Revenge fantasy plea

[NaughtyFantasyofRevenge]

AIBU to ask you to help me plot some fantasy revenge?

I am divorcing my abusive STBXH thanks to you lovely lot helping me to recognise it as abuse after I posted a couple of AIBUs.

True to form he is being horrible. Utterly vile. I’ve lost friends. I’ve lost money. He’s making choices that negatively impact the DC.

I am rising above it. I’m not taking the bait. I’m focusing on my wellbeing and being the best parent I can be.

But I’m angry. I feel powerless. The law sucks. I have no recourse. I need an outlet.

So I’m going to start plotting fantasy revenge scenarios.

First one: I know something about him that would destroy his reputation and lose him friends all over our small community. I fantasise about telling one person in ‘confidence’ knowing they would likely break it because they are a gossip. I’d have done nothing wrong but it would have the whole town talking about him negatively.

Anyone want to join me in a little evil fantasy revenge? What could I do? Small or big? Silly or serious! Or share your revenge stories. No judgement from me.

To be clear I won’t action anything and I’m not condoning revenge (mostly) but I really need to let out my feeling of powerlessness somehow!!

Ok I did this years ago - horrible vile neighbour. When I moved I used her email and mobile number for spam purposes. Like yes I’m interested in David Lloyd. Yes I might have an STD. Yes I am interested in a Vauxhall corsa etc. please call me at x time to discuss.

When I see dog poo on the ground, I always imagining rubbing the owner’s face and eyes in it.

Nair or Immac in his shampoo and conditioner?

I assumed it was your classroom phone number and that this female pupil wouldn’t write any more to spite you, Mrs Weary. Proxy revenge - delicious! 😆

I’ve told this story before on MN. One betrayed wife returned the demanded half of a dinner set wedding present once she’d smashed every piece. Oops!

Ooooh, husband no.1 who had an affair and said my miscarriage was just nothing - itching powder in his underwear, weedkiller in his aftershave and cleaned the loo with his toothbrush. There were other things I did that I can't remember and I don't regret any of them.

My petty but felt good one was to find all the photos I had of us or him ( real photos) I wrote on every one in black pen either cheat or liar put them in a big envelope and posted them through his letterbox, his daughter who I saw a while later said he was not amused, OK it was not anything major but it felt good at the time of doing it

I used to clean the toilet with my ex-husband’s toothbrush when he pissed me off 😂

Grass seed takes too long, may not have enough sunlight indoors and needs soil.

Use cress.

A woman I met was once married to a RAF Dog Handler, Sergeant in charge of a platoon.

He was sent away for a week training or something as it was obvious the marriage was on the way out.

No prizes for what she did when he was away but she is very fondly remembered by the entire platoon...........

I soothed myself back to sleep last night with fantasies of keying "CHEATING CUNT" onto his prize BMW.

The other one is firing a crossbow at short rage into his bollocks so he can never have sex again.

I’d love to know what she did @JohnofWessex

You don't need to put itching powder on toilet paper @BotterMon /OP - just buy that ruddy awful stuff coated in shea butter and it will give you an itch anyway!

I think it's a necessary part of the process....you're still in early days so no harm in fantasy revenge for the time being I say 😄

My mums ex took the shower head, and the left one of every pair of her shoes…

She’d caught him with the OW so not sure where he got off with the revenge on her!

For some strange reason, I was one of the teachers she actually liked.

Shw did submit her coursework and passed her exam.

I assume he does his own ironing and doesn't send it out ro be done? If so make sure the iron water has some wee in it so he won't know why his clothes smell weird but they will. (Someone i know, not my own idea!)

She looked at the ceiling - a lot!

👌 I remember moderating GCSE coursework and the thoroughly obnoxious member of the department cow commented that one of my pupils wouldn’t have produced work of such high quality for her. Though there had evidently been discord, no overt acts of revenge took place…sadly…

I'm getting flashbacks to a HoD who was fairly mean to me when I was a young teacher...

I bought myself a nice suit in the M&S sale and got a lot of compliments at work.
HoD: "Oh, M&S is all right if it's just for work."

Complete cow.

When we got word that we were getting inspected, she went off sick the next day...

Oh, John!

@WearyAuldWumman Oh, how the mighty are fallen!

I turned a pair of underpants inside out and rubbed them in the loft insulation, gave them a bit of a shake, turned them back to the right side, put them back in the drawer, a few pairs down and waited 😂

What happened? An interested third person is asking.

This thread has cheered me right up. I’ve had about 14 messages since I posted, every single one of them is goady and mean. And looooong. Where do these people find the time to put so much effort into being twats?! If he’d put as much effort into personal development may be we wouldn’t be here.

Loving some of these ideas. I’m not sure I could do any of them. But loving the fantasy.