Should I ask my DS and his girlfriend for money

[DiaryofWimpy]

My DS2 has moved his girlfriend in with her 2 cats.

Obviously it’s another person using the washing machine,,TV, gas and electricity they are both 22 and don’t work but get benefits.

Do you think I’m being unreasonable asking them for money?

I really don't think I want to answer your post if that's OK. You made it personal - and I don't have to respond to that.

My TRUE story about my neighbour just shows how easy it is to claim benefits when there is absolutely nothing wrong with you.

He is not going to be the only person across the country doing this is he? It's absolutely disgusting

No it doesn't. There are people who try and claim Pip and lcwra who get turned down multiple times. There are people with terminal illnesses who have been told they don't qualify for pip. Your neighbour doesn't trump these peoples experiences

My brother is bipolar. The only medication that has succeeded in keeping it under control is a depot injection of strong antipsychotic medication. It turns him into a slurring zombie for the first couple of weeks, then he has a week or so of being relatively ok before he starts to become manic, delusional and a risk, at least to himself, and possibly to others (although more due to recklessness than malice).

I'd love to know what job the "get back to work" crowd think he could do, or what employer would accept him working for a max of one week in four.

He's 60 now. He last worked when he was about 25.

My neighbour shares just about every aspect of his life with DH. Not with me because I don't give him the time of day.

He told DH that he was going to give up work 4 years ago. Then when he could not manage on JSA he told him he was going to the GP because of such bad anxiety that he could not leave home. DH actually laughed and said "you are always leaving the house".

He tells him that he has to go to court for non payment of council tax, that his landlord is sending him threatening texts because he owes rent, he has car parking fines he has not paid. Nothing is out of bounds for him!

I am not talking about him trumping anything. His attitude is disgusting and this country lets him, and others, get away with it.

I have reported him numerous times but nothing happens. If someone claims they can't work because they can't leave their house and then they go out every day thats not difficult to find out is it?

No it's not but there are dwp compliance officers who deal with these kind of situations. If he was pulled into a compliance interview you wouldn't be told the outcome anyway - I assume they are also over loaded due to the number of reports they get about people

If they are a couple would they not get the joint rate of £497

or two singles at £316

unless he gets other benefit's on top that leaves him with £116 a month

£80 a week seems a lot as both not working - equally they need to find jobs

your council tax will go up and not a single residency any more

I think it will be tricky having the 3 of you all in the house if none of you work

He's on other benefits. The OP said in previous posts

Their UC won't cover rent because they don't have a tenancy

Some on this thread will excuse this time and time again. Maybe they were getting some fresh air or going out to get medication? I often think that the people who dont want benefits to have a complete overhaul are people who are actually swinging the lead.

Labour tried to get some sensible changes to benefits. Howls of protest. How dare they?

Its rather like a discussion about the NHS and looking at a co payment system which works perfectly well in other EU countries. Screams from some who claim some people cannot even afford 30p for a box of paracetamol. That certainly isnt a reason to keep a broken system in place. Besides my friends Mother still gets paracetamol through a prescription. She was never asked to buy it herself and she said she feels she is owed it as a tax payer previously (she was a dinner lady)

Who cares, they should get a job. Stack shelves, cook burgers, pick up litter.

Things are not free.

Being 22 and on benefits for anxiety is a conveyor belt to staying on them permanently.

Regardless of whether you need the money or they need it more, it's a good practice to help young people understand the running costs of a household. The request for contribution does not have to be aggressive nor the amount necessary exact or punitive -- but the practice of "joining in" is a good habit to help young people to cultivate, I feel.

Actually no. I don't agree with benefits fraud. I just don't agree that disability benefits are easy to get. Some people who say they are haven't been through the process themselves

And herein lies the problem in the UK currently. A whole new generation of people are being raised who think it’s entirely normal to live on benefits if you get a bit anxious.

See with all due respect. If someone has been assessed as being unfit for work by the dwp. Telling them to go out and flip burgers really isn't helpful. It is hard enough to be disabled - particularly if you look well and you get the there's nothing really wrong with you comments - which seems to be running through this entire thread. That people with MH issues are liars and scroungers and all they need is a job to fix them

Good for her.

😮

I do agree with this

if there wasn’t uc im sure they would manage to find some kind of job - as no choice

The team I used to work on did 50-100 benefit appeals a year, the majority for PIP but also many for the limited capability for work element of UC (and its ESA equivalent pre-UC).

In the 10 years that the project has been running, every one of those appeals has succeeded.

In 25 years of welfare rights work, I never lost an appeal. That just shouldn't be possible.

I’m talking from experience, her main post never said they were giving monies and forgive me for not watching every comment posted since. It’s funny how they soon find work when having to fund themselves.

My Lime - genuine question. What you think about You Tube videos and such like to help you answer questions for say PIP.

The number of our young people under the age of 25 who arent in work or education is nearly 1 million! I feel its an attitude and if you have family members who are on benefits and claiming whatever they can you will learn from them and they will teach you.

In this thread there are effectively three people living on benefits - there is a pattern here. Mum is anxious - so is son, so is girlfriend = benefits.

Do you mean at tribunal or at mandatory reconsideration. What I was trying to say is that a lot of claimants give up when they are turned down at the MR stage particularly as it can take time for a tribunal to be heard

When I was 19 and moved into my boyfriends parents house while I saved for a place of our own I paid rent. I was in between jobs (agency work) and still did it. If my kids moved any of their partners in I would expect the same. It's not just about what they use but the principle of paying bills, it's an essential part of life. The sooner they get into the habit of doing it the better. If you don't need the money then set aside to help them save. I had anxiety and depression at that age, mental illness is no joke but neither is responsibility.

I would be telling her to sling her hook and if he doesn't like it he can go too. You are being taken for a ride. Either they pay or go. You are not running a hotel.