AIBU to expect neighbours to keep loud kids indoors before 9am?

[GreenSingingFrog]

New neighbours moved in recently a few doors down, and now the nice weather has started their 3 kids have been out in the garden each morning. It starts at 7.30am and they’re very loud and scream constantly.

I don’t mind on a weekday, but it’s the same time at the weekend too. It’s waking us up and we’re not even next door so must be worse for those closer.

We didn’t let ours out until about 9am at least at the weekend and I’ve brought them inside on occasion when they’ve been arguing and screaming, to sort it out without disturbing everyone around.

AIBU to think they shouldn’t let the kids out until more like 9am if they’re going to be screaming continuously?

They shouldn't be screaming continuously really... even after 9am

The summer threads have started early this year on MN.

I doorstepped and complained when a few doors up did the same. Definitely yanbu

Annoying.

However I'd take 7.30am as my neighbour goes into the garden at 5.45am (every bloody morning) to go in his shed. You can hear him moaning at the dog (loudly) and scraping the shed door across the patio 😡

Close your window. If that is not enough, invest in better soundproofing windows. Children have a right to enjoy their own gardens.

I think it is wonderful children playing outside instead off being stuck inside watching screens.

Talk to your neighbours. Agree about noise at the weekend. I wonder if they don't like the noise too and let their children in the garden to get some relative peace themselves.

And people wonder why I prefer the winter months.

But surely they’ve got all day to do that? I totally agree, I like to see children outside enjoying themselves, over spending all day watching a screen/gaming.
However, consideration should be given to neighbours.

OP, fortunately ours weren’t particularly loud, but we still wouldn’t let them play noisy games in the garden until after 9am. Are they approachable?

People just have no consideration for others anymore

Our kids will "scream", there is no way around that. It's their natural communication mode, particularly when outdoor with the distance. They'll grow out of it 🙏

But that's the reason they're not allowed out until 9 on the weekend (we might allow 8:30 on weekdays but that's rare anyway).

Yes - the being outside isn’t the issue, it’s tue allowing them to scream!

You’re right, children outside is great.
However the nice weather and fresh air is for us all to enjoy so if other people have to close windows because kids are screaming (which is a horrible noise) then it’s not fair.

Agree with the screaming being the issue - I won't let ddog out before 9am because she simply cannot resist a woof when she wees. The good thing about kids is you can explain to them about other people and give them the choice in their behaviour - but this all relies upon the parents not being dicks tbh.

I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to let them know their noise is disturbing you, they might not realise it's loud if they're used to that level. Personally I think it's inconsiderate of them to be making noise that early at the weekend so hopefully they will leave it an hour or two next time.

How are you supposed to bring up functional and emotionally aware adults when you enable selfish behaviour in kids. They definitely should not be outside at that time, let alone screaming.
I love the sound of kids playing outside but there needs to be a balance. I have just moved house and one of the reasons was exactly this. And yes I am a parent.

Never told your kids to be quieter; to think of others?

I have a large family, with lots of children (varying ages), they all play, they all enjoy themelves and when they get together there are lots of them, they are NOT allowed to scream continuously.

Adults have a right to enjoy their gardens (and indoor spaces with windows closed) too.

Children playing isnt the issue. Its parents not parenting.

That was my initial reaction too!

Here we go… months of threads coming about kids playing outside, BBQs, music and parties in the garden, topless lawn mowing and leaving the washing out overnight! 😊

Of course children have the right to enjoy their gardens and of course it’s wonderful for dc to play outside! No one is disputing that!

I love hearing children play outside!

It’s the timing that is in dispute and I am wholly with the op. There is an appropriate time to do things.

You wouldn’t think it appropriate for an adult to sing in their garden at 4 am at the top of their voice would you?

What about a neighbour’s right to lie in bed on weekends in peace until 9 am after a hard week of commuting or whatever?

And why should neighbours keep their bedroom windows shut when the weather is warm?

I am in my sixties and I can still remember my parents telling my brother and me to keep our voices down when our elderly next door neighbour was sitting in her garden on a Sunday.

Teaching your dc consideration for others is a good thing! A civilised society works best when people operate a little give and take.

Having said all that, I have every sympathy for parents whose young children wake up at 5 am, as the morning can seem very long, but it’s always possible before 9 am to take them for a walk in the other direction, out of the front door.

Unfortunately this is domestic noise and there is nothing you can do about it other than speak to the parents and hope they will co-operate. If they take it amiss then you may find the kids get noisier.

This is the kind of situation where, if the property is rented, owners think it is acceptable to snitch to the landlord. 99.9% of lanldords will refuse to get involved since there is nothing in the standard lease about children playing.

The way around it is to actively parent them and bring them in when they scream. And if they keep repeating it, then the consequence of that is that they don't get to play outside until they can do it without screaming.

Children shouldn’t be screaming, it’s really annoying. I never allowed my children to scream, and they understood from an early age to be considerate of others. We all live in a society, we should be conscious of our effect on others, and try to get along. Children can play without screaming.

YANBU OP.

One of my DCs is a screamer, she’s referred for ASD and ADHD diagnosis and as soon as she gets the slightest bit excited, overwhelmed or just when she forgets, she shouts or screams. We’ve been trying to stop her but it just isn’t working. But we wouldn’t let our kids out in the garden at 7.30 with her making noise like that, we’ve only just opened the doors now.

Some people just don't care, id be having a word myself or put a note through if you know which house it is.

Our neighbours have their kids outside any time between 6 and 630 am 7 days a week.
They've been talking of moving.... 🤞
It's awful.

Neurotypical children can learn to moderate the volume of their voice from an early age. All that's needed is parents who care enough to bother teaching them.

Anyone who can't teach their child not to scream or can't be bothered to try, really ought to entertain them indoors so that neighbours can sleep. There are plenty of options other than screens but, of course, they require effort from the adults responsible.