Should I ask my DS and his girlfriend for money

[DiaryofWimpy]

My DS2 has moved his girlfriend in with her 2 cats.

Obviously it’s another person using the washing machine,,TV, gas and electricity they are both 22 and don’t work but get benefits.

Do you think I’m being unreasonable asking them for money?

Tell her she is a short term guest and she doesn't have free rein to do as she likes in your home.

How does she afford 2 cats?

You're a saint for allowing it under those circumstances.

Some of those jobs are jobs that councils have budgets to do. No one would be allowed to fill a pot hole in that wasn't employed by the council and wasn't trained to do it

Well seeing that you think the unemployed should do the jobs that no one else does or wants to do. That's quite telling

You also would not just be able to randomly visit an old person - there are safeguarding issues

Sorry, you do have a choice, stay on benefits and be given something to do or go and find your own role. What shouldnt be a choice is what the OP's family are doing.

I used to be a supplier to central government. The DWP who were one of my biggest clients - quite frankly I wouldnt trust them to cut my toenails. They also wont overule a GP who has written a sick note. Will create even more work for them.

As a supplier I worked with them for nearly 3 years. Honestly the waste, the lack of accountability. They didnt want to pull anyone up on anything suspicious unless it was blooming obvious something was wrong. It wasnt their money so why put your head above the line?

You need a conversation with your son, it was not his decision to make and you need to set boundaries.

Parents can chose to subsidise their children, not strangers and their pets. If you are OK for her to stay, in that money is the only issue, charge her rent and if you are not happy with the cat, tell her no pets.

If she doesn't like it then she can leave. Sounds simple but the reality is often a lot more complicated.

They overruled my GP three times. I applied for lcwra three times and I didn't get it. I had ptsd on my fit note. I was suffering from anxiety and depression. I was on medication. I had been referred to a psychologist - and I scored zero points each time.

The dwp absolutely do overrule peoples GPs. They have the final say.

I expect I'll get shot down in flames for saying this, but I have lived with anxiety all of my life. I am AuDHD and the one thing I find has the biggest impact on managing my anxiety is not medication, it is what I eat and drink.
When I avoid processed foods, seed oils, refined wheat products, fizzy drinks and basically eat what I call real food, my anxiety becomes a whisper.
I often wonder how people who are totally debilitated by anxiety are living day to day.

There has always been unemployment, there has always been the poor. Why do those in 2026 think they are any different?

This used to be all the encouragement that was needed for someone to work hard at whatever job was available, yes benefit claimants should give back to their community by performing tasks. Before anyone asks carers are already giving back. What is stopping the NEET gamers from contributing?

What do you mean performing tasks?

They shoukd both be working, but yes, charge them. They're adults.

Anxiety?? Fk that for a game of soldiers. So are they planning not to work for the next 45 years until they can draw the pension? Absolutely pathetic. I would kick the pair of them out on their arses today.

Am sick and bloody tired of the piss-taking of the younger generation with the ‘anxiety’ bs. The sooner the govt stop allowing anxiety as an excuse to claim benefits, the better. Makes my blood boil.

They are entitled to benefits whether they have anxiety or not. They are both unemployed. I claimed benefits when I had anxiety. I didn't get them because I had anxiety. I got them because I was poor and was entitled to them.

Having anxiety isn't bullshit. It's quite concerning how many people on this thread think having mental health issues is nothing - just because they claim benefits

Repair pot holes, pick up litter, cut grass etc. Of course, if they don't want to do this they can do so and thereby relinquish all rights to benefits.

You haven't answered the NEET gamer question?

That's unworkable as has been said earlier. Not sure what you mean by NEET gamer. Are you assuming everyone under 25 sits at home all day and games?

How do you repair a pot hole? Have you ever done it?

Workhouses? Don't be ridiculous. Why would you make such a comment?

There are wonderful hard working youngsters. This thread is not about them. I will ask again why can't NEET gamers give something back.

I do not know how to repair a pothole but then I don't claim UC. If I did, I would soon learn.

I note the people up in arms about workhouses are those who are contributing nothing to society. If I have got that wrong, please can someone let me know what their contribution is.

You would not be allowed to rock up to a street where I live and start filling in pot holes

I claim UC. Should I be looking out my nearest pot hole filling course when my local council has a budget to fill in said pot holes and isn't doing it?

Basically your view is that people on UC should be forced to do jobs that a council won't do? Or that no one else wants to do. Why is that?

Tell you what, why don't you swap with my husband who is severely disabled after serving his country? I'll show you real misery then. Be thankful you have the cognitive function (he doesn't) and therefore luxury of jumping on here and spouting nonsense about workhouses and how personally disadvantaged you are by the cost of welfare. Or perhaps I could find him a nice Hitler-style concentration camp like those geniuses came up with to 'solve' disabilities in the 1930s....? 🤔 And before you come back with anything about not meaning 'people like him' remember that everytime you cross a line where workhouses and slave labour style 'genius schemes' become part of your rhetoric, you mean exactly people like him when you come out with this generalised crap.

I worked from the age of 23 till 51. Are you trying to suggest that I've contributed nothing to society? I also was self employed for 9 years. I've also volunteered - on lots of occasions including when I was in full time work.

It's quite telling that you see people on benefits as contributing zero to society. Plenty of people on benefits volunteer

If pot holes aren't your thing, please try litter picking?

I have said carers contribute, obviously if you are sectioned you can't nor can the very physically disabled. This still leaves a large number of claimants. They have the time? If they don't and or get a regular job.

Another approach would be to make UC higher but only claimable for 6 months in any given 5 year period.

To be fair, plenty don’t, and plenty who work also volunteer.

Looking after a severely disabled veteran husband and working a demanding full time job around it. Whats your amazing contribution to society other than being so firmly on your high horse that you think no one who is disgusted by your attitude can possibly be a decent member of society. How unpleasant you are.

I've already said that I'm on disability benefits for mental and physical health issues. Your litter picking comment is pretty offensive but most of your posts have been to be fair

And I suppose you have the right to decide who is very physically disabled too? You must be an absolute paragon of knowledge and expertise. I'm overwhelmed with admiration for your incredible skills.

I just said in the post that you quoted that I volunteered when I worked full time