional tension somewhere along the line.

Go back to the roots of it-why were you even dissatisfied?

This can only ever be about trans somehow. You just know.

Your unwillingness to disclosure the subject involved makes this whole post pointless. No one can tell you if you were unreasonable or not when they have such scant information.

So you’ve been on a teaching course for the subject?

I admit that this was my first thought too!

I think it’s impossible to know what response to give without knowing the subject. If it’s maths and the teacher is saying that people should do algebra based on star signs (absurd example), then of course it needs to be challenged. If it’s pshe and children are being taught about subjects that a fundamentalist religious charity disapproves of then perhaps nots

Were you in the room when the lesson you disagree with was taught?

What are the results like for that topic ?

As a Governor, we meet with Leadership, and Subject Leads to go through their improvement plans for their subjects, twice a year. There is already scrutiny from Governors, and subjects where results are lower than anticipated will get special attention. If the results are fine, it’s unlikely Governors will do anything. The “style” is a school issue, teachers have different styles, and thats ok.

Charities who's business involves disclosures from service users typically do offer a level of confidentiality. They will be bound by GDPR legislation for one thing, but generally have additional policies that require consent to share your details with third parties.
However, charities would not usually progress a users matter by relying on one of their workers knowing the third party socially and having a quiet word. So the whole thing sounds a little... 'informal'.
Ask them for a copy of their confidentiality and GDPR policies and if they've breeched them, ask for their complaints procedure. In the absence of any, contact the manager/chair of trustees.

Is this something to do with PHSE / religion?

Who says it's better apart from the charity?

Who would be the correct contact at the charity to find out how the information was passed on?

God, @HarvestSky don't contact the charity to try to find out how this happened! That would be a really inappropriate demand on their time. They aren't the kind of charity that has to have strict confidentiality protocols around their interactions. They don't owe you a duty of privacy, so your questioning of them about this wouldn't be a way of helping them to tighten up on lax procedures. It would just be a slightly unhinged way of roping strangers in to your anxiety about what the school thinks of you.

It doesn't even seem certain that they mentioned your name -- rather than the school just putting two and two together. If they did mention your name that's not ideal, but it probably reflects the fact that they aren't working in a context/role where confidentiality has to be a taught procedure

I get a sense your motivations were connected to power (you feeling power and demonstrating it- “I’ve been on a course you know”) and being “right” (because you clearly know best).
Perhaps your own school experience and the emotional response it brings up that has stopped you from communicating with school directly, using the appropriate channels. However there’s nothing to stop you from accessing the complaints procedure and following it now. That would have been the more productive approach in the first place OP but perhaps the charity passing on your concern will allow you to have an open dialogue so you can share your wisdom and expertise.