What's your upper age limit for having last baby

[Suburbiton63]

Just that really!
I am 37 would love one more (a third) but just don't think I can put my body through I again.

Depends on circumstances. We struggled to conceive and had our second at 40. No issues with pregnancy and she was a dream baby. I think if I was younger I would have considered a third as both pregnancies were very easy at 35 and 40. Ironically we now have a large enough house for more children but it is a little too late!

I had my first at 40. I wish life had worked out differently so I could have had more. I'd still like another but it never happened - if I found out I was pregnant I'd be delighted. So maybe 47?

DH is older than me though so if I was 47 I think realistically he'd be too old.

Do you actually KNOW this or just taking an uneducated guess?

Yes of course I know it. Having adult children is NOT the same as being child free. No “guessing” about it . It is not the same thing full stop.

See I would hate the full moon party in my 20s. My DS hard no interest in attending one either at 20/21

And you can meet people in hostels at any age

So you've actually been backpacking in your 40s /50s?

I do regular AND have adult children.

Age 35+ is considered an advanced maternal age and carries more health risks

right .

I’m 38 and I wouldn’t consider having another but that’s easy for me to say because I had my two at ages 21 and 25 so I’ve got my children but if I didn’t have any at this point I may consider having a baby.

i said for ME it wouldn’t be the same because of the type of lifestyle and socialising I did back then . I actually couldn’t do that stuff anymore even now in my late 30s but had a blast at the time. Appreciate you might be different .

But that's sod all to do with age then. My 22 year old DS is child free and still doesn't do the type of parties you talk about

Good for him. We all have different personalities and interests . I loved travelling and partying with zero responsibility at his age . That’s why I’m saying I didn’t want kids in tow . Appreciate not everyone is the same .

I had my last one at 37 and first one at 30, the only difference between the pregnancies was feeling more tired at 37.
I think my last child has the best version of my me/my parenting, the others were closer together in age and I was juggling work etc I’m more aware now of how quickly time flies, stress less over the small stuff and just enjoy being their Mum.
I’m early 40’s and close relatives had another one around the age I am now, I wouldn’t have any more now, 38 was my limit if I hadn’t fallen pregnant by then, I would have stopped at 2

Is this helping, OP?

No cut off here, and had mine in my 30s and 40s. No way I'd have been ready in my 20s. I think it depends where you are, too. My whole NCT group was my age - a young mum round here would be more likely to be mistaken for a nanny than a woman in her 40s for a granny!

U don't have ADULT kids in town though

What ? No I didn’t have any kids in tow back then nor did I want to.

If you’re having doubts about putting your body “through it again” then maybe you’re at your personal cut off?

It really depends on how soon you started having children/were able to have children as well so every single person is different.

I’d say it’s around mid 30’s for me.

Look I appreciate that you think travelling and partying in your 50s is the exact same as in your twenties but I disagree and that’s it. It’s a different life phase altogether in my opinion. Being in your 20s travelling with no life baggage is different in my opinion. Appreciate you probably disagree and wouldn’t want my choices either . We are all different . I’m just outlining why I woudnt have wanted them in my 20s personally.

Agreed.

That's fine but I don't see why you seem to think adult kids are restrictive and make you not " fully free"

Thechaseison71 · Today 13:05

Travelling in your 50s after kids is much more appreciated than by many of those in their 20s

And if you have done a decent job of bringing up your kids they should be independent adults ( barring SN) so dont restrict you

TheIceBear · Today 12:56

Yeh but you aren’t fully free compared to child free people you still have adult children no matter what way you look at it . Plus backpacking and travelling in your 40s is never going to be as much craic as your 20s that’s my opinion.

I don’t understand how you don’t understand the difference to be honest . Yes they are independent of course but you are still a parent regardless. You are still there to provide support to adult kids if something goes wrong. Having zero responsibility, zero ties etc in your 20s not having settled down yet is different in my opinion .

Ok if you say so. Providing theoretical " support" doesn't mean to can do your own thing lol.

It doesn’t but it’s a totally different life phase than your 20s regardless. I’m not replying anymore I’ve made my point not making it again.

That's fine but I don't see why you seem to think adult kids are restrictive and make you not " fully free"

I would agree with this though personally, once you have children you are a parent forever. I would not want to be away from my children for any significant length of time, even as adults...I wouldn't go travelling for months on end as I could have in my 20s (not that I did!) as I would miss them, and even more so if there were grandchildren in question.

I also think that surely unless you are really wealthy it would be much harder financially to go off travelling/on lots of long holidays in your 40s/50s? In my 20s I worked in retail and lived with my parents (or alternatively would have been renting), I could have saved up and taken off for however long I wanted with no consequences. Now I am in my late 30s I am in a career and working in a far more senior role which I couldn't just drop and pick up again a few months down the line, and I also have a mortgage, which will still be the case over the next 20 years so I don't have same level of money to drop on travelling.