BBQ etiquette

[BBQetiquette]

Aibu to think that if someone invites you to a BBQ and says you don't need to take anything, that you still take something? It's the family of my son's sports team that are hosting a BBQ. He's only recently joined and I don't know many people. It must be costing then a fortune. Surely I can't actually turn up with nothing? Husband thinks they've said take nothing so it would be rude to take something. Help me not make a social faux pas 🙈

YABU - the host said take nothing so take nothing
YANBU - you should take something

Definitely take some wine at least

Take a drink? Something not BBQ food like some chocolates?

Take them a gift to say thank you for hosting, but not food for the bbq. If they drink, nice bottle of wine, if they don’t drink - chocolates. Also a bunch of flowers - (preferably already in water so they can just leave on the side and don’t have to faff around with vases while trying to host, but that might just be me !).

how old is your son?

if he’s a junior, it could be the done thing just to turn up.

I would take some wine, and if they are going all out and making a lot of effort, perhaps a gift for the host(ess) like chocolates.

Something like wine, flowers, chocolates.

Agree with everyone else. Don't overrule them and bring actual food, but a thank you gift should be appreciated.

Bring nothing means don’t bring anything for the bbq. It doesn’t mean you skip a host gift. Wine, flowers or chocolates would be perfect.

Yep, host gift. Wine, choc’s, fancy biscuits etc.

Agree with the above comments. You need to take a thank you gift or something that can be shared but won’t tread on the hosts’ toes in terms of catering.

You don’t NEED to

but you CAN if you want to

if double check there isn’t any salads or deserts I could bring to help and if they repeat no need then a bottle of wine or flowers or something

Agree

If I host a BBQ, I always say don’t bring anything. I fully cater for meat/bread/salads and hate having left over burgers in the fridge for weeks when people ignore me! If pressed for a contribution I always say a sharing bag of crisps or something sweet. Drinks are always appreciated too but absolutely not expected.

I wouldn’t take wine as they might not drink it. Wine can be quite a personal taste .

I would take something like a bunch of flowers as a thank you.

As long as it’s something they don’t have to find a vase for, refrigerate, plate up or anything. Something they can say ‘Oh, thanks!’ for and just put down. (Ie, if flowers, already in water. If a cake, already cut into slices etc).

I'd take whatever you are drinking and a gift for the host.

Definitely a gift/s! Wine, posh crisps, chocolates, crate of beer/soft drinks etc :)

I agree with pps to bring a gift for the host. But as they have said not to bring anything it would be no biggie if you didn’t.

Take a gift for the host, not necessarily something for the table.

youre correct they means they’re providing the main stuff but you need to take wine, beer , thank you flowers / chocolate

I'd take some wine or a few beers probably.

Id take something to show you appreciate the invite. Such aa chocolates, flowers, bottle of wine x

I wouldnt take flowers to people i don't know

I would however take an extra bottle of whatever I was drinking for them and avoid taking any food

Take some beers or wine and see what everyone else does, as its your first time there

Take a gift for them or something that can be shared but that does NOT require fridge/counter space. So wine, soft drinks, posh crisps, chocs, all good. Salads and burgers, baaaad.

As others have said,do not bring food as they've already planned what/when to cook and they don't want some random stuff to deal with. However,I would bring some wine and chocolates as a thank you for the invite gift.