To think this was unfair, and to take time off for mental health.

[Dawnchorus1]

I work in the civil service, and after returning from mat leave was given the choice of returning to my current job full time or taking a demotion if I wanted to do 3 or 4 days.

I took the demotion. This was nearly 5 years ago. I've contributed fully and enthusiastically in my role and been successful in working on big projects and having my ideas taken forward consistently (we work in an environment where most projects have a few people creating initial ideas which the clients then chose from). This despite being managed by 'replacement', being a single parent to my son, having little family support and having lost my mum suddenly last year, and have been working very hard at keeping my shit together.

We've gone through a restructure recently which has been horrendous for most involved and taken it's toll (multiple applications to apply for our own jobs etc). I kept my job luckily. Then a position opened up for my previous role. My son being at school now I thought it would be a good time to get my career back on track - up my hours and resume previous role.

So put in application. Got interview. Knew others were going for it, but being the one who had actually done the job before thought I had more than a good chance of getting it.

Invites for interview were sent out on the Friday - which is non working day for me so I didn't see it until the Monday morning, meaning I Iost a weekend of prep time. Interviews scheduled for the following Monday, so only a week's notice for me. We had to prepare a presentation for the interview (with no time scheduled during work to do so). This also happened to be the week of my mum's 1 year anniversary of her sudden death, and the week in which we buried her ashes. I see a therapist and the week before this she said she thought I was depressed - because I said I was struggling to get out of bed and do basic things like the washing up and laundry.

I worked hard to prepare a presentation. Long story short I didn't get the job - despite being told I had done a really good presentation. Because I 'didn't have enough examples on the behaviour and strength questions'. Despite having worked with these people closely for 5-10 years. They know I can solve a problem, they've seen me do it every week. Yes I could have had better answers. But last week was the worst week for me to have to prepare for this. I put the time and effort I had in me getting my presentation in good shape.

I'm absolutely devastated. I feel like crap and need advice about what to do next. Think I'll need to take some time off for mental health reasons, how do I go about this? I feel so angry. I'm not sure if they were allowed to do what they did with demoting me when returning from mat leave.

She's not picked up with me at all about it today. When she let me know the news yesterday she saw I was upset and I did briefly mention that it had been a tough week for me and she said yes I know it's a hard time of year (she knows what happened this time last year!)

If you had put as nuch effort into applying as you have this thread you may have had a better chance

I have applied for roles or promotions and got them or not and moved on you seem fixated

The lack of empathy on this thread is something else.

the op is talking about something that’s happened in the last two days and is ongoing into next week. That is hardly fixated.

have you never been in a redundancy and consultation process? They can be very unsettling.

@PollyBell really???? Is there any need for that comment? Grow up. Honestly I am sick to death of unnecessary bitchiness.

Everyone bangs on about men being an issue on this forum but there are so many toxic females that need to take a long hard look at themselves.

Agreed!!!!!

I was bullied in school by girls and this forum just reminds me that some people never really grow up.

OP remember few people are very good at handling these situations as either an employee or manager.

take some time for yourself if you can - holiday as part of Easter maybe better than sick leave.

If you can, try and deliver your best in your role. This may help you move into a frame of mind where you can think about other options

My application for an internal job 'disappeared' and HR never got it. Company policy was you had to pass your application to your line manager first and they submit it.

After the post was filled I emailed HR to ask for some feed back. Of course they'd no idea who I was. My manager proudly boasted that he wasn't letting me leave his team.

I was furious but nothing could be done. Until.....................

Another vacancy for the same role came up a few months later. As luck would have it, this prick was on paternity leave. As he wouldn't be back before applications closed, I emailed it direct to HR. Who made an exception as I didn't technically have a line manager at that point 😁

When he got back and found I'd applied, he was incandescent. This time I got the job.

With internal vacancies you might be the best candidate for the job you want but you may also be the best candidate for the job you already have.

I requested to extend my annual leave over Easter today. Hopefully not too much like a strop, I was planning to take some more anyway but taken a bit more than I would have otherwise.

I've put loads and loads of effort into this restructure process. We had to do a massive application end of last year - and they kept us guessing about what it would be so essentially spent nearly every spare minute getting portfolios together, then writing answers to all the questions in that application. I got through that and came 3rd - yep they ranked us and told us our position...

Then this application for this job. I've put loads of effort it and basically fluffed it in the interview. DOH.

Sorry you are disappointed op you sound as though you are going through a tough time. I was a manager several years ago bit I wouldn't say that automatically qualified me to be one now things move on fast.

Yes the person best at rehearsing STAR answers will often be the chosen candidate.

I think you want people to say the process was unreasonable - it is up to you when you check emails and if you were expecting an interview nothing was stopping you prep both weekends. A week is a normal amount of time to prepare it is unfortunate it fell at a difficult time for you but that doesn't mean the process was unfair. Hope you find something else soon.

Frankly, I’m shocked at how many replies have suggested OP shouldn’t take time off when unwell. They, apparently, feel qualified to diagnose on OP’s health, when the original post clearly says a professional has advised her:

I see a therapist and the week before this she said she thought I was depressed - because I said I was struggling to get out of bed and do basic things like the washing up and laundry.

Think I'll need to take some time off for mental health reasons, how do I go about this?

No wonder so few people feel able to be honest with even close family members (let alone employers) when they’re not well, mentally. At great cost.

OP has clearly taken this to heart and booked annual leave to deal with being unwell, for fear of appearing to have a ‘strop’.

No reputable employer, which takes its legal duty of care seriously, would expect an employee to work when unwell:

https://www.acas.org.uk/supporting-mental-health-workplace.

The civil service certainly claimed to not too long ago: https://civilservice.blog.gov.uk/2017/10/26/supporting-mental-health-a-top-priority-for-the-civil-service/

OP, I urge you to see your GP and join/consult a union.

I’m sorry about your mum but to be honest otherwise you come across as a bit petulant, entitled, and lacking resilience. Well seeing you work in the civil service with 6 months full paid sick leave. I’m sure lots of us have been in the same position going for jobs someone else has got. When it happened to me I had a bit of a cry, a mope and dusted myself down.

Re the demotion - there’s going to be nothing you can do about that all these years later. Your rights after mat leave are to return to the job you left. If you applied for flexible working and they told you it couldn’t be accommodated in that role you would have been able to go back FT but you accepted the alternative position. It’s on you.

Oh do climb down, the fact the op was clinically depressed only came out later in the thread, In the op it was as she was devastated and angry , so people rightly said not to do that.

It was in the original post about my therapist saying that. I've managed to get through today, as working at home and not been super busy. And have taken annual leave over Easter. Are we not allowed to have emotions or become overwhelmed? I genuinely have a knot of stress in my tummy, had 2.5 hours sleep last night and have had a hellish time of it recently. Keeping everything together as well as poss, then this happens and it's like the flood gates have opened and it's all just come out. I'm upset, and genuinely didn't think I'd be able to work today.

Because if she got the job, she wouldn’t be going off sick.

That’s the difference.

No one is saying you can’t have emotions or be upset.

So it's ok to have mental health issues, but not if they are triggered or exasperated by a set back like not getting a job you were already doing before mat leave. In that case you need to be a robot, say oh well and just carry on. Sorry but life and depression doesn't work like that.

I think if you take a leave of absence out of churlishness, you might as well look for another job, your current employers will write you off for any career progression.

I’m sorry, that was unsympathetic.

I took from your OP that you had depression but still wanted to apply for a job that gave you more hours and more stress so weren’t even close to feeling unable to work at all because of it. After being knocked back you were going to go off on sick leave because you were annoyed at the unfair process and felt embarrassed that you’d applied for and been looked over for the job. This would not be a good reason to go off on the sick for mental health reasons - embarrassment that is.

If this has genuinely exacerbated your mental health difficulties to an unmanageable level though then you should, of course, do what you need to do BUT I would suggest letting the situation calm down for a bit first so you can get over the shock and see how you feel once on a bit more of an even keel, perhaps after the weekend

Ok, OP, with absolute kindness, I think you're conflating two issues.

There does sound like there are some things which could have gone better. .
However, I think, with time, and some reflection, you will see the position of the managers. I've been that manager, trying my best to get someone I know can do the job, but who just doesn't perform well at interview. With interviews and rankings being so structured and monitored in some settings, it can be hard to keep probing someone to give what you know they can in these settings.

You are having a shitty time, with a divorce, losing your Mum, etc., and maybe it's just not your time just now. It happens that sometimes the best opportunities come along, but you are not in the right place/headspace. It sucks, but it's life. Concentrate on you now.

I would suggest you take that little bit longer time off, and think about how you want to move forward. You all had the same opportunities to prepare (and I have never heard of being able to prepare in work time, to be honest.) I would implore you to not give the new person a hard time (but don't train them either!) as it's not that individual's fault.

Wishing you a happier time

The managers in this new structure will be doing more client work apparently anyway, overseen by the manager above, so competing with designers in their team to get ideas chosen by the clients. It will be interesting to see what happens because I can't see how realistically someone can be your manager if they clearly aren't performing as well you 🤷🏼‍♀️

Another downside of the civil service recruitment model being used in a place that's being run like a private agency!! The people who supposed to be leading aren't there because they have design talent but because they are good at interviews.

I've been a manager and I'm not sure what you are getting at. Its easy to employ a person who you know can do the job. It can be done in the blink of an eye.

I think some interviewers fundamentally misunderstood what they are doing, but are also given bad advice. Also the job spec for a skilled job ought to specify the importance of longevity of experience if that's valuable. A person who did something once shouldn't get a job over someone whose done it for years.

I'd say it fully depends on the sector, the evidencing, who is on the panel, and how close run the decision/scoring is.
I'm in Higher Education, and have been for 25 years. Managed many teams, and still not managed to appoint who I thought I would beforehand, when they turned up unprepared, and just didn't give answers which would be highly scored. You can manipulate a score of 1 or 2 points, but not 5 or 10....

In the ops case she was going for a job she had done previously. In addition worked at various levels well apparently and juggled kids.
So it wouldn't be difficult to appoint if you weight the experience which she can't fail to mention. Your criteria which you set needs to weight experience if you want experience.
Seems to me it's that simple. A person who just dipped into a role is just less qualified.