That's a bit simplistic though and also actually in my own case completely incorrect.
My parents have always worked. When my bio parents divorced my mum as a single mum worked her arse off full time to keep a roof over our heads.
I genuinely didn't even KNOW of the existence of benefits bar vaguely having heard about "the dole" which wasn't for people like..us?
I never knew you got help if you're were too unwell to work etc.
It was drilled into us that if you wanted anything in life...you worked. So I, and all of my siblings had jobs from as soon as we could (16 for me and my younger sisters both had jobs from 15).
I've actually suffered from severe mental illness since I was 11. I was very badly bullied as a child which unfortunately led to very severe depression and anxiety which led me to be suicidal and self harming by aged 12. At the worst of that I didn't even think I'd live to 16. As it happens I did, and yes I then did what I was supposed to and got a part time job, in retail...
...back in the days where you got paid £3 and hour and god forbid your till was down cos they'd be docking your wages. I was supposed to just be a weekend worker but I was constantly being called in to work every hour they needed. Including during my GCSEs. I still remember them having a go at me for saying I couldnt do a weekday shift as I was literally sitting my exams. We were as young people on a whole treated like shit.
And actually all of it basically was what led to my first suicide attempt. But don't worry my mum was no pushover, she insisted I still went to work the day after the attempt because it would "look bad to call in sick" 🫠
In fact when I applied to uni I got zero support as she very much insisted I did not in any way shape or form tell them I was mentally ill as "they might reject you".
So i did the whole uni thing with zero support, had a pretty fucking bad time of it (witha lots of self harm and suicidal ideation), though did by some small miracle actually graduate 😬
So obviously after uni...you have to get a job! And I, was not in ANY way aware part time work could have been an option..instead I'd been brought up to believe if you worked, you worked full time. End of. In retrospect had I know I could have worked part time and gotten help for my mental illness I actually probably wouldn't have lost that job or experience what happened to me. As it was being very mentally ill I point blank was unable to cope with working full time. So once again I attempted suicide. Did actually almost work, however obviously as a result I then lost my job. And then I was fucked. I didn't know what to do
As stupid as this sounds, I came out of the meeting to tell me I no longer had a job and obviously still being suicidal I remember calling a helpline. They were the ones who advised me to go to the jobcentre to ask for help.
So I did. Had never been on one before. Had no clue what to do. Spoke to someone and told them I was ill, suicidal and had lost my job. They got me an ESA form to fill in (and then got angry and shouted at me for not knowing my national insurance number by heart-after many year of DWP you very much will remember it 😬). I ended up being put into the support group under the severe risk factor (and was always awarded that first time no appeals based on extensive medical evidence)
That then basically in addition to me being taken under the CMHT team led to me basically being declared too unwell to work for the next 3 1/2 years. The difference to now is the ACTUAL help I got. I think I've posted before but for that entire period, I had an NHS psychiatrist I saw every month, I had a community psychiatric nurse I saw every week, I had an occupational therapist I saw every few months, and I saw my (same) GP weekly for support also. After 3 1/2 years I felt well enough to try and work again
Because actually for me..that was the most important thing. ALL I wanted when I was too unwell to work (and after many times being told I might never be well enough to work again) was to be back in work and have a job. Cos to me...work
.having a job...was what "normal" people did.
And thankfully 13 years ago my current employer gave me a chance. And they've been very supportive with Occ healh and adjustments to enable me to KEEP working.