Avocados are deceitful little bastards

[likelysuspect]

Look ripe. Feel ripe.

Not ripe

Five minutes later. Over ripe.

Make sure they have the stalk when you buy them. Don’t remove to check if they’re green. I buy them hard and ripen at home. I don’t buy them with my online order as I can’t check them myself. We get a lot of avocados as they’re good for people with epilepsy. 99% of the time mine are lovely green and ripe.

I too detest them, unless buried in a hot Mexican meal...

Im still wading through this stupid little thing

And I can confirm that the stalk test does not work. This thing is still like concrete but the stalk came out when I barely looked at it and touched it earlier

I still have a quarter left tomorrow

Im microwaving it for a bit as suggested, still hard.

How do shops keep the tubs of smashed avocado from going brown please? Some chemical, lemon juice, what?

Its lemon or lime juice or some sort of other acid if its a UPF

however I have tried that at home, wiped lemon juice over the avocado that Ive cut in half and it just hasnt worked, nor mushing it up with lemon or lime juice, still goes brown

Another point against them in the portfolio. Its not looking good Avo.

I had no idea you could buy frozen avocado! Amazing discovery, thanks ☺️

Finally, an avocado bashing thread. They give me the shits, the little bastards.

YANBU OP.

I love a good avocado. I used to have half an avo every day in a smoothie and then, bang! They suddenly gave me a horrible tummy ache, for days.

I know intolerances can come and go, but I'm too scared of that tummy ache to find out if I'd still be affected after several years.

Must be a chemical, since I did exactly what you did, and it didn't work to keep them green either. But I just threw them in the blitzed up fruit mix for the porridge, being brown or slightly hard doesn't matter then.

Avocado roulette. Fuckers.

@Bunniemalonedefinitely kiwis, I’ve loved them for years now all of a sudden they have an added ingredient that blisters my mouth and lips so I’m now allergic to them 🤬

Oh Ive always had this with kiwis, what is that? I dont get full blisters but severe irritation.

I once bought a birthday card that said ‘One Day Older Only Matters If You’re An Avocado.’ 🥑 😂

I haven't seen one for weeks.
I went to asda last Monday. Asked an assistant whether there were any avocado in the warehouse.
Person said no. They're flown in from Israel.
A man standing next to assistant Person daily it's a good job.

So I have to now add to the portfolio that they are politically controversial.

That is typical of avocados.

I think my partner was fed up of me playing Avocado roulette, so bought me a soft toy so I would always have a ripe avocado

OH GOD YES and the PRICE! In M&S I pay £3.80 just to open the Present of Brown Disappointment. they know I won't traipse through town with a bag of mush to complain.

They are like the worst Kinder Eggs ever invented.

😂

Worcester sauce? I'm intrigued. I'd try it but I'm too skint to waste money on a disappointing avocado.

This has bought back a memory of when i was in hospital with our 1st DS, had to stay in for a few days as he had an infection.
I was vegetarian back then, my DH would bring in an avocado each morning so i could have it with toast ,
26 years later, going the menopause rages and i think i want to smash his face in
I read this thread and have a lovely memory, thankyou!

They lie. Like satsumas.

I regularly have satsuma disappointment.

But not for too long or you get banana flavoured avocado 😖

What mystifies me is - how do restaurants manage to have a stock of ripe but not over-ripe avocados available and on order? How do they manage to guarantee that they will be OK? Do they throw away lots?

It's all part of supermarkets conspiring to have us be the patsies between them and the bin

The high demand in Europe and US for avocado is causing considerable deforestation and soil degredation in Mexico. I don't buy them now. It's just another food fad, it will pass, but the soil in Mexico may never recover.