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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To just not know how to access the NHS

152 replies

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 17:21

I've not tried very often tbf, is there something I'm missing?

I started feeling unwell 4 weeks ago, just a standard cold. So I let it work through, but at the end was left with a nasty cough and completely blocked ears. Tried some home remedies, which didn't work, and then 2 weeks ago started feeling fluey, shivery achey etc. And my ears started leaking muck.

So clearly something infected, prob need antibiotics. I went to the chemist, who gave me a full list of questions, and then said they couldn't look at ear infections unless I was under 17. At the age of 49, I reckon she could have informed me of this before asking all the questions.

She advised me to go to the GP (next door) and ask for an urgent appointment. I knew it was going to be too late in the day for that, but went in to ask. They confirmed that I couldn't have an appointment, but looking at me thought I should be seen by out of hours, which I should phone after 6.15.

I phoned as requested, and after a triage I was told the Dr would phone back within 2 hours. They said it was likely I'd have to go to a location 30 miles away, which DH would have to take me to because although I drive ,I'm only insured on the work van for work purposes (yes this is ludicrous, but I've been quoted 4k minimum on the family car because I once ASKED whether I could do some deliveries in the car, and they decided to cancel my insurance!)

So we sat up till midnight waiting for the call, both of us had work in the morning so gave up then. I eventually got a call at 4.30 am, which of course I missed. So the following morning, I actually felt a little better, but the pain and itching in my ears was extreme. I attempted to phone the GP, the recorded message informed me I could hold, or make an appointment in person. The surgery is roughly on the way to work, so that seemed the better option. I went in, to be told that no I couldn't make an appointment in person, I should go and phone. I tried to phone from outside, where it said I was number 45 in the queue, but they could call me back.

They inevitably called me back when I was driving, and when I phoned again all appointments were gone. The following day I tried again. Work can in theory be a little flexible, they don't mind me picking up the parcels an hour late, but of course if I do so I need to work late. And of course the later I start, the further from my home town I'm likely to be at a time I might be offered an appointment. I've never had a day sick, and I accept it'll have to happen sometime, but I really can't afford to take a day off just to attempt to make an appointment, costing a day's wages and risking my job (self employed gig economy, they just give your round away). Again I missed the call back while driving.

So I googled the antibiotic ear drops I'd had a few years ago. I was surprised that I could buy them and pay 24 hour delivery. I purchased them, and nothing turned up. So I rang the chemist, who said there was a hold on my order because of a tech issue which hadn't confirmed my email. She sorted it out on the phone, and sent me an email so I could confirm details. It didn't arrive again. I phoned again to be told there was a note on my file that they were out of stock, would I accept a different brand? Yes, of course I will, why haven't you emailed/texted/called? What use is a note on a file I can't see?? I receive the eardrops 4 days late, my ears are agony...

The eardrops work a treat, after a week all itching/pain/discharge has gone. But I still can't hear, and there's quite a bit of swelling in my neck and jaw which is uncomfortable. I still think I should see a doctor. This should be easier now because it's not urgent? I can just book an advance appointment I can get to? No apparently not, I've got to do the 8.30 call back thing, and hope that a) they don't phone when I'm driving and b) they can offer a late enough appointment that I won't be miles away and can get to it.

I just don't understand how I'm supposed to make this work.

OP posts:
NotAnotherScarf · 23/02/2026 17:26

Why not go to a and e? I know it's not an emergency but I've done this with my wife when an ear infection got too painful.

Plus I would write to the doctor and complain that you had a call at a ridiculous time and have not been able to get an appointment

igelkott2026 · 23/02/2026 17:28

Is there an urgent care centre anywhere nearby where you can go and just sit and wait?

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 17:29

Yeah, I was on the verge of that, but discovered I could get the online ear drops.

But now I just want a more routine appointment, I need my ears looking at, and I have reason to believe my thyroid is causing problems. I definitely won't get any luck at a and e now, how do I just get a routine appointment?

OP posts:
ZemblanityZen · 23/02/2026 17:32

Absolutely not unreasonable. Dd had a similar experience being bounced between pharmacist and GP. Neither would look at her and she kept missing calls. She was finally offered an appointment in 2 weeks for an urgent situation. Called 111 and they made an immediate appointment for her at the hospital. It shouldn't have to get to that point.

MissMoneyFairy · 23/02/2026 17:34

Can you go on the doctors website and request an e consult, are you signed up for the nhs app which lets you book appts online

zurigo · 23/02/2026 17:34

It's hell isn't it OP? Our doctor's surgery was just like this for years, but last year they brought in the most amazing online system. Does your surgery have one? But as a PP says, if you cannot get an appointment and you really need to see someone at a time that you can accommodate with work/life, then go to A&E. An untreated ear infection can lead to deafness, so don't keep putting it off.

rwalker · 23/02/2026 17:34

Always found 111 great in these situations

Auroraloves · 23/02/2026 17:44

Do you have an online account with this GP. I usually submit an e-consult and then get a message or email with advice or treatment.

WeepingAngelInTheTardis · 23/02/2026 17:47

You should just be able to ring at 8am and make an appointment for that day.

Mrsm010918 · 23/02/2026 17:58

Surely you just need to call and wait in the queue rather than asking for a call back? That seems the most likely way to get an appointment in your situation

Octavia64 · 23/02/2026 18:04

Yeah this happened to me.

pharmacy wouldn’t see me. GP no chance.

I wound up paying 70 quid for a private online gp who prescribed me antibiotics (penicillin) and my daughter was able to pick them up at our local pharmacy.

for some stuff you just can’t access nhs care any more.

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 18:08

Mrsm010918 · 23/02/2026 17:58

Surely you just need to call and wait in the queue rather than asking for a call back? That seems the most likely way to get an appointment in your situation

But I can't possibly wait for that long on the phone in the morning. I start work at 8.30, which can be delayed until 9.30 but that will mean working until 6.30 in the next county over. There doesn't seem any point in sitting on the phone to try and get an appointment that I won't be able to get to.
If I start earlier there's at least a slight chance that I'll be back in the local area in the late afternoon, to tie in with a hypothetical appointment.

Apparently, ALL appointments are now same day only (according to the phone message), I just can't see how I can possibly use one. I'm no longer urgent, I want a chat with the doctor about my ears and general health, which I suspect might be thyroid related. This isn't anything that a and e or urgent care could help with. An appointment in 3 weeks would be fine, but apparently they don't do that any more.

OP posts:
BennyHenny · 23/02/2026 18:11

In your situation I’d contact the practice manager and ask for their advice on how to access an appointment.

FreshInks · 23/02/2026 18:16

What did 111 say? They usually arrange appointments in situations like yours.

yellowgarden · 23/02/2026 18:17

Can’t you do an e consult? Our surgery has an urgent box to click on and a non urgent box. You fill out your info and they decide what to do with it. I do this for any non urgent things. Usually I get a call back and a discussion sorts it or they will make a routine appointment. For the things I’ve had issues with I’ve sent photos or had discussions and not needed an appointment at all. All very quick. When my son had ear issues, they booked him an appointment.

in this day and age, healthcare is a lot more virtual, that’s the only way they can get through the numbers. You’re going to have to find a way to talk to them on the phone when they call I imagine and after a few questions, they’ll book you an appointment to check you over.

Orangebadger · 23/02/2026 18:20

In my GP I request an appointment online and they then message me with a load of dates over the next 3 weeks. Sounds like this is what you need but it may be that your practice don’t do this which is not great as we all need routine not same day appointments with our GP from time to time.

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 18:21

FreshInks · 23/02/2026 18:16

What did 111 say? They usually arrange appointments in situations like yours.

They said a doc would phone by 8pm. That's the one that phoned at 4.30am (and I was asleep and have no hearing atm)

OP posts:
FreshInks · 23/02/2026 18:22

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 18:21

They said a doc would phone by 8pm. That's the one that phoned at 4.30am (and I was asleep and have no hearing atm)

I mean when you called them back after missing their call?

SunshineMel678 · 23/02/2026 18:23

I gave up on the NHS around 2015. I have had private health insurance ever since.

I did have to go to A&E once, when I was pregnant, and honestly, if it wasn't for my unborn child I would have walked out to just let myself die. Worst 24 hours of my life. Not because what was wrong with me but the dire, dire care I received.

Hiddenhouse · 23/02/2026 18:23

Goodness only knows - after 17 years working in the nhs from receptionist up to director I’m none the wiser. I contacted many parts over the weekend and by Monday I was told I had missed two appointments while recovering no texts, emails or phone calls! And this was after fighting the GP, 111, urgent treatment centre and two hospital trusts to try and get care which wasn’t A&E!
The ‘system’ is such a mess.

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 18:24

yellowgarden · 23/02/2026 18:17

Can’t you do an e consult? Our surgery has an urgent box to click on and a non urgent box. You fill out your info and they decide what to do with it. I do this for any non urgent things. Usually I get a call back and a discussion sorts it or they will make a routine appointment. For the things I’ve had issues with I’ve sent photos or had discussions and not needed an appointment at all. All very quick. When my son had ear issues, they booked him an appointment.

in this day and age, healthcare is a lot more virtual, that’s the only way they can get through the numbers. You’re going to have to find a way to talk to them on the phone when they call I imagine and after a few questions, they’ll book you an appointment to check you over.

There's an online thing that says book appointment, but when I try it just gives me a limited range of options (smear tests, asthma reviews etc), anything else it says you have to phone.
I'm happy to phone, but if they only ever offer same day, then there's no chance I'll get to it because by the time I've found out when it is I will be a significant distance away.

OP posts:
FrostyMorn · 23/02/2026 18:24

BennyHenny · 23/02/2026 18:11

In your situation I’d contact the practice manager and ask for their advice on how to access an appointment.

I agree. You could basically email what was in your OP.

SEmyarse · 23/02/2026 18:25

FreshInks · 23/02/2026 18:22

I mean when you called them back after missing their call?

Oh, they just said my case was closed, so I'd have to go to my GP (since it was no longer out of hours)

OP posts:
ginasevern · 23/02/2026 18:25

The whole thing is a fucking ridiculous mess, especially if you're working full time like the OP. It's probably not so bad if you wfh but even so.

KitsyWitsy · 23/02/2026 18:31

Accessing the GP is a nightmare! In your situation, I'd have gone to the out of hours clinic where you sit and wait. It does take literally hours but I think that's the only way.

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